DKM Musings

I'm committed!

2012-01-11T09:18:00.002-05:00

Registration Confirmation for:

The Locomotive Half Marathon and the Locomotive Thunder 5K
Dear Danelle,

Congratulations! You are now registered for The Locomotive Half Marathon and the Locomotive Thunder 5K. Please check the event's official website for updates: http://www.locomotiveraceseries.com

View your complete registration details »
Thank you for registering for the Locomotive Half Marathon and the Locomotive Thunder 5K! Stay tuned to www.locomotiveraceseries.com for all the latest updates!

Registration Details
Confirmation #: 60703412-011112053634
Date & Time: 02/19/12
Location: Town Center Mall (Map)
Purchased at: 01/11/12
Category: Locomotive Half Marathon
Name: Danelle McNew

I did it! I registered! No turning back(no refunds)! Less than 6 weeks to train! So excited! I need a cold-weather running shirt and a new playlist. I can't wait to say I've run 13.1 miles. Holy cow, that's a long way! Here's hoping my training goes well and feels good!

What are your new year's goals???

one part of our trip: sweat bands, ice baths & the ER

2012-01-09T08:39:00.003-05:00

I know, it's a crazy title. Let me start off by saying D.R. & I had the most wonderful 2 weeks together traveling through 3 states and seeing both sets of family. We began our trip in Nashville- one of my all-time favorite cities. My family went to Nashville most every summer when I was in elem-middle school. We love the music-influence of the city, the beautiful country-side, the quaint shops and the amazing local dining. I remember drinking my first strawberry-limeade slush at SONIC (we didn't have sonic in FL growing up) and then going to a Chick-fil-a parking lot where Jars of Clay was playing free for the locals. Awesome stuff.
Ok back to my story. This post is only going to tell one snippet of our travel experience- the rest being oh so much more cheery.

We had a great 3 days in Nashville, visiting college friends, hearing great music at awesome venues, eating artsy-fartsy food (me=love, D.R.="where's the meat?" :)), walking and walking some more in downtown Franklin & Nashville, Going to the Opryland Hotel and looking at lights! Fab. Well our last full day of the trip, I woke up with a sore throat which is always how I know a fever is coming. But I ate some breakfast, drank some O.J. and I started feeling better. We met one of our college friends & beloved bridesmaid of mine, Laura Durchsprung, for lunch at Puckett's in downtown Franklin. Great lunch- Caesar salad, fried chicken and veggies. I still felt at 90%. Well I hadn't run in 3 days and mentally I was clawing at the chalkboard if you know what I mean. I had to get outside and pound the pavement someway somehow. Laura recommended a nearby park. I had packed running clothes so I was ready. D.R. graciously read in the car while I ran my 3+ miles around the park. It was 61 degrees but I bundled up b/c of the slight "ick" feeling I still had. Sports bra, long sleeve tee, pull-over, leggings, nike shorts, head sweat band and mittens. I was toasty. I usually shed layers when I run in the cold but I decided that it was good for me to stay bundled and just bear the pouring sweat in all my crevices. I finished, I rang out my sweat band (cause my head sweats more than the rest of me). I felt great. Yes, calories burned and people prayed for!! I walked back to the car, we drove back to downtown Franklin where I wanted to get a to-go order of churros from SOL (a food-network seen restaurant with great Mexican dessert) With churros in tow, we headed back to our hotel in downtown Nashville. I began to get a little chilled due to the sweat in my cotton attire (note to self: invest in wickless running shirt)and by the time I got back to the DoubleTree I had blue lips and was violently shaking. D.R. kinda chuckling at me which is what he does at first when he is nervous or concerned. I immediately got into the hot shower and let the water try to warm me up. It didn't. I couldn't stop shaking/convulsing. D.R. got in, held me and I still didn't stop. I sat down in the tub and let the water warm cover me from the spout. Still not working. I couldn't even breathe evenly. I got out- ran to the bed and got bundled in the covers (which is what D.R. suggested). He ran out to CVS to buy a thermometer. Eventually I calmed down and the shivering subsided. I still felt terrible- cold/hot spells and achy all over. D.R. returned and took my temp- 104. He wanted a more "accurate reading" so he took it anally. (oh to be married to a health-care professional) temp=104. He looked at me in fear and said, "you need to get in the shower and be iced." "what?!!? no!!! I can't, D.R., I'm freezing!!?!" He said he knew but he was afraid I had over heated my organs by bundling up so much during my run and they could be "cooking". Ok- not cool. I reluctantly got out of bed and heading into the bathroom. I can't explain the pain of having ice-cold water poured on you, ice-cold dipped towels wrapped under your arms & in-between your legs for 10 minutes. I was crying the whole time meanwhile believing that my husband was only doing this because he was concerned for my health. He took my temp rectally after 4 minutes- still 104. He continued the torture. Took my temp again- 104. This really scared him. "We're going to the ER." 10 minutes later I'm being wheeled out of the hotel on a stretcher. A little embarrassing. My first time in an ambulance. The young paramedic looks just as nervous as I am. We get to the hospital, they take my temp which is down to 100 by this point and take my blood pressure. They decide to take a blood sample to see if my white count is elevated- something about D.R. thought my liver could be affected from the internal heat. (I think I got that right) 2 hours later- turns out I just have a virus and shouldn't have run if I wasn't feeling 100% well. duh, Danelle! I feel immediately humbled. D.R. is completely embarrassed and ashamed for the ice-bath thing but I reassure him that he was only doing what he thought was necessary. I told him that I'm glad he's willing to hurt me to help me. :) That night marked the very loving, tender tone for the rest of our trip. God used it greatly in both our hearts. For me, I realized that exercise is definitely an idol that I depend on too much for how I feel and act. It was so hard to not exercise for a full week after that. Mental hell. But I learned to respect my husband more and love my idols less. I still love to get out there and run but I don't feel guilty if I skip 2 days now. I'm so thankful for that lesson that God so brutally taught me. He gets our attention and persistently draws us back to Himself and for that I am so grateful. I guess He just wanted me to "chill out"- literally. :)

Merry Christmas

2011-12-16T17:30:00.002-05:00

taking a blogging hiatus until after the new year. I hope everyone has a joyful Christmas. What a special time of year. I can't wait to write about our extensive travels when we return.

May the joy of knowing Christ fill your hearts in this next week and for always.

Substitute It

2011-12-15T13:59:00.010-05:00

I've made some yummy eats lately and wanted to share them with my blog world.

I made this for senior girls Bible study and it was a hit.

Baked Oatmeal. Hearty. Healthy. Fiber-packed & filling. Plus, it tastes dang good too. You can substitute apple sauce for the butter if you want to make it even healthier.

Thanks to Pinterest/Annie's Eats for the recipe. I'll be making this a lot of Saturday mornings from now on.

I made Christmas Quinoa with pomegranate for our ladies, "Pinterest-inspired" lunch at work yesterday.

It's delicious and so good for you. It has toasted pine nuts, pomegranate arils, peas, green onion & pomegranate dressing in it. Quinoa is a little scary-looking as it resembles fish eggs but don't be scurred. It's delicious & fiber-packed. It's a little chewier than rice and is gluten-free. A nice break once in a while from oats, pasta or rice. It's a blank "canvas" that you can add anything to. Sweet or salty. I think I'll try some in the morning sometime and drizzle some honey and dried cranberries over it. And it's so festive, isn't it?! Thanks Eat8020 for this amazing recipe. (disclaimer: I substituted kamut for quinoa. Kamut takes too long to cook)

I made these little cuties for a couple different things.

1) youth Christmas party; 2)work. They were a hit. I think it's the mascarpone cheese. You can substitute chocolate chips for black beans. Yes, it tastes good! I can't explain how but the beans take on the choclately flavor of the brownies and you're tricked into eating something good for you! Can I get a "amen!"????
I used strawberries for one batch and raspberries on another. I have to say, the strawberries looked cuter. Thanks again, Pinterest. You're stealing way too much of my time these days.

I have found some other really great, healthy substitutes lately.
Bolthouse Yogurt Salad Dressing. It's very low-fat and low-cal AND it tastes great. Although it's a little pricier than others, it's worth the nutrition difference. Now I look forward to eating salad's at lunch time.

Wasabi peas instead of nuts. They are 90% lower in fat than peanuts, cashews, almonds, etc. And I love the spicy-ness.

Mini-Pretzels instead of chips. I love me some chips. Especially plain, salty, tortilla chips. But Rold Gold pretzels have barely any fat at all and you can eat two big handfuls for only 120ish calories! Salty craving? Satisfied.

Animal Crackers instead of cookies. They are a slight addiction of mine. I have a bag in my work desk, a bag in my pantry at home, and (gasp) a bag in my car. But you can eat 16 of them for only 120 measly calories and 2grams of fat. Bye, bye cookies.

Greek yogurt instead of sour cream. Make sure it's 0% fat Greek yogurt. You'll never taste any difference in your casseroles. Promise.

Ok, that's enough food love for now. :)

Put It On a Plate

2011-12-13T11:56:00.003-05:00

Great tip from a fellow blogger- especially around this "munchie", holiday time.

If you are a snacker like me, you probably know it. But when does snacking actually turn into grazing? What's the difference? Well, snacking is having a small meal between meals when you are actually hungry. (a yogurt, a piece of fruit, a handful of crackers/pretzels) Grazing is eating small amounts all day long, possibly due to cravings, boredom, stress, some hunger, etc.

Snacking may be a good idea. It will give you that little energy boost in between meals. Grazing, however, may actually cause you to consume MORE calories than you would by eating regular meals. Eating little amounts all day long may never trigger your satiety cues, leading you to constantly feel like you are hungry.

So what do you do if you ARE a grazer? I say "Put it on a Plate". Make an occasion out of eating. When it is placed in front of you on a plate, your portion may appear larger than if it was something that simply traveled from the bag to your mouth via your hand. Putting it on a plate may also cause you to think before you eat. What is the reason why you are eating? Hunger should be your answer (there are exceptions).

To get out of the habit of grazing, try having three basic meals. Make them balanced, then assess your HUNGER between meals. If you are hungry, try a small snack AND...............put it on a plate.

A Wonderful Week!

2011-12-12T09:46:00.009-05:00

I'm so glad D.R. is home. After 4 weeks away from each other, it's good to have him back in everyday life...to have him there when dinner is ready...when I need my dress zipped up...when I can't reach the olive oil and feel to lazy to go grab the step stool. But I didn't just miss him in those moments. I missed him because he's part of me. He's my flesh. I'm incomplete. Sweet stuff that marriage stuff. :)

We had a great week & weekend. A recap:
Tuesday night we went to dinner at Bonefish Grill. One just opened in Columbus and it's been hard to find a night when the wait isn't an hour at least. We didn't have the best experience. Both our meals were "eh..." Should've gotten the bang bang tacos. Those are tried and true. But we went home and watched 007:Golden Eye and played with champ.
Wednesday night was our church's Christmas dinner. Such a special event. I love our church family. And great food. A delicious catered meal of lemon chicken or mushroom Marsala roast, steamed veggies, salad, roasted potatoes and 2 kinds of dessert & coffee. Singing Christmas carols and hearing the Christmas story through a drama presentation was heart-warming. Earlier that day, we took our Christmas card pictures with our friend Zach Smith. I can't wait to get our cards in the mail (hopefully tomorrow) and sent them out! They're pretty cute if I do say so my self. (Thanks Zach!!)

Thursday we went to 2 different events to support our youth. D.R went to a middle school boy's football game and I went to a Christmas Choir concert at Calvary (the school I work at) to see two of our youth, Laura & Daniel. We love our youth and love to support them.

Friday, we went to a musical "Joseph's Journey". It was a concert feat. songs by Journey, REO Speedwagon & Rick Springfield with the lyrics slightly altered ("Oh Mary" instead of "Oh Jenny" by REO, "Joseph's Girl" instead of "Jesse's Girl" by Rick Springfield) You get the picture... :) It was awesome. It told the story of Christmas (80's style) through Joseph's eyes. A light presentation of the gospel & the Christ-child but still fun. Afterwards, we went to dinner with Zach, Chelsey, Jordan, & Caleb- great friends from our small group. We ate at Woodstone Mediterranean- THEE best hummus you've ever tasted. I was a happy girl.

Saturday, we woke up whenever the heck we wanted, drank coffee, and watched a Christmas movie.

Almond Pancakes

I finished my Christmas shopping (can I get a Hallelujah!?) and then took a long, slow run outside. It was glorious. Just enough chilliness in the air to keep me going for 7 miles.
D.R. & I went to see my dance studio perform The Nutcracker that night. It was special to see it with people I know in it. All of my level 5 girls had special parts which was exciting to see. They are so talented. So poised and graceful. Ballet is hard stuff. It takes strong legs and balance and determination. I'm glad these girls have the solid foundation of ballet when they come in to my jazz class. Now, to get them to shake their booty a little more.... :)

Sunday: church. Christmas hymns, Peppermint-flavored coffee creamer, the Word proclaimed. Ahhh..... love it. We sing this hymn "Let all mortal flesh keep silence". It has a dreary, minor-key sound but is so powerful and I'm always in awe of God's holiness as we sing the words.
"Let all mortal flesh keep silence,
and with fear and trembling stand;
ponder nothing earthly-minded,
for with blessing in his hand,
Christ our God to earth descendeth,
our full homage to demand.
At his feet the six-winged seraph,
cherubim, with sleepless eye,
veil their faces to the presence,
as with ceaseless voice they cry:
Alleluia, Alleluia,
Alleluia, Lord Most High!"

Last night, we had our youth Christmas Gift exchange. We made out with a Justin Bieber poster (yes!) and very fragrant lavender hand soap (yippee). We brought a $5 whoopie cushion key chain and yes, a middle school boy tried to steal it twice.

It was an eventful, fun week with D.R. Life is so much more fun with him and I'm thankful to know what it feels like without him so I can be more thankful when I'm with him. It hasn't been all-peachy, argument-free since he's been home (yes, we argue. We're sinners) but I'd rather have him home and argue with him than not have him home. Time to get back on the sanctification train. :)

Merry Monday.

light meets the dark

2011-11-30T15:38:00.004-05:00

Sometimes I feel like my heart is just going to leap out of my chest. Like it's pounding so hard that it might just rip me apart and leave my body lifeless. There are things I've learned about some of the teenage girls, here at the school I work for, that would make you vomit.... or at least cry. The dark place that these girls have lived in is simply, demonic. Utter godlessness. They didn't choose the family they grew up in. They didn't DO anything to deserve their past.

But it happened.

It happened to them. It's their story.

And it's how God got a hold of them.

Sometimes the story of salvation has to begin with pain. For some it doesn't happen as a young grade school child in Sunday school who all of a sudden has fresh eyes to John 3:16 and understands God's gift of grace in Jesus. Sometimes it has to start with tears, with "why me?"s, with darkness.

But then, one day, it's as if a sliver of the blinds lets a small stream of light in and gives a glimpse of hope. And then all of a sudden, the blinds are pulled back and the Light consumes the darkness; laying bare all it's lies and chains and scars. And the funny thing is....we still choose the darkness. The Light is illuminating, warm, comforting and yet we choose the cold, damp, sticky, sin-infested darkness. Because it's comfortable. Because it's the only choice we CAN make apart from the indwelling Holy Spirit.

It's funny how the darkness actually makes the Light more beautiful. The contrast accentuates it's brilliance. Nature does this on it's own but us humans...we like our darkness. Praise be to God that he plucked these girls out of the darkness and gave them Light.

Gave them Himself.

Their circumstances haven't drastically changed but their hearts have. They have joy, real God-given joy to face whatever God brings their way. They are even learning to "count it all joy"- past and present trials. I have loved seeing these girls grow in their love for our Savior. I love that I get to remind them that He is not only in the rainbows but in the storm.

He's right there.

Holding them. Carrying them through it.

These girls are helping me see God's faithfulness. Their stories are heart-breaking but the redemption is sweet.

Thank you God for your steadfast love and mercy.

Help us to not only thank you for the patience in the storm but to thank you FOR the storm itself. For by it we are transformed from one degree of Godliness to another.

Sara Groves and the Sovereignty of God

2011-11-29T10:33:00.002-05:00

I love Sara Groves. She's one of my favorite artists. Her songs are deep reflections of the human heart. Her songs are life-giving and God-glorifying. You may be in the middle of a valley right now and it feels like the walls are crashing in from all sides. Let me remind you that He is in control. He has a plan. He uses what man intends for evil for our good and His glory. Hold on. Open your hands. Trust His goodness.

"Open my Hands"
I believe in a blessing I don't understand
I've seen rain fall on the wicked and the just
Rain is no measure of his faithfulness
He withholds no good thing from us
No good thing from us, no good thing from us

I believe in a peace that flows deeper than pain
That broken find healing in love
Pain is no measure of his faithfulness
He withholds no good thing from us
No good thing from us, no good thing from us

I will open my hands, will open my heart
I will open my hands, will open my heart
I am nodding my head an emphatic yes
To all that You have for me

I believe in a foundation that will never dry
Though I've thirsted and didn't have enough
Thirst is no measure of his faithfulness
He withholds no good thing from us
No good thing from us, no good thing from us

schedules, turkey & sweat

2011-11-18T11:29:00.003-05:00

While D.R. has been gone, I have kept my own schedule..uninterrupted. I work till 4, I run till 5:30/6, I go to the grocery store or pick up a cheap meal, I make/eat dinner, I shower, I facebook/read/blog/online xmas shop/play with champ/phone-chat, I go to bed. I'm a creature of habit as I believe we all are and I get frustrated when my schedule is interrupted. Example: being on vacation in the mountains unable to find a location to run or eating too late at night and then going to bed feeling like the Macy's Day parade balloons. I don't adjust well to situations like that. I get stressed out and irritated when I can't sweat a few days in a row. My stomach starts churning, my muscles get tight and I don't sleep as well. Next week is Thanksgiving and I'll be home in Boynton Beach, Fl with my mom & dad. It'll be weird being there for a holiday without D.R. AND without my sister in the house. This year it's just mom, dad & I. I know that to an extent I can "keep my schedule" but I pray I can be more flexible and go-with-the-flow. And oh the food.....

So in a week, we will all be getting intimate with a gravy boat (or I know I will). I'm looking forward to the good eats but my conscience is heavy thinking about the time I will need to put in to work off those excess calories.

Enter Pure Barre. Along with my new found love of running, this work-out is a calorie-burning sweat-fest! I can't say enough about it. The burning, muscle-shaking is addictive. I've been running more than pure barring and I got back to it Wednesday night and boy did my muscles miss it. The instant tight toned feeling it gives my arms, legs, glutes, & core is satisfying and you know you worked out hard when your carpet has a visible wet spot from the dripping sweat. (which champ licks up, gross)
So ladies, get your rear in gear. Don't be defeated over the green bean casserole-turduken-sweet potato souffle-pecan pie indulgence. Buy the $10.72 Pure Barre 1 DVD and feel empowered. All you need is a light set of weights (2-5 lbs) and a stable support such as the back of a chair or counter top. You'll have a clear conscience going into Thanksgiving and a clear one if you continue. It's worth it!

Viva PB! and Happy Friday! Enjoy the weekend!

let's merry!

2011-11-16T11:04:00.003-05:00

It feels like people around here are skipping right over Thanksgiving and celebrating Christmas already. Which is kinda sad b/c I love Thanksgiving BUT it's also making me happy b/c the red cups are back!!!

i LOVE, not like but LOVE Starbucks holiday drinks. Like, you don't understand. It's everything I can do to resist going every chilly morning through the drive-thru to get a skinny, tall peppermint mocha with an extra shot. Yum. Or a caramel apple cider. Slap your grandma good!

Tomorrow-Sunday between the hours of 2-5pm it's buy one holiday drink, get the second one of = or lesser value for FREE! Take your spouse, bff or kid and take advantage!! Happy Wednesday and show some luv to the Bux!

during the next month

2011-11-08T10:22:00.004-05:00

D.R. left this morning for San Antonio, TX. He is going for his Officer Basic Leadership Course training (OBLC- b/c everything is an acronym in the Army) He will be gone until December 6th. 4 whole weeks. My heart is sad and dreading the loneliness at night. I know it will make me miss him, appreciate him, love him more but it hurts to say goodbye to your other half. As of yesterday morning, we still weren't sure if D.R. was going to OBLC due to complications with his orders with the Army. So so so much red tape to go through when you are "special" like D.R. is. Let's see if I can explain this right...
He is one of the few Army employees who is directly commissioned by the federal government/President. The Warrior Training Center on Ft. Benning needed a medical professional for their battalion. So his position was created out of necessity and there are only about 100 spots like his in the Army. Because of his specialness, being employed on the federal level & being a Nat'l Guard member on the state level, he can't be on two sets of "orders" Orders= a "belonging" status; an issued responsibility of employment. D.R. had to come off of his P.A. federal orders and temporarily be put on Nat'l Guard training orders. (to prevent double-dipping and legal issues) Anywho....confusing. I was so upset at the higher up dudes that didn't get this taken care of months ago.
If not for D.R.'s battalion colonel (Mr. Siter), who made some "calls" and got it taken care of, he wouldn't have been able to go today. It says something that this man got it all done in one weekend when this paperwork usually takes 2-3 weeks to get approved. Helps to have friends in high places of authority.

So D.R. is about to land in San Antonio, go to his hotel and get settled in and mentally prepare for a 5:30a.m. P.T. test. Poor guy. His hinny is going to be whipped into shape. I'm so thankful that our friend Geoff Gunn will be there with him. Some familiarity will help D.R. make it through.

I plan on using this time to work on D.R.'s Christmas gift (which I'm really excited about!), spend time with my high school girl's Bible study group (I'm taking them shopping in Atlanta Friday!), train a little harder to run a 1/2 marathon possibly in February, eat more vegetarian "funky" meals (that D.R. will have nothing to do with) read my Bible more often, and catch up with old friends on the phone.

Here is a yummy vegetarian meal I found on one of my favorite food blogs: Eat 80/20.

http://www.eat8020.com/2011/11/80-spaghetti-squash-tacos.html

I think I'm going to start eating 4 vegetarian meals a week and only eat 3 dinners with meat. I feel much better and not so weighed down when I fill up on veggies instead of lots of chicken or beef. We'll see how that goes.

2011-11-04T10:33:00.002-04:00

We are headed to the Blue Ridge Mountains this afternoon with my sweet in-laws. I am looking forward to soaking in the beautiful fall weather and just relaxing on the cabin porch.

Exciting News: D.R.'s cousin had their second little girl yesterday. Elinor Faith Frye joined the world weighing 7lb.7ounces. Healthy and adorable. Congratulations Grace & Justin! We can't wait to meet her!

Break-ups

2011-10-26T15:53:00.002-04:00

I talked with a student today about her break up with her boyfriend of over a year. She's struggling and I really had no profound words. I've been there. I've felt that hurt that feels like it's going to last forever. I've felt the guilt and wondered what I could've done better... different. Then I found these wise words from a friend/musician, Mike Donahey. This is what he told a friend of his that recently went through a break-up.

"Bro.
Don’t give up.
I can definitely understand the hurt man.
I’ve been there.
And I do know this, remember that though hurt is used by God,
it is still in its essence, unnatural.
It is a result of the fall, of the fracture that happened
in our union with God when we wanted to take control.
Be encouraged friend,
this is not how it’s always going to be.
And I know that losing this girl feels like you’ve lost
all of yourself, but here’s the good news,
and maybe bad news depending on how you look at it,
but I’ve been married for almost 2 years now, and I’ve
been surprised to find that my wife can’t make me happy.
I mean, she’s awesome, don’t get me wrong,
but the problem is that I’m just made for more than
even she can give me.
And so, I’ve had to come to terms with the fact, that
since God loves me, he won’t let me be completely happy
with anything other than Himself.
Yes, It’s painful, but it’s good.
I can promise you that.
If you think of it, I’d really suggest a book to you
called, “A Severe Mercy”
Basically, this dude loses his wife to cancer I think,
and he realizes that it was the severe mercy of God
that allowed it to happen, because basically,
she was his God. He didn’t know it at the time,
but the most merciful thing God could do was to take
her from him, because only God can last beyond this life.
Only God Himself can satisfy.
And yes, we have to walk through the midnight hour of
the soul to get there sometimes, but what you’ll find
on the other side is so much better. it’s so much more free.
Could you imagine, if God Himself was all we needed to be content?
What could mortal man do to us?
What could anyone take away?
They couldn’t.
They can’t.
Hang it there bro,
we’re just strangers here while we walk this earth,
and there’s light on the other side of this."

the comparison battle

2011-10-25T11:14:00.004-04:00

I made a new friend this past weekend. Her name is Ruthie Dean and she is a terrific writer. Go here to read her blog. I came across a post she wrote a few months ago shortly after she got married. It spoke to my heart in such a strong way. It's good to know that we are not alone in this battle of "i'll never be good enough... thin enough... crafty enough... smart enough... domestic enough..." It's exhausting being so critical of yourself all the time. But I am. All the time. I read Ruthie's post and was so encouraged. We are daughter's of the King who has indeed created us unique; with different strengths and character qualities to enrich the body of Christ.

Ruthie Dean: Life as a MRS:The Comparison Battle

St. Andrews PCA Youth Camp 2011: ROCKtober!!

2011-10-25T09:01:00.016-04:00

when I say we have an awesome youth group & youth leadership team, it's really an understatement. what a fun, exhausting weekend we had. Lots of memories made!

At the farm

around the campfire

and then the Adventure Race began.

hay bale race!

One of the volunteers, Josh, MADE two Sudoku boards. Amazing.

Mad Gab!! So hilarious. Love that game!

Gross food competition: Margaret, workin' on a huge portabella mushroom.

throw up them Rawkfists!

we also had an awesome dance party!

a devo by the pond.

camp fire and smores!

the group of volunteers. such a great group!

The kids learned about three Rocks: the rock of self (which is unstable), the rock of God, & the rock of Christ. It was an awesome weekend and God was honored in all our fun and tiredness.

Here's the group shot. I missed it b/c I decided to run to the bathroom (cause I hadn't gone in like 8 hours due to the adventure race) and at that moment they took the picture. Bummer. But what a great group!!

and I told you that Thousand Foot Krutch video had a purpose. Here it is; our awesome guy volunteers!

Lightbulb Moment

2011-10-21T09:24:00.001-04:00

I came across a Bible verse that hit me like a blinding light which revealed all the corners of darkness and confusion I had in my mind and heart. I have read this verse, literally 100+ times and never seen it in the light that I did only recently.

I work at a Christian school; grades preK-12 but I am in the high school office. It's not uncommon for me to have deep, theological conversations with students on a daily basis. And it's amazing that I get to do so at my workplace! It's challenging. It's convicting. It's sobering to hear the student's hungry-souls struggle over the hard truths of the Bible. And there are hard things to mentally grasp in God's Word. But the amazing thing about the Bible is that it is able to regenerate a 4 year old and able to regenerate a 90 year old heart. It's that personal. It's that illuminating. It's that diverse and relevant.

Philippians 2 verses 12-13 says, "Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure."

How could I not have seen it before? God's sovereignty displayed in this verse. The age-old discussion of 'Choice v. Divine Will'; 'Free-will v. Pre-Destination'. It all makes sense when we realize what verse 13 says, "for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure."

"So my working and willing are necessary. They are real. But they are not first or ultimately decisive. God’s willing and working is decisively under and in my willing and working. The word “for” is crucial. I work because he is working in me. I will, because he is willing in me."

[and this is crucial] "Believing this precedes understanding how it works. God says it. I believe it. Now I am spending a lifetime learning what it is like to live this way.

Paul did not just tell me to live this way. He modeled living this way one chapter later. He said in Philippians 3:12,'Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own.'

His pressing on to secure the resurrection from the dead (v. 11) is rooted in Christ’s decisively securing him for the resurrection from the dead. In other words, all Paul’s striving is real, and it is certain because Christ makes it certain. He modeled the same thing in 1 Corinthians 15:10, 'I worked harder than any of them, though it was not I, but the grace of God that is with me.' So abandon any anti-Bible intellectual baggage you have inherited from planet earth, and recalibrate your brain to embrace the paradoxes of real human choice and decisive divine sway." - John Piper

We have an impossibly gracious, powerful, loving God who is in control of all things. Praise be to God!

Camp ROCKtober

2011-10-19T15:53:00.000-04:00

that is... our youth group Fall retreat that's taking place this coming weekend. Friday evening through Sunday afternoon we will be in Pine Mt, Ga at our friend Chelsey Smith's parent's farm which is breath-taking. It's the sort of place you escape to to find rest and feel God's presence through the outdoors. I can't wait to spend time with our youth and grow deeper in my knowledge and love for Christ. We have a stellar group of kids

They are a blast to be with!

I will post about the weekend next week sometime but until then I'll leave you with this video.

...it will make sense later.

-D

Maw-wich

2011-10-07T15:49:00.000-04:00

mow-wich is what bwings us togedda today...

:)

These pics were taken at a wedding that we went to last weekend. Our small group friend Allen Whitley and Emily Marshall (now Whitley) became husband and wife! It was a fun night. Our bud, Zach Smith took some sweet photos of us at the wedding.
I love weddings. Especially when both people are believers. So covenantal. So pure. So God-honoring.

Have a great weekend! Love your spouse!

On being thankful

2011-10-03T10:36:00.000-04:00

It really is amazing how many times the apostle Paul reminds us to "be thankful" in his letters. It seems he knows that it is something that is important and valuable. Thankfulness combats so many things: jealousy, envy, discontent, depression, ungratefulness, selfishness..the list goes on.

Lately, I have been so thankful for my spouse. I have a few precious single girl friends who want to be married and when I see them in church on Sunday, faithfully worshiping with the church body and trusting Christ as their "husband", I am reminded that the Lord sweetly gave me a man to do life with. He entrusted me D.R. to care for and love. D.R. has been so kind and thankful for me lately and it has been a reminder that I need to do the same to him. He always thanks me for cooking him a meal and folding and putting away the clothes. Two things that he is thankful he does not have to do- nor does he enjoy doing. I enjoy doing them because I know they relieve him of these duties. And when I choose to do them with this in mind, I do them joyfully which is so much more fun than doing them out of necessity/obligation. My husband is a thoughtful person. He gets inside other's heads and finds out what's important to them. For example, our youth pastor Zach is a photographer and loves to take pictures (obviously) so D.R. brought a camera to youth group and took some pictures of him playing ultimate frisbee with the youth kids for him to have. Zach is usually never in the pictures we hang on the youth wall, because he's behind the camera.

Or when a family member's birthday is coming up, he is the first to remind me. (mainly because he sets a reminder on Google calendar a week in advance- genius!) He was the one to remind me that Buddy's birthday was at the end of September and he did the research for his birthday present. (a "all things on Baseball" book- one of Buddy's loves in life) I stink at gift giving. I admit it. I'm not good at it at all. Thank goodness for giftcards!

I love that my husband is others-focused. He is always looking for ways to give $ to organizations or friends who are in the mission field. We are a big supporter of Samaritan's Purse and every year around this time, we do Operation Christmas Child. It's become tradition to go to Walmart together and pick out age & gender- appropriate toys for a child. He always does a boy and I, a girl. It was D.R.'s idea to write our child a personal letter, telling them about us and our love for Jesus Christ (and we always include a picture of us so they can know who we are) It's been a neat way to serve together around the holiday season.

Changing gears.... I have struggled in the past to appreciate who my husband is. For a long while, I have battled with comparing our marriage to others; comparing my husband with other husbands. I wasn't being thankful for the great qualities D.R. has. I'm learning to be a "student" of my husband- trying to recognize his strengths and be his cheerleader and recognizing his weaknesses and not putting him down for them. I'm trying to notice what stresses him out and take those things off his hands. I'm learning that guys need to hear "I love you" and "you look hot, honey" just as much as girls do. In fact, I feel like a man's confidence is more fragile than ours sometimes. I'm reminded to touch him more- to make him feel I desire him and value him physically. He's loving me a lot better than he did at the beginning of our marriage. I hope he can say the same for me.

I can truly say: Thank you God for allowing me a wife. Thank for you giving D.R. to me as my spouse. Thank you that I can go through life's joys and sorrows with a believing man leading me. Thank you for my husband's strengths. Thank you that he is mine.

three milks

2011-09-23T15:42:00.000-04:00

that's right. good english. It sounds better in Spanish.

I had my first piece of Tres Leches cake today. This cake consists of not one, not two but three types of dairy. My kinda cake. Evaporated milk, condensed milk and half and half. And you can't cut corners. Even the health nut that I am considers it a sin to use 1% or...gasp Fat Free milk in this recipe. Our Spanish class had a culture day and I sampled my fare share of Latin confection. My favorite being the tres leches. It's a very fun cake to make as well as being fun to eat.

Here's a video from Food Network star Alton Brown making the cake. Enjoy. Happy Friday!

http://www.foodnetwork.com/videos/tres-leches-cake/66440.html

My Savior's Prayers

2011-09-14T12:27:00.000-04:00

Sometimes the fallen nature of our world bears down deep on my soul and leaves me feeling without hope. Recently so many loved ones around me are fighting battles that the Lord has not called me to fight. (yet) A co-worker's husband got diagnosed with a terminal brain cancer and given at most 6 mo. to live. A family member continues to struggle with a paralyzing drug addiction and depression, the father of two of my girls in my dance class abandoned his family and told his wife that he doesn't love her anymore. Devastating, heart-wrenching times. My heart is grieved over these people's struggles. There have been certain times during a trial when my prayers were reduced to nothing more than cries for help throughout the day. "Lord, have mercy on me." "Lord, I need your grace." "Lord, please help." On these days I sometimes feel guilty that my prayers lack substance. Then I remember the truth of Christ's prayers for me:

"It is a consoling thought that Christ is praying for us, even when we are negligent in our prayer life; that He is presenting to the Father those spiritual needs which were not present to our minds and which we often neglect to include in our prayers; and that He prays for our protection against the dangers of which we are not even conscious, and against the enemies which threaten us, though we do not notice it. He is praying that our faith may not cease, and that we may come out victoriously in the end." Louis Berkhof, Systematic Theology, p.403.

"If I could hear Christ praying for me in the next room, I would not fear a million enemies. Yet distance makes no difference. He is praying for me."Robert Murray M'Cheyne, Robert Murray M'Cheyne p.179.

What enormous comfort and courage poured into my soul when I remember my Savior's prayers! He cares deeply for his people and his Spirit intercedes with groans so deep we cannot understand or bear them. Praise God that He is always at work in my heart even when I am choosing disobedience. I love my Savior. My advocate. My voice to the Father on my behalf. I know he is faithful to work all things out for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose. I am trusting that promise for these families. I know everyone knows of people that are hurting. Will you join in prayer for those in your life who need it most?

"Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working." James 5:16

Mobile

2011-09-13T11:06:00.001-04:00

This past weekend I went to Mobile, AL. It was such a wonderful two days filled with seeing old friends. God took us to Mobile, AL for 2.5 years of our marriage and looking back I am so thankful He did. The women I met there are precious to me. They are real. They are available and always filled with Christ's love. Those were hard years in our marriage with D.R. being in P.A. school. A lot of lonliness. A lot of meals eaten alone. A lot of feeling like just a roommate to my husband. So many women encouraged me and walked beside me during those years.

Saturday morning I went to a ladies brunch at Bette's house (one of the older ladies in the church- always a gracious hostess). It was just what my heart needed. Cinnamon rolls, hot coffee and time in the Word with 30 precious God-fearing women. We sat around in small groups on her back porch with the glorious breeze of 78* and discussed God's attributes, challenges He has brought into our lives in the past year, what we've learned from them, and what area of "His means of grace" we struggle with most. (praying/fasting, accountability, time in the Word, corporate worship, communion) Then we heard from a dear sister in Christ, Morgan Spivey. She spoke from Psalm 145 about God's greatness, goodness/righteousness and nearness. She also touched on the end of 1 John 5. It was awesome to sit and ponder those attributes of our God. I rarely sit and think about how great He is (v.3), how good & righteous He is (v.7), and how He is near at all times to those who call on Him in truth(v.18) I needed to be reminded of those things. I can so easily get stuck in "my" own little world and my problems, responsibilities & insecurities seem so big and overwhelming. I forget that I have a God, a Father who cares. Who loves me unconditionally and knows my stored up idols; who longs to replace them with Himself and fill me up with all that He is. I will always hold a very tender place in my heart for the women at Grace Community Church. They are a group of women, young and old, who are all willing to pour into other's lives and serve. God used so many of them to mold me, teach me, convict me and encourage me to be a stronger woman of the Lord- to love His Word, to love D.R. I am eternally grateful for their mentorship and friendship.
Sunday morning I got to fellowship again with that precious congregation of people. It was a somber day as I reflected on ten years ago and the attacks of 9/11. I got to eat lunch with my old boss/the pastor, Jim Bryars and his wife Becky and daughter Caroline. We sat at Newk's and caught up on the past year. It was lovely.
I'm thankful I got to spend time with great friends!

The Doctrines of Grace

2011-09-01T09:28:00.000-04:00

I struggled with these concepts for years. I actually ran the opposite direction when people started discussing them. I was angry. I was ignorant. I was fearful...that they may have some truth in them. The doctrines of grace, or as they are known in "slang terms", The 5 Points of Calvinism (T.U.L.I.P) are hard truths to swallow. It is only after the Holy Spirit softened my heart and opened my eyes to see (spiritually speaking) these truths as Truth; as Biblical. It has changed me- changed the way I view God, my sin and the glory of the life, death & resurrection of Jesus Christ.
I believe you can be a Christian and not hold these truths to be Truth. I know that there will be fellow brothers & sisters in heaven that think they were born sinless/innocent(that sin is an "outside" influence), that they made the choice to have eternal life with Christ, that God sent Jesus to die for all (even those who would go to hell), or that some believers can lose their salvation. I think this is bad theology and I think plenty are going through life with this bad theology. These people produce weak fruit, teach their children bad theology and miss out on the joy of living a truly God-honoring life. There are those Christians- and God did die for them. But for some, God in his great mercy and for a great purpose, has revealed these glorious doctrines of grace. The result should be obvious: the fruits of the Spirit seen clearly.

So, do you believe these things?

Total Depravity
Because of the fall, man is unable of himself to savingly believe the gospel. The sinner is dead, blind, and deaf to the things of God; his heart is deceitful and desperately corrupt. His will is not free, it is in bondage to his evil nature; therefore, he will not--indeed he cannot--choose good over evil in the spiritual realm. Consequently, it takes much more than the Spirit's assistance to bring a sinner to Christ--it takes regeneration by which the Spirit makes the sinner alive and gives him a new nature. Faith is not something man contributes to salvation but is itself a part of God's gift of salvation--it is God's gift to the sinner, not the sinner’s gift to God.
(Genesis 2:15-17, Romans 5:12, Psalm 51:5, 1 Corinthians 2:14, Romans 3:10-18, Jeremiah 17:9, John 6:44, Ephesians 2:1-10)

Unconditional Election
God's choice of certain individuals unto salvation before the foundation of the world rested solely in His own sovereign will. His choice of particular sinners was not based on any foreseen response or obedience on their part, such as faith, repentance, etc. On the contrary, God gives faith and repentance to each individual whom He selected. These acts are the result, not the cause of God's choice. Election therefore was not determined by or conditioned upon any virtuous quality or act foreseen in man. Those whom God sovereignly elected He brings through the power of the Spirit to a willing acceptance of Christ. Thus God's choice of the sinner, not the sinner’s choice of Christ, is the ultimate cause of salvation.
(Romans 9:10-21, Ephesians 1:4-11, Ephesians 2:4-10, Romans 8:29-30, Acts 11:18, Acts 13:48)

Limited Atonement
Christ's redeeming work was intended to save the elect only and actually secured salvation for them. His death was a substitutionary endurance of the penalty of sin in the place of certain specified sinners. In addition to putting away the sins of His people, Christ's redemption secured everything necessary for their salvation, including faith which united them to Him. The gift of faith is infallibly applied by the Spirit to all for whom Christ died, thereby guaranteeing their salvation.
(Matthew 1:21, Romans 5:12-21, Romans 3:21-26, Ephesians 2:8-10, Titus 3:5-6, Philippians 1:6, John 10:11-30, John 17:6-12, Romans 8:28-30, John 6:44, Acts 20:28)

Irresistible Grace
In addition to the outward general call to salvation which is made to everyone who hears the gospel, the Holy Spirit extends to the elect a special inward call that inevitably brings them to salvation. The external call (which is made to all without distinction) can be, and often is, rejected; whereas the internal call (which is made only to the elect) cannot be rejected, it always results in conversion. By means of this special call the Spirit irresistibly draws sinners to Christ. He is not limited in His work of applying salvation by man's will, nor is He dependent upon man's cooperation for success. The Spirit graciously causes the elect sinner to cooperate, to believe, to repent, to come freely and willingly to Christ. God's grace, therefore, is invincible; it never fails to result in the salvation of those to whom it is extended.
(John 3:16, Matthew 22:14, Acts 17:29-31, Matthew 23:37-39, John 6:44, Romans 8:28-30, John 1:12-13, John 3:1-8, Ephesians 2:8-10)

Perseverance of the Saints
All who were chosen by God, redeemed by Christ, and given faith by the Spirit are eternally saved. They are kept in faith by the power of Almighty God and thus persevere to the end.
(John 3:16, John 6:35-40, John 6:44, Philippians 1:6, Philippians 2:12-13, Jude 24-25, Ephesians 1:13-14, Romans 8:28-30, Romans 8:35-39)

Shout Out! ::Pure Barre::

2011-08-28T15:26:00.001-04:00

I can't talk highly enough about the work out that I have fallen in "burning"-love with! :) Pure Barre. A fusion of pilates and ballet.
Lift. Tone. And Burn, Baby Burn! It's a 45 minute full body workout that will flatten abs, lift the seat, tone your thighs and give you well-defined arms. It works every area a woman could want to work - arms, thighs, butt and abs. It's amazing and addicting. Each strength section of the workout is followed by a stretch section which will help achieve the slim look of a dancer. While my whole body is stronger and leaner, I can see the most difference in my thighs. They've always been my "problem, fat-gathering" area. I've never been able to achieve leaner, tighter thighs. I tried running 3-4x/wk, weight workouts 3-4x/wk and could not achieve the results I wanted like PB does. And the burn!! oh the burn!! it is like dark chocolate! you just want more and more. I have such a feeling of accomplishment after a "burn-session" and I've done my sweating for the day in 45 minutes!! I still try to run 2-3x/wk b/c it's a stress reliever for me but honestly PB is all you need to melt the fat. I own the original workout dvd which is no longer available on www.purebarre.com but can be purchased on amazon. It's the first dvd that comes up when you search "pure barre".

Carrie Rezabek Dorr (creator/founder) has since put out 5+ dvds and they are all great. Basically the same muscle groups worked in different ways. If you live in a city that has a PB studio, join! It is so encouraging to be in class with 20+ other women who are burning with you! It is a bit pricey so I recommend owning a dvd and taking one class/week. I look forward to the day PB comes to Columbus, GA! Two of my sorority sisters, Danielle Davis & Lindsay Lancaster own the studios in Birmingham and they are the ones who inspired me to try PB. I was hooked after the class I took from Lindsay! I wish I had a studio here to teach at but I'll continue to lift, tone, burn in my living room! So if you're looking for a great workout that's quick (but not easy) and effective, try Pure Barre.

work: a blessing

2011-08-12T15:51:00.000-04:00

Back in April I was hired to work as the high school administrative assistant at Calvary Christian School. This job has been wonderful for me. I feel like it is tailored for who I am and that who I am is being tailored for this position. It's such a privilege to work around other believers. I have held jobs in the corporate world and in the christian business world and the difference is remarkable. (as it should be) I love the women and men I work around 40 hours a week and love the high schoolers I see roaming the hallways. We just finished teacher orientation week and talked about everything mentioned in the student and faculty handbooks. It was exhaustive but lots of great information. Our mission statement made me love this school even more. It says this:

Calvary Christian School exists to encourage students to accept Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord, develop a Biblical worldview, attain their individual academic excellence, and fulfill their God-given responsibilities in the home, church, and community.

I love the choice of words. "encourage" students. "attain" "individual" academic excellence, "responsibilities". Such great exhortation for our young, bright minds! The education world requires a lot of one's time and energy. I love our teachers and admire them so much for the endless hours they put in to give our students the very best educational experience they can receive. No one works at a Christian school because of the salary. Every teacher and staff knows that we would be paid twice what we make if working in the public school system. Every co-worker of mine is at Calvary because God wants them there and gave them a love for children. If you would've asked me a year ago what would make me most joyful, I would've said, "having a baby and being a mom". My response now is "serving the Lord joyfully in whatever capacity He has me". I feel like I'm right where He wants me to be. For now, my "children" are the 147 high schoolers.

St. Louis: Why I cannot live the same.

2011-07-27T10:10:00.000-04:00

WARNING: this is going to be a very lengthy blog post.

Two weeks ago, I went with our youth on a missions trip to St. Louis, MO. I have been on American mission trips before- every summer of my high school years in fact, so I thought I knew what was in store. I knew we would be tutoring inner-city children, working on people's homes and leading a kids club/VBS. I knew we would hear speakers each morning and evening. I knew we'd be in tight living quarters with one or two bathrooms shared between 28 people. I expected it to be convicting and for God to do things in my heart but He did so much more than that. So here's a rundown of what the trip was like.

We woke up every morning at 6:00am for breakfast. Packed our lunches and had a quick morning devotion before heading off to the church (New City Fellowship) for morning session & tutoring. We tutored children ages 4-17 from 9:30am-12:30pm. We then had lunch with the kids (most days) and then headed off to our work projects. These ranged from intense/dangerous to mild and heart-warming. One group took off an old roof and put down a new one(with only one injury to report! a nail in a foot-- tetanus shots were in tact, no worries) Another group pruning vegetables at a farm and plowed/weeded. Another group (mine) painted a widow's back porch and re-tiled her bathroom. Another group took down lots of mirrors from inside an old house. Another group sat and drank hot tea with elderly widows. A wide assortment of afternoon ministry! We did these projects from 1:30-4:00 and then had a break until 5:30. We ate dinner at the church each night and then headed off to Kids club/VBS. We split our group up and went to two locations- one at a local park and one at an apartment complex's courtyard area. Both were in the urban part of town. This was from 6:45-8:30pm. We sang songs, made a craft, had a snack and heard about the gospel through the story of Jonah. As you can imagine, we were all exhausted by the end of the day.

We took 23 kids and 5 leaders on this trip. All white/caucasian, "southern", upper/middle-class kids; the majority believers (ok, we had one French kid but he was definitely in the same description box). We have a very smart,strong group of teens. At our church we teach theology early on and most of our kids can recite the shorter catechism. (no, probably not) but seriously, they know the deep implications of Ephesians 2 and Romans 9. (Salvation by grace alone and God's sovereign choice in election) They are very grounded on gospel issues and can argue with the best of them. The NCF group was impressed with the Biblical knowledge of our group and felt challenged and encouraged.

This is Anjana Diyali, a Nepali girl who came to our Kids Club at night.

One of the central visions of NCF is racial reconciliation among the different communities in St. Louis. Their church mission is this: "To seek the establishment of God's kingdom rule in the hearts of people from every ethnic group by discipling the nations in the reconciling Gospel of Jesus Christ through a clear proclamation of salvation by grace through faith in Christ alone and by doing Spirit-led deeds of justice and mercy." St. Louis is now home to many refugees. I didn't know that the people I would be spending the most time with were refugees from Nepal and Burma. People who were forced to flee their country for political/religious reasons and placed in different American cities across our country. The group I worked most closely with was the Nepali community. (a country on the very north edge of India) Precious, precious people. Very hospitable and generous. Each night at kids club, they would invite us in to their small, run-down apartment and offer us whatever food they had (even though we had just come from dinner). They would let us hold their babies and play with their older children. So free, so giving, so trusting. So....non-American. I was gripped with the fact that I, a white American girl, have so much fear of other cultures. I fear I would never invite a black or Indian or Asian family into my house for a meal and let them play with my children. It was freeing to let God peel off the racist scales from my eyes. Throughout the week, I found myself convicted over little things that used to be second-nature. Like locking the door while riding through "the ghetto". When on our way to work projects one afternoon, Rhoda, the black intern from NCF was riding with us. We were riding through a part of town which was dominantly black so my instinct was to push the "lock" button. I thought about how it would make her feel and I felt uneasy about doing it- so I didn't. Not that I wouldn't have if I was by myself, but her being in the car... I felt she could've taken offense to it. There is nothing wrong with being safe and wise but my heart at that moment was not thinking "be safe", it was thinking "black man=danger" and that is wrong. All men are sinful and capable of evil. Why should I fear a black man more than a white man? Little things like that happened all throughout the week- revealings of my fearful, racist heart. It was so sad and yet so good of the Lord to convict me.

We had some really serious talks about who Jesus is and what living as a Christian looks like. She is an intelligent, kind girl.

I thought about my life. I live in the suburban part of town. I go to an all-white PCA church, I work at a private, Christian, basically all-white school, and I teach dance to all white ballerinas. I have zero interaction with any other race unless it's the clerk at Target or the waitress at my fav sushi joint. I live in a white bubble inside of a very cultured city. If I am not deliberate about it, I will never have a friendship with a black woman or an asian woman or an indian child. I can float through my life communing with caucasians only and I know that I would still go to heaven because I am saved by Christ's finished work on the cross. by grace alone, through faith alone.. & the rest of the Solas. I believe them. I'm not saved based on the merit of my good deeds (of my amount of mission trips). But I am God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus, FOR good works WHICH He prepared in advance that we should walk in them. (Eph.2:10) It's the overflow of gratitude for what Christ did for me on the cross that compels me to love other races and cultures. It's not natural. It's intentional and supernatural. Since going on this trip to St. Louis there is more of an urgency in me to love other races. To be involved in their lives. Maybe... to do life with them. But what does this look like? This is what I am praying about- what does God want for D.R. & I concerning racial reconciliation? And what is it that needs to be reconciled? I mean, I like black people. I like Asian, Hispanic and Indian people. But do I like them enough to do life with them? I don't know. Would I be willing to relocate to the urban part of town? To shop at their grocery stores? to send my children to inner-city schools? to have play dates with their children? I don't know if God is calling us to this, but I do know He's set my mind to think deeper about these issues. He has reminded me how He loves. "The Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth." Jn 1:14 Jesus was fully God when He was fully man yet He didn't commute back and forth to heaven. He dwelt among us. The poor, the needy, the sojourner. He felt our pain, shared in our suffering. He did life with us. This convicts me. Like I said, I'm not sure where the Lord will take my husband and I in the following years. The gospel can be lived out among any race and God receives glory in a million different ways. We just have to pray and listen for His leading in our lives.

A few passages of scripture that God showed me over the trip was Deuteronomy 24 & Leviticus 19 which both say, regarding our finances, (in summary),
"You shall not pervert the justice due to the sojourner or to the fatherless, or take a widow’s garment in pledge, but you shall remember that you were a slave in Egypt and the LORD your God redeemed you from there; therefore I command you to do this."When you reap your harvest in your field and forget a sheaf in the field, you shall not go back to get it. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow, that the LORD your God may bless you in all the work of your hands. When you beat your olive trees, you shall not go over them again. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow. When you gather the grapes of your vineyard, you shall not strip it afterward. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow. You shall remember that you were a slave in the land of Egypt; therefore I command you to do this."

2 Corinthians 5:17-21 "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God."

I'm learning to do this in small ways: smiling more at people, calling the waiter/waitress/cashier by their first name. This is "Christ" to people. We love because He first loved us.

That is all.

Fourth of July weekend & my birthday

2011-07-06T15:16:00.000-04:00

We flew down to Boynton Beach to visit my family for the 4th of July weekend. D.R. & I both had 4 day weekends so we took advantage of it. It was a refreshing time of catching up with childhood friends, drinking coffee with my mom & dad, going shopping with Granny, mom & Kirstie and enjoying the beach and the food. I've said it before but I am blessed to be from such a beautiful city.

There are a few things I can always count on when we go to my hometown. 1.) There is always lots of what I call "God-talk". Between mom, dad, Kirstie, Aaron, D.R., Buddy and I there is a lot of discussion of the Bible, of books we've been reading, of theology, of sermons we've heard recently or just plain giving thanks for this or that. It is so encouraging to be around people who want to talk about the goodness and justice of God. I always learn a lot. The second thing I can always count on is 2.) capturing moments on camera. I look forward to all the great photos my dad will take when we're together. He's the reason I remember so much of my childhood. There are literally....and I'm not kidding....... 36 VHS videos 2hr long each of "Danelle & Kirstie" videos. Every birthday, every Christmas, every recital or cheerleading event, every vacation,... is captured on video. It's a treasure. I always watch at least one "Danelle & Kirstie" when I go home. (poor D.R. and now Aaron) Kirstie & I love them!!! They are hilarious. We love to reminisce. The third thing I can always count on is lots of love and affection. My family will hug the life out of you. It's just how we express our gratitude or affection. We're not afraid to hug a waitress or pastor or nail salon person for their service. LOL (especially not Granny) Home is a treasure. I'm thankful we got to go for a few days.

Tuesday was my 27th birthday and I felt very celebrated. D.R. bought us tickets to see Wicked in Atlanta in September. I've been talking about Wicked for a long time and I am soooooo excited to see it in a few months! My family got me a Carvel ice cream cake (per my humble request). It was divine! The perfect summer birthday treat. My favorite part is the crunchy chocolately bits in the center! yum! They also got me a very pretty Brighton belt, a locket with our picture in it and helped pay our airfare.
My husband. He's great. I feel so immensely thankful for him lately. He has been so thoughtful, kind and loving in the last year and our marriage is so much richer because of it. (thank you Lord) He knows how much I love cards so he always gets one for me. I have to share this one with you. It made me cry instantly.

and the inside

You probably can't read his writing but he says, "I have grown to love you more over the years-more love as I have been matured by God. When I think of you, I am most thankful. God has blessed me with a smart, kind, thoughtful, and beautiful wife that can only be covered up, masked, or forgotten by sin. I commit to work harder on our marriage than the last year so that our love is stronger next year. I love you, D.R."

He's right, only sin can make us forget how wonderful our spouse is.

Anyways, I hope it was a great 4th for everyone! We are so blessed to live in the US of A!

The Love of God- a difficult subject

2011-06-28T10:36:00.000-04:00

I'm currently reading a book on the topic of the love of God. "The Difficult Doctrine of the Love of God" by D.A. Carson. It is a short 93 pager and it is jam-packed with solid theological exposition on all the many facets of what "God's love" means. This has become a controversial topic among friends of mine (believing & unbelieving alike). I'm half way through and I started at 9pm last night. I can't wait to finish it. It strives to answer questions like, "Does God only love His elect?" "Does God love the world and in what context is it used in Jn 3:16?" "Is an unbeliever incapable of love as God defines it?" "Is God a god of love? a god of justice? or both?" "Should I fear the love of God?" "How do I reconcile God's love/sovereignty with man's sinful choices?" I have battled over many of these questions and this book does an impressive job of clearing up some error in my thinking on this topic. I highly recommend it if you are struggling with any of these thoughts. Struggle is good! I'm reminded of that when I find myself pouring over the Word in confusion. Struggle draws me to the Truth- to God. I'm so thankful for that. D.A. Carson's book is available in pdf form online for free. Take advantage of it and read it!

Monkey's Uncle Banana Creme

2011-06-27T21:06:00.000-04:00

This recipe is from the blog, Eat 80/20 and it is sooo good. If you're a banana lover like me you'll adore this healthy banana dessert. Here's how you do it:

Chop up 3 ripe bananas and place in a lightly sprayed baking dish.
Place in freezer for 2 hours. Scrape bananas into a food processor
and add 4 tbsps of almond or plain milk. Blend for about 3 minutes
until consistency is soft-serve like. Garish with whatever your heart
desires. I used sliced almonds, coconut, and heath bar bits. A yummy
summer treat and a great way to get some potassium.:)

Caprese Chicken

2011-06-20T10:52:00.001-04:00

This blog post is about food! One of my many loves. There's this salad I make all the time when I'm craving something really light and yummy. It's super simple and delicious. Caprese salad. 5 ingredient fix:fresh, sliced mozzarella, fresh basil, Roma tomatoes, balsamic vinegar, extra virgin olive oil. Done. We eat a whole lot of chicken in the McNew house. It's my favorite meat and you can season it a million different ways. I have no clue why I didn't think to put the caprese ingredients over chicken. Well this weekend I remedied that. I made caprese chicken on Saturday night when we had our friends Eric & Bridget over. D.R. & Eric are great friends and meet regularly for Bible study together. Eric is a Srgt 1st Lieu. in the Army and a fairly new believer. It's been a sweet friendship for the guys. Eric teaches D.R. about the Army & D.R. teaches Eric about the Bible. Although, D.R. says he's learning just as much during their time together. Bridget is a precious friend. We hit it off when we moved here last Sept. She loves all the same things I do: eating healthy, drinking wine, cooking, running, fashion. We're soul-sisters really. She is a fairly new believer as well and has such a vulnerable, teachable heart. Her excitement for the gospel and Bible stories is so child-like and refreshing.

Bridget is gluten-intolerant so it was a task to find a totally gluten-free meal. Luckily Publix has a "guide to gluten-free" pamphlet that helped this sister out. I learned that I am so thankful I do not have celiacs disease (like poor Bridget) and that my body is able to digest gluten.

So here is the recipe:

chicken, basil, mozzarella, baby tomatoes, red onion, balsamic vinegar, evoo, salt & pepper

dice mozz, tomatoes, basil & onion

add extra virgin olive oil

add vinegar and mix to coat all ingredients

brush chicken with evoo, s&p and grill lightly for 4 minutes on each side. Finish it off in the oven; 375 for 15 minutes until cooked through.

Bridget brought dessert: healthy pear & apple cobbler. no sugar added surprisingly. she made the crust her own gluten-free way with minced almonds/pecans, cinnamon, un-sweetened coconut, dried dates & figs. a trail mix crust if you will. we had a scoop of vanilla ice cream with it to add some sugar :) it was delightful.

5x7 Folded Card

2011-06-17T23:58:00.001-04:00

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McNew update

2011-06-16T14:10:00.000-04:00

per Lauren McCaghren's facebook request :) here is an update on the McNews.

For those of you that don't know, God provided a job for D.R. back in September at an urgent care clinic in Columbus, GA. We packed up in Mobile, AL and headed east on August 31. We were extremely thankful that God provided a job for D.R. so quickly after his graduation in July. After applying to over 100 jobs and being rejected or not even considered due to his Nat'l Guard status, we had almost given up hope of finding a job. God is faithful. The P.A. that hired D.R. is retired Army and actually hired him BECAUSE of his enrollment in the Nat'l Guard. He viewed it as a positive: that he was a hard-worker, devoted, loyal and conservative :) We were thankful. Over time D.R. became frustrated and stressed with the nature of the job. Urgent care clinics are unpredictable. You never know what will come through the door. With the wide-variety of illnesses and situations, he started feeling more and more dependent on the doc's for answers and less and less confident in himself as a P.A. I hated this for him. Every time he walked in the door I would see that look of exhaustion and defeat. It made my heart sink. But D.R., being the man he is, was always determined to improve and get better; only the nature of the job really doesn't allow for that if you are not used to total inconsistency. We spent many days praying that if God wanted D.R. to be somewhere else, then He would open the door in time. It happened while D.R. was at drill in March. ("Drill" is his monthly commitment as a P.A. in the Nat'l Guard to go to an army clinic and do physicals. He remained with the AL Nat'l Guard so he drilled in Birmingham) He met a man who works on Fort Benning, the army post in Columbus. This man told him that there was a P.A. position coming available in a certain battalion and would he be interested. Well of course he was. When we got home, the man that formerly held D.R.'s position called him and asked if he wanted to come on post and check it out. He did and felt an excitement about the possibility of working full-time for the Army. After a couple months, they offered him the job. It wasn't an easy thing to tell the urgent care clinic that he would be leaving but we both felt God had provided this new job which would really benefit us as a couple. This new job is wonderful all the way around! It's a higher pay, more consistent hours which allow D.R. to always be at church on Sundays and small group on Wednesdays, it's less stressful as his patients are all army men and women whom he has health profiles on and it allows him to create his own schedule which he is really enjoying. His busiest hours are in the morning from 6:30-9:30. Then depending on the day, he may have lots of free time to himself. He said he plans to work-out everyday, read, learn Spanish on Rosetta Stone and moonlight at different places once in a while. Sounds like a great job! D.R.'s hours are 6:30-3:30/4:00 M-F and once in a while on Sat/Sun from 3:30a-7:30a (i know crazy) during a road march test. (where the guys run a ga-zillion miles in full army gear in the 90 degree heat...D.R. is pretty useful during those shifts) So all in all, we are so thankful that God provided this new job for D.R. He is so passionate about being in the Army and serving his country by helping these men and woman be in optimal physical health. He's definitely been a more relaxed D.R. since starting this job last Friday. He's laughing more, singing more (yes, he's always singing or whistling around the house) and I love it. Plus, he looks so hot when he gets home everyday in his fatigues! rawr!!

As for me, I took a job back in April as High School Administrative Assistant at Calvary Christian School. I love it! I currently work part-time 9-1 M-Th and that's been stellar summer hrs! I have loved getting to know the students and the teachers and really look forward to them being back in the fall. The job is challenging as I wear so many hats. I really can't name all the tasks/responsibilities but I love them all. It's definitely the most challenging job I have held and for that I am thankful. I feel so blessed to be able to work and minister in the same place with teenagers- which are my heart! I love them and their messy lives! Many of them have been such an encouragement to me so far b/c I can tell they love Christ. I know God will teach me so much being at Calvary.

Champ McNew is doing super. He just turned 3 on May 22 and is healthy as can be. I give him lots of exercise, probably too much. D.R. & I truly love him. He's our child. Forreal. He's such a sweetheart; he still thinks he's a 16 lbs puppy and will crawl in our laps. ouch!! 80 lbs later doesn't feel so good! He's a joy in our lives and it's neat that D.R. & I love something together.

D.R. & I look forward to what this next year will bring. Talk of starting a family, taking a big trip somewhere far away, pursuing further education....who knows! We'll keep you updated. :)

Eat 80/20

2011-06-16T10:10:00.000-04:00

My new favorite food blog is http://www.eat8020.com/ She shares 80 recipes- which are healthy and 20 recipes- which are indulgent and just plain yummy. Her recipes are fun, semi-easy, & "healthy-lifestyle-encouraging". :) Check her out.

my idea of a perfect day

2011-06-15T17:12:00.000-04:00

I was sitting here pondering what to blog about and my mind kept drifting to things like....i need to do my buns&thighs work-out... OH, I think Giada is on right now... champ needs to be walked.... wonder if chicken is on sale this week at Publix?.... i miss the beach.... dang I love Adele.... So I thought, why don't I blog about what I'd love to do if I could do all my favorite things in one day.

here is my idea of a perfect day:

I wake up between 7:30-8:00 and have one cup of coffee, pulpy orange juice, a bowl of toasted oats cereal with bananas & blueberries and almond milk.

Then I get my sweat on: a 30 minute run followed by some weights. Shower (or not...who am I kidding. I would love to live in nike shorts and a tank!) Grab my Bible and Champ and head to the park. Take champ for a walk around the lake. Read in the car for a while. Go to Publix, buy ingredients for a yummy salad. Go home and make the salad and watch Giada. Call Kirstie and catch up on life. Laugh, cry, pray, miss her and my family. Take a bike ride with D.R. when he gets home. Take dinner to the park and grill out. Enjoy each other's company. Take a dip in the pool when we get back (because it's hot!). Play with champ. Watch a netflix movie and eat popcorn. Turn in by 11:00.

I'm lucky enough to have those days once in a while. Life is good. God is good. I haven't a thing to complain about. That's all.

homemade pizza and homemade granola

2011-06-12T15:25:00.000-04:00

I had a weekend of baking and I didn't even get to two of the things I wanted to make. It's probably a good thing: money-wise.

First, I made "stone" Margherita pizza. I had it at my friends, Chelsey & Zach's and it honestly is the best pizza I've ever had. Plus you get to choose your own ingredients, monitor the salt & fat content, yada yada... it's awesome! If you own a stone, use it!
Here's what you need:

-italian pizza dough by Publix. It's over in the bakery section kept in a mini-fridge. It gives you enough to make 2 thin crust or one hearty, thick crust pizza. It's flippin' delicious dough.
-one can of Dei Fratelli organic pizza sauce: so yummy and fat free
-fresh basil or gourmet garden basil spread (it's got a little olive oil & is pesto-like in consistency)
-fresh mozzarella cheese and shredded mozzarella cheese. The fresh really makes an incredible difference. It's worth the few extra bucks.
-oregano, garlic pepper & sea salt
-light italian olive oil to brush on to crust

Bake at 390 for 20-30 minutes

Homemade Granola:

-4 cups old-fashioned oats
-1 cup flaked coconut
-1/2 cup wheat germ
-2 tbsp flax seed
-1/2 cup sliced almonds
-1 &1/2 tsp salt
-1 & 1/2 tsp cinnamon
-1/2 cup vegetable oil
-1/4 cup brown sugar
-1/3 cup honey
-1/3 cup water
-1 tbsp vanilla extract
-1/2 cup golden raisins, dried cranberries &/or chopped dried fruit
In a large bowl, combine the first 7 ingredients; mix well. In a saucepan, cook oil, brown sugar, honey, water and vanilla until sugar is dissolved. Pour over dry ingredients and mix well. Spoon to a greased 13in. x 9in. x 2in. baking pan. Bake at 275 degrees for 1 hour or until golden, stirring every 15 minutes. Cool completely. Stir in dried fruit.

heavy & light

2011-06-12T14:49:00.000-04:00

first the heavy:

I cried today in church thinking about what God saved me from. It's not often that I ponder the present agony of the unbelieving who have died but today I did. There are a few people in my own family whom I can't be confident trusted in Christ before they died. What a horrible, horrible thought. I deserve what they are receiving right now. I am no better. Only, God saw fit to spare me. To spare D.R. To spare Kirstie, my sister and her husband Aaron. To spare my cousin-in-laws Grace Frye & Betty Morris and their husbands.And others... All because of Christ. Who would I be without Christ? To think of not being able to have fellowship with God on a daily basis- to not be able to stop in my car and talk to my Abba when I'm fearful or frustrated- to not know the deep covenant intimacy in marriage that only knowing Christ can provide- to not know that when natural disasters like hurricanes, tornados, mudslides and earthquakes happen that there is One who is still in sovereign control of it all. He is the only source of peace.

dangit! I'm crying again. He's such a big God. We don't understand Him. I'm so glad I don't. He is a glorious, wonderful mystery. And the thing is....no one, of their own accord, has even TRIED to understand Him. "None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God. All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one." Romans 13:11-12

We sang this song today. It has a somber, funeral-like mood but it is so powerful. I cry and am hardly able to sing all the way through once it hits me: how powerful, mighty and fear-worthy our God is.

"Let all mortal flesh keep silence,
And with fear and trembling stand;
Ponder nothing earthly minded,
For with blessing in His hand,
Christ our God to earth descendeth,
Our full homage to demand.

King of kings, yet born of Mary,
As of old on earth He stood,
Lord of lords, in human vesture,
In the body and the blood;
He will give to all the faithful
His own self for heavenly food.

Rank on rank the host of heaven
Spreads its vanguard on the way,
As the Light of light descendeth
From the realms of endless day,
That the powers of hell may vanish
As the darkness clears away.

At His feet the six wingèd seraph,
Cherubim with sleepless eye,
Veil their faces to the presence,
As with ceaseless voice they cry:
'Alleluia, Alleluia
Alleluia, Lord Most High!;"

On a lighter note, I made some really good pizza and granola (not eaten in the same meal) this weekend. I'll post the recipes and pics soon. :)

who calls who to worship?

2011-06-07T11:53:00.000-04:00

At our church we sing from the Trinity pca hymnal. On occasion we will sing an RUF (reformed university fellowship) song and they are hymn-like. At first I couldn't sing along because I couldn't understand the old language used in that century. So I just read, and God opened my heart to the beauty and reverance of hymns. I grew up singing hymns from the Baptist Hymnal; songs like 'The Old Rugged Cross', 'How Great Thou Art' and 'When the Roll is Called Up Yonder'. There is a new depth in the hymns we sing now at our church. They help train my heart to worship God- not just sing notes on a page. The words are deep, convicting, sobering and truly glorifying to God. I grew up hearing "and now let us open our hymnals to page ____ and we ask the Holy Spirit to come into this place as we worship." A few years back I learned that is not at all what worship- Biblical worship- is like. We do not ask the Holy Spirit to come. The Holy Spirit is ever-present in the hearts & lives of the elect. When we join in corporate worship our "calling" should be focused towards our own rebel hearts. My heart is rarely in the correct place to worship a holy God so I must pray and ask that God align my heart with the Holy Spirit so that I can give glory to Him through my worship. It completely changes the way I worship. Now, when I feel my heart drifting I know that it's not the Holy Spirit that is still "not present". It's my "prone to wander" heart that I need to address. Like a child that gets off task in school, my heart needs constant shepherding. And He is always faithful to hear my prayer and give me the faith I need to worship in spirit and in truth.

Here is one of my favorite hymns:

471: "Tis not that I did choose thee" by Josiah Conder (1836)

'Tis not that I did choose thee,
For, Lord, that could not be;
This heart would still refuse thee,
Hadst thou not chosen me.
Thou from the sin that stained me
Hast cleansed and set me free;
Of old thou hast ordained me,
That I should live to thee.

'Twas sov'reign mercy called me
And taught my op'ning mind;
The world had else enthralled me,
To heav'nly glories blind.
My heart owns none before thee,
For thy rich grace I thirst;
This knowing, if I love thee,
Thou must have loved me first.

There is a reason that for centuries we have used these words and other like them to express our love for our Savior. They are deep calling to deep through which the soul awakens to revel in the love of God for whom we have been made.

5x7 Folded Card

2011-06-04T21:04:00.001-04:00

Birthday Sketch Birthday 5x7 folded card

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Why Low Carb Diets Fail For The Anaerobic Athlete

2011-05-25T12:15:00.000-04:00

A great article by nutritionist & Pure Barre student Alex M. Fioroni:

What does the word “Anaerobic” mean and how does this affect the way I eat?

Well let’s look at the basic science of what this means and really get to the bottom of the way we look at a carbohydrate in regards to an active anaerobic exerciser Anaerobic basically means exercise without oxygen as the main source of energy. Guess what the number one source of fuel/energy is for an anaerobic exerciser? “Glycogen”…meaning glucose..meaning carbohydrates.

Now that we know that sugar (carbohydrate), (obviously the right kind and the right amount) is the number one fuel for an exerciser that trains like an anaerobic athlete, lets really define what kind of exerciser that is.

Basically if you are working out or playing a sport that consists of quick energy burst that last under 2 minutes and have periodic rests in between, you are classified as an anaerobic exerciser.

Example: Pure Barre workouts, weight training, lacrosse, football, hockey, golf, baseball, boxing, martial arts, etc. As you can see these are not only sports or recreational sports that individuals use to get in shape or to keep in shape but are some of the most common professional sports.

Now if carbohydrates are the number one fuel for an anaerobic exerciser then you can see why, when it comes to nutrition, sugar is so important. I keep saying the word sugar because I want you to realize that is what a carbohydrate is. Here in our society the wrong types of sugars and LARGE amounts of sugars per servings that we tend to eat have caused many illnesses. At the end of the day, sugar used in moderation and balanced with the correct ratios is more powerful for our body than the illnesses that are being created from unhealthy use of sugar.

If one does a low carb diet and trains like an anaerobic athlete the only loss of weight that will happen will be YOUR MUSCLE and the only gain will be irritability and low energy!!
The key is learning what types of carbohydrates are powerful enough to generate a high metabolism and ingesting the correct amount of grams every 2-3 hours. Sugar is what feeds the muscle. Sugar also feeds the brain. The average person needs at least 20 grams of sugar just for the brain to function for a couple of hours.

We get caught up in the “hype” of these fade diets not because they work but because we get caught in the quick fix approach due to the fact that we have bad habits that we do not know how to change.

The great thing is that you can and you will. You just need the right tools and the right coach and you will be in better shape and feel better than you could ever dream of.

Be smart, take your time, and enjoy what nutrition and proper science can do for your health and your future!

Romans 1 & Lady Gaga

2011-05-23T12:04:00.000-04:00

I hear her lyrics in the hallways of the Christian school that I work at and I'm saddened. True, she is an icon in the music world; an "idol", a "role-model" for this generation. But boy is she the wrong kind. I will admit that I have used several of her songs as part of my warm-ups in dance classes but this last release of hers has sent it over the edge for me. After studying Romans for the past 8+ months with my church, I truly began to grasp the sovereignty of God. I mean, I preach it all the time but it really sank in to my heart deeper as I read the theological masterpiece that is Romans. The reality that God chooses to reveal His truth to some & save them is so humbling. The reality that God chooses not to save some is humbling. He is just; He is good; because of Christ. Lady Gaga is in darkness. Her mind has deliberately been darkened (as all of ours were once). She knows the truth-- that God is good and in control but suppresses this truth. (as all non-believers do) What's sad about Gaga is how she flaunts her knowledge and rebellion against a holy God. I dread her inevitable fate if God does not regenerate her heart. While she prances around dressed as a condom, or as a female "Christ" or as a hooker or some kind of sex toy, the truth is buried underneath. Here are the lyrics to her newest song, "Judas".

Oh-oh-oh-ohoo
I'm in love with Juda-as, Juda-as

When he comes to me, I am ready
I'll wash his feet with my hair if he needs
Forgive him when his tongue lies through his brain
Even after three times, he betrays me

I'll bring him down, bring him down, down
A king with no crown, king with no crown

I'm just a Holy fool, oh baby he's so cruel
But I'm still in love with Judas, baby
I'm just a Holy fool, oh baby he's so cruel
But I'm still in love with Judas, baby

Oh-oh-oh-ohoo
I'm in love with Juda-as, Juda-as

I couldn't love a man so purely
Even darkness forgave his goofy way
I've learned love is like a brick,
you can build a house or sink a dead body
I'll bring him down, bring him down, down
A king with no crown, king with no crown

In the most Biblical sense,I am beyond repentance
Fame hooker, prostitute wench, vomits her mind but in the cultural sense
I just speak in future tense
Judas kiss me if offensed, or wear ear condom next time

I wanna love you, but something's pulling me away from you
Jesus is my virtue, Judas is the demon I cling to."

phew, now to come out of the pit and into the light....

Romans 1:16-25 says: "I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith,as it is written, "The righteous shall live by faith." For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth. For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. Claiming to be wise, they became fools, and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things. Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator."

I can be gangsta (so can my husband)

2011-05-21T17:47:00.000-04:00

I really can't say enough about how amazing our youth group is at our church. D.R. & I volunteer with them every Sunday and we feel so blessed to be involved in such awesome kid's lives. Here is a sample of our youth movie that we just finished and premiered last night. "O Charter, Where Art Thou?" will be in theaters soon.

No, just kidding. But it is fabulous and our kids (and our stellar youth pastor, Zach) are to thank.

Enjoy our music video of Rebel/Identity:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRNAcbjb2do

John Piper

2011-05-09T09:40:00.000-04:00

This is why I have the utmost respect for him and his ministry.

http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/taste-see-articles/john-pipers-upcoming-leave

5x7 Folded Card

2011-05-06T14:37:00.001-04:00

Happy Day Pink Mother's Day 5x7 folded card

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baptizō & baptô

2011-04-27T14:58:00.000-04:00

One of the subjects in Scripture that has always been confusing to me is the subject of baptism and the context(s) it is used in. Like in Mark 16:16, is that literal in meaning or symbolic? In Acts 1:5, what is meant by the baptism of the Holy Spirit?

I found this commentary on Blue Letter Bible and it really helped but I still have questions. (By the way, this website is very helpful for learning the original meaning of the text. It provides the Hebrew and Greek lexicon/concordance for each word in scripture. Talk about expository!)

{The word baptizō should not be confused with baptô. The clearest example that shows the meaning of baptizo is a text from the Greek poet and physician Nicander, who lived about 200 B.C. It is a recipe for making pickles and is helpful because it uses both words. Nicander says that in order to make a pickle, the vegetable should first be 'dipped' (baptô) into boiling water and then 'baptised' (baptizô) in the vinegar solution. Both verbs concern the immersing of vegetables in a solution. But the first is temporary. The second, the act of baptising the vegetable, produces a permanent change.}

more thoughts on this later....

how wonderful to be a daughter of the Most High!

2011-04-27T10:35:00.001-04:00

I found this on my church's website and was so encouraged. It's good to be reminded of all we have in Christ and all He has mercifully saved us from. It's long but worth reading.

Statement of the Reformed Faith

By B.B. Warfield

I believe that God, since the creation of His world, has plainly revealed through the things He has made His eternal power and divine nature, and the requirements of His law, so that there is no excuse for unbelief or disobedience on the part of any man; yet however glorious this revelation, it is not sufficient to give that knowledge of God, and of His will, which is necessary for salvation.

I believe that my one aim in life and death should be to glorify God and enjoy Him forever; and that God teaches me how to glorify and enjoy Him in His inerrant Word, that is, the Bible, which He has given by the infallible inspiration of His Holy Spirit in order that I may certainly know what I am to believe concerning Him and what duty He requires of me.

I believe that the whole counsel of God concerning all things necessary for His own glory, man’s salvation, faith and life, is either expressly set down in Scripture, or by good and necessary consequence may be deduced from Scripture; unto which nothing at any time is to be added, whether by alleged new revelations of the Spirit or by traditions of men.

I believe that God authenticated His prophets and apostles as agents of revelation by mighty acts of His power employed by Him as signs whereby all men should confess, concerning those who are gifted with such power, “We know you are a teacher sent from God, for no one could do the things you do lest God were with Him”; and I believe that the great outpouring of such miracles displayed in the ministry of Christ and His Apostles signified the breaking into history of God’s promised kingdom, which kingdom, when established in its fullness, will issue in the miraculous renewal of all creation; and that until such time, God is at work bringing men and women into that kingdom through the supernatural work of regeneration.

I believe that because God has completed His revelation in Jesus Christ, the former ways of revealing His will are now ceased; and because the final and manifest establishment of His kingdom is yet to come, God does not now choose to publicly display His miraculous power. Nevertheless I believe that God is directly upholding and governing His creation, moment by moment; that God faithfully supplies the needs of His people through His constant providential care; and that He often blesses them with special providences wherein He strengthens their faith and displays His special love for them to the world.

I believe that God is a Spirit, infinite, eternal, and unchangeable, in His being, wisdom, power, holiness, justice, goodness and truth; incomparable in all that He is; one God but three persons, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost, my Creator, my Redeemer, and my Sanctifier; in whose power, wisdom, righteousness, goodness, and truth I may safely put my trust.

I believe that God has all life, glory, goodness, and blessedness, in and of Himself; and is alone in and unto Himself all-sufficient, not standing in need of me, or deriving any glory from me, but only manifesting His own glory in, by, unto, and upon me in Christ Jesus; and that He has most sovereign dominion over me, to do by me, for me, or upon me whatsoever He pleases.

I believe that God from all eternity, did, by the most wise and holy counsel of His own will, freely and unchangeably ordain whatsoever comes to pass; yet thereby neither is God the author of sin, nor is violence done to the will of the creature; and trusting in the decree of God, I who am called according to His purpose, I may be assured that all things will work together for my good.

I believe that the heavens and the earth, and all that in them is, are the works of God’s hands; and that all that He has made He directs and governs in all their actions, so that they fulfill the end for which they were created, and I who trust in Him shall not be put to shame, but may rest securely in the protection of His almighty love. <

I believe that God created man after His own image, in knowledge, righteousness, and holiness, and that all men owe their Creator thanksgiving and worship; yet God condescended, making a covenant with man, that men might know God, not just as Creator, but as their blessedness and reward. And I believe that while the requirement of this covenant, originating under Adam, was obedience, God was pleased, according to His wise and holy counsel, to permit him to disobey, having purposed to order it to His own glory; so that it was by willfully sinning against God that I, in Adam, lost the rewards of a covenant keeper, and suffer the curses due a covenant breaker. Therefore my only hope of salvation is that Christ the second Adam, has kept the covenant, securing its rewards for the elect, among whom by grace I am numbered.

I believe that, being fallen in Adam, my first father, I am by nature a child of wrath, under the condemnation of God and corrupted in body and soul, prone to evil and liable to eternal death; from which dreadful state I cannot be delivered save through the unmerited grace of God my Savior.

I believe that God has not left the world to perish in its sin, but out of the great love wherewith He has loved it, has from all eternity graciously chosen unto Himself a multitude which no man can number, to deliver them out of their sin and misery, and of them to build up again in the world His kingdom of righteousness; in which kingdom I may be assured I have my part, if I hold fast to Christ the Lord.

I believe that God has redeemed His people unto HimseIf through Jesus Christ our Lord; who, though He was and ever continues to be the eternal Son of God, yet was born of a woman, born under the law, that He might redeem them that are under the law; I believe that He bore the penalty due to my sins in His own body on the tree, and fulfilled in His own person the obedience I owe to the righteousness of God, and now presents me to His Father as His purchased possession, to the praise of the glory of His grace forever; wherefore renouncing all merit of my own, put all my trust only in the blood and righteousness of Jesus Christ my redeemer.

I believe that Jesus Christ my redeemer, who died for my offenses was raised again for my justification, and ascended into the heavens, where He sits at he right hand of the Father Almighty continually making intercession for his people, and governing the whole world as head over all things for His Church; so that I need fear no evil and may surely know that nothing can snatch me out of His hands and nothing can separate me from His love.

I believe that the redemption wrought by the Lord Jesus Christ is effectualy applied to all His people by the Holy Spirit, who works faith in me and thereby unites me to Christ, renews me in the whole man after the image of God, and enables me more and more to die unto sin and to live unto righteousness; until His gracious work having been completed in me, I shall be received into glory; in which great hope abiding, I must ever strive to perfect holiness in the fear of God.

I believe that God requires of me, under the gospel, first of all, that, out of a true sense of my sin and misery and apprehension of His mercy in Christ, I should turn with grief and hatred away from sin and receive and rest upon Jesus Christ alone for salvation; that, so being united to Him, I may receive pardon for my sins and be accepted as righteous in God’s sight, only for the righteousness of Christ imputed to me and received by faith alone; thus, and thus only, do I believe I may be received into the number and have a right to all the privileges of the sons of God.

I believe that, having been pardoned and accepted for Christ’s sake, it is further required of me that I walk in the Spirit whom He has purchased for me, and by whom love is shed abroad in my heart; fulfilling the obedience I owe to Christ my King; faithfully performing all the duties laid upon me by the holy law of God my heavenly Father; and ever reflecting in my life and conduct the perfect example that has been set me by Christ Jesus my leader, who has died for me and granted to me His Holy Spirit that I may do the good works which God has afore prepared that I should walk in them.

I believe that God has established His Church in the world, one and the same in all ages, and now, under the Gospel, has endowed it with the ministry of the Word and the holy ordinances of Baptism, the Lord’s Supper and prayer; in order that through these means, the riches of His grace in the gospel may be known to the world, and by the blessing of Christ and the working of His Spirit in them that by faith receive them, the benefits of redemption may be communicated to His people; wherefore also it is required of me that I attend on these means of grace with diligence, preparation, and prayer, so that through them I may be instructed and strengthened in faith, and in holiness of life and in love; and that I use by best endeavors to carry this gospel and convey these means of grace to the whole world.

I believe that the visible Church consists of all those who are united to Christ, the Head of the Church, by profession of their faith, together with their children; and that the visible unity of the body of Christ, though obscured, is not destroyed by its division into different denominations of professing Christians. Therefore I believe that all of these which maintain the Word and Sacraments in their fundamental integrity are to be recognized as true branches of the Church of Jesus Christ.

I believe that God alone is Lord of the conscience and has left it free from the doctrines and commandments of men, which are in any respect contrary to His Word, or beside it in matters of faith or worship. I believe therefore, that the rights of private judgment in all matters that respect religion are universal and inalienable and that no religious constitution should be supported by the civil power, further than may be necessary for protection and security equal and common to all others.

I believe that the Church is God’s spiritual minister for the purpose of redemption and the state is God’s providential minister for the purpose of thisworldly order. The power of the Church is exclusively spiritual; that of the State includes the exercise of force. The constitution of the Church derives exclusively from divine revelation; the constitution of the State must be determined by human reason and the course of providential events. I believe therefore that the Church has no right to construct or modify a government for the State, and the State has no right to frame a creed or polity for the Church.

I believe that disciples of Jesus Christ are called to be His witnesses in the world, proclaiming the justice and mercy of God to all men, and making evident His wise and righteous rule over every aspect of human culture. Therefore it is my obligation to search the Scriptures with all the skills God has allotted me, and to seek, within the bounds of my calling, to apply my understanding of His Word to the entire created order, and to all the outworkings of His most wise providence. And I believe that it is my privilege and duty to pursue a vocation in this world that employs my gifts to the glory of God, and for the good of my family, my congregation, my community, and, as God brings opportunity, to any who may be in need.

I believe that as Jesus Christ has once come in grace, so also is He to come a second time in glory, to judge the world in righteousness and assign to each his eternal reward; the wicked shall have the fearful but just sentence of condemnation pronounced against them, wherein their consciences shall fully concur, and they shall be cast into hell, to be punished with unspeakable torments, both in body and soul, with the devil and his angels for ever. The righteous in Christ shall be caught up with Christ and there openly acknowledged and acquitted; shall be received into heaven, where they shall fully and forever be freed from all sin and misery; filled with inconceivable joys, made perfectly holy and happy in both body and soul, in the great company of all God’s saints and holy angels, but especially in the immediate vision of God the Father, of our Lord Jesus Christ, and of the Holy Spirit, to all eternity.

I believe that if I die in Christ, my soul shall be at death made perfect in holiness and go home to the Lord, and when He shall return in His majesty I shall be raised in glory and made perfectly blessed in the full enjoyment of God to all eternity; encouraged by which blessed hope, it is required of me willingly to take my part in suffering hardships here as a good soldier of Christ Jesus, being assured that if I die with Him I shall also live with Him, if I endure, I shall also reign with Him.

And to Him, my Redeemer,
with the Father,
and the Holy Spirit,
Three Persons, one God,
be glory forever, world without end,

my "old" home

2011-03-21T11:22:00.000-04:00

I went home for 6 days last week. It was a long, relaxing, enjoyable trip with my mom, dad, grandparents, sister & brother-in-law. Everyone but my husband, D.R. I shouldn't have gone away for so long. While I did enjoy myself, by day 4 I was ready to be back in Columbus, doing life as usual. It was a sweet realization that I am where God wants me to be. With D.R... wherever that may be. D.R. is home. Boynton Beach, Fl is not anymore. I am blessed to be from a place where it's 75 degrees 75% of the year. Where the beach is 10 minutes walking distance. Where the amazing shops & restaurants are endless. It's truly a vacation when I get to go "old" home.

I think my readers are my facebook friends so i won't upload photos cause they're already up on facebook. Go see em if you want! Some of my favorite parts of the trip were:

1) beachin' it with mom. She really is the perfect beach partner. She likes to do exactly what I like to do at the beach. Get sun, read and take long walks. We had a great time together talking about life, watching kids build sand creations (cause some of them were not recognizable, ha!), and just enjoying God's beauty in the beach. The beach puts me in a very peaceful place. The vastness is so wonderfully intimidating. I can't help but be reminded of God's power.

2) the food in Palm Beach county is off the hook. If you're a foodie, like me, this place is paradise. You've got everything your palate could ever desire; from fresh atlantic coast seafood & sushi to homemade gelatos & custards to over-sized portioned breakfast plates right on the ocean. My new favorite place to eat is Benny's on the Beach in Lake Worth, FL. Mom & I went there for brunch on Wednesday and it was delicious.

3) taking runs with my dad. Dad likes to exercise as much as I do and he's a great running buddy. I wish we lived close to do it all the time. We went one night at sunset to a local park and did a few miles. No chatting necessary, just sweaty togetherness.

4) being with Kirstie. It doesn't matter what we're doing: laying by her pool, running to get a smoothie, shopping at the Gardens mall or having coffee somewhere together. I love that girl. She grows up 5 years everytime I talk with her. She is married now so our talks are focused mainly on how we can be better wives and the challenges of marriage. She is a precious wife. I enjoyed watching her and Aaron interact. They adore eachother. She made awesome homemade (Wragg recipe) chocolate chip cookies and put flax seed in them. She whispered to me, "Aaron will never know they are a little healthy". :)

5) riding down A1A with the windows down. This is something I've loved to do since I got my license in 10th grade. There were numerous times when after I'd finished my homework and before dinner was ready, I'd ask my parents if I could go take a ride. 5:00/5:30 is the perfect time. I love looking at all the beautiful beach-side homes along A1A and smelling the salty breeze.

So that was my trip. I missed D.R. and champ a lot and don't want to be away from them again for that long. I came back to the exact same weather that I had in Boynton. It was awesome. I'm so ready for spring and summer! Enjoy your week!

New Hair

2011-03-04T18:06:00.000-05:00

as requested...

A Mish Mosh....

2011-02-22T16:43:00.000-05:00

Here's a run down of my life since Christmas:

I picked up my first C.S. Lewis book. Always been intimidated to read anything of his but I'm really enjoying The Screwtape Letters.

My sister got married to the love of her life, Aaron on January 22nd in Jupiter Fl. (pics and the sister-perspective post of their special day soon)

I chopped my hair off to above my shoulders and feel like a new woman. My hair has volume again!

I already achieved one of my NE Res's: lose 3 lbs. This made possible by publix brand ensure chocolate & vanilla health drinks, (and daily cardio which I'm lucky to have time for in my life right now-plus the weather has been beautiful- 74 most days so I'm very encouraged to get outside and walk or run)

I went on a women's retreat to Callaway Gardens and heard Mary Beth McGreevy speak on Sanctification. Amazing. My heart needed that refreshment.

Made the most delicious chowder by E-mealz. (check post below) Ask me if you want the recipe.

Began mentoring a sweet teenager named Cary. We meet on Saturday mornings and discuss a chunk of James. Fun facts about Cary: She's a talented oboe player & her grandfather started a kid discipleship camp called Marannook in Alabama.

Champ, my doggie, had a benign tumor on his hip removed. phew. I'm pretty sure Champ is one of my idols. I'd be heartbroken if he suddenly wasn't in our lives.

I became addicted to Edy's french silk ice cream. (Grace, it's got coffee in it, you'd LOVE it!)

Studying The Gospel in Life by Tim Keller in our small group and really loving it.

I began counselor training at a local crisis pregnancy clinic. This is a ministry I've always wanted to get involved in and now is the perfect time in my life to do so. God has a lot to teach me about presenting the gospel in simple terms. I've been stuck in my theological smokeroom for too long I fear. The gospel should always be something you can teach a 5 year old- but what a task enabled only by the Holy Spirit.

I've determined I need a hiatus from teaching dance. I'm getting burned out. I love to dance but the choreographing and teaching are becoming laborsome and that's not how it should be. I never want dance to seem like a burden. I think I may just take a class or two starting in the summer.....?

So that's me, lately, in a nutshell. D.R. & I are expecting a nice bonus check from the Nat'l Guard soon and we are excited to be able to pay off some loans and save for a trip. I wonder what Santorini, Greece is like this time of year? ha!

*Be thankful!*

and here are some pics from my relaxing day on the Morris Farm in Pine Mt, GA.

Isn't it a beautiful place?

shout out!

2011-01-13T15:35:00.000-05:00

i want to give a shout out to something that makes my life a little easier. It's the wonderfulness that is E-mealz. That's right, mealz with a Z, homeslice. That's how they roll. E-mealz is a meal-planning resource for...anyone really. Whether you have 6 kids or it's just you and your roommate, it's easy, cuts your grocery costs and has great variety. D.R. & I have been using e-mealz since August 26, 2007. (the day we got back from our honeymoon!) We spend $5/month on it and it helps us spend way less at the grocery store. E-mealz is committed to simple-to-prepare meals, that are cheap, healthy and a good variety. You don't have to pick low-fat meal plans. We just enjoy eating healthy. They let you pick from the nearest/favoritest grocery store near you and find the cheapest priced items for the meals. 85% of the time we love the meal and recycle the recipe to make again. I'll diverge from the list once in a while when a meal comes up that we aren't fond of but otherwise it has been really great. I have never made up my own grocery list. I never have to think about what's for dinner and I LOVE IT! So if you're looking for something a little easier than coming up with yummy, different meals each week, try it out.

the problem beneath the problem

2011-01-12T11:07:00.000-05:00

Hello again, blog friends! It's been a little while. I haven't had much to say lately because life has been so full and I've been busy living it! Christmas, New Years, weddings... so much life shared with family and friends lately. It's been wonderful. I can't believe it's 2011. I feel like I was just in Miami at my uncle's house, begging my mom for a sip of her champagne & ringing in Y2K my sophomore yr of h.s.! And now we're beginning a new decade. What will this one bring? In the last one, I've graduated h.s, received a degree from Samford University, married my best friend, become an aunt, and experienced being a homeowner. There is much to look forward to. In the next few weeks I will gain another brother-in-law and experience the sweet relationship of having a married sister to talk to. God has so graciously chosen Aaron for Kirstie and it's a beautiful match. He's been a precious addition to our family and become a true, dear friend of mine & D.R.'s. He's a zealous man of God and deeply loves His Word & the church. I'm confident that he will lead Kirstie well and with much humility and grace. He's the youngest of four children and like most babies in the family, he's learned from his older 3 siblings mistakes & successes. Aaron, if you ever read this, I am truly glad God chose you to be my sister's spouse. We love you and welcome you to the family!

I got to spend some quality time with my sister over New Years and hear her heart about wedding plans and thoughts on marriage. We both share the same struggle with our physical expectations. I know that God will use that struggle in her marriage to show her what's most important but I didn't quite know how to encourage her Biblically. When I got home and shared with D.R. the struggle that Kirstie & I both have he reminded me that the problem is not that she wants to be physically perfect for Aaron and is consumed with her appearance. The problem is her heart's perception of what Aaron deems most important. He said, "Kirstie has a sin problem. It's not that she needs to exercise less and eat more. She needs to understand what she's thinking about Aaron and how twisted it is. She is basically saying that all Aaron cares about is how hot his wife will look. Why would she want to marry a guy who is that shallow? Of course Aaron is not concerned with that stuff. He loves her heart. Her body is just a bonus. You need to remind Kirstie that she needs to beautify and strengthen her heart in preparation to be a wife; not her body."

um, wow. That's why I married D.R. He always puts things in Biblical perspective. Here I am telling Kirstie to just not be so concerned with how often she works out and "eat more meat, skinny one!" when her heart is totally in the wrong place. I'm really good at doing behavior modification and neglecting the heart issue. Kirstie (& I) both struggle with believing that our eternal value is found in Christ. We can easily obsess over how many squats we did/didn't do in a day and forget about cracking open God's word of life to exercise our heart. I'm so thankful that D.R. gave me a sermonette on all this. I personally needed it. My heart needs the sustenance of God's word- the pure milk of His truth. Not tighter thighs. (although that'd be nice, ha) I pray in 2011, I can be a woman who longs for time with my Savior in His Word. I want to drink in the truths that feed my soul and strengthen my heart towards Christ and away from sin. I want to love the things of God more (fellowship with saints, service, hospitality, mentorship, submission) and hate the vanities of this world. Oh how prone to wander, Lord I feel it. Prone to leave the God I love! Oh God, take my heart and seal it for the courts above.

I love the line from "Come Ye Sinners", one of my favorite hymns, that says,
"Let not conscience make you linger, nor of fitness fondly dream; All the fitness He requireth is to feel your need of Him." This is my prayer for Kirstie & I and anyone who struggles to think they must acheive something to be acceptable before God.

It's a Wonderful Life & I have a wonderful husband

2010-12-15T11:55:00.000-05:00

Last night, D.R. & I went downtown to the Springer Opera House to watch a showing of It's a Wonderful Life. It's one of our favorite Christmas movies and viewing it in an old opera theater is the only way to watch it. I have to say, I've watched that movie probably 7 times before and I've never been as touched as I was last night. I think it's easy to miss all the clever or important lines and sentimental looks when you're a teen.

I'm not married to a saint. D.R. has many flaws which he would admit but no one could ever say that my husband doesn't care about people and put others above himself. As I watched George Bailey help his younger brother out of the ice pond & keep the local drugist from going to jail for accidently putting poison in a child's prescription bottle & give up his dreams of college and world travel to take over the family bank/loan business; even skip his own honeymoon just to attend to a problem at the bank, I saw my husband's heart. So many times we have had plans that don't work out and D.R. handles them with such grace and trust that God knows best. He is the one who searches for charities to give to & started our Christmas tradition of filling two boxes for Samaritan's Purse. (one for a boy, one for a girl)

At one point in the movie, George is offered 8x the salary he is making if he'll work for Mr. Potter. (the mean, wealthy opposition in town/rival banker) George is tempted to take him up on it but to do so would mean Bailey Loan & Adjustments would close. He's captive to his conscience and rejects the offer with plenty of Bailey gumption. I cried at that part because I am not that way. I'm so lured by the riches of this world. I admit I feel comfortable with the salary God has provided us with through D.R.'s new job but I also feel like I deserve it. "Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. But you, [wo]man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith." I Timothy 6:9-12a Oh how quick my heart is to forget God's blessings. He's so good to me. D.R. is always reminding me of God's provision in uncertain times. It's something he mentions every time he prays. "And God thank you for always providing for us." I'm so thankful I have a thankful-hearted husband who seems material possessions for what they are....material, temporal. He would never champion me buying a new dress for each wedding we go to which is frustrating but sooo good for me. The truth is I could stand to give 1/2 dozen dresses away!

Hanging in the "Bailey Building and Loan" offices there was a picture that said, "The Only Thing You Can Take With You Are the Things that You Give Away." I pray I can live with this more in mind in 2011.

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

2010-12-09T11:45:00.000-05:00

I remember how magical Christmas was as a child.

My family and I would pick out Christmas music (usually Steven Curtis Chapman or Amy Grant) and drink Farmstores eggnog and decorate the tree. Ok, maybe we got distracted and let mom decorate the tree. I loved watching my dad string the colored lights on the roof, the columns, over the garage and in the bushes outside my bedroom window. I remember how good it smelled the first day we got our tree into the house. I remember, as I got a little older, and my belief in ol St. Nick was unsure, Kirstie & I would test his existence by laying out cookies and then asking him (through prayer I guess) if he would only eat one cookie. If he ate more than one, we would know he wasn't real. Well, Santa was always more hungry than we thought he'd be. I remember waking up at 6, 6:30, 6:50, 7:15, 7:40, 8:00!!!!! We couldn't get out of bed until 8. Dad would set up the tripod video camera, put on some coffee & music and we'd open presents. After that we'd call granny's house to wish them Merry Christmas and tell them to come over for breakfast. Mom's sausage,egg, hashbrown and cheese casserole with fresh fruit. Then it was off to granny's to open gifts under her tree. We'd hang out there till late afternoon then load up our loot and head home to work on Christmas dinner. We usually took a walk, rode a new bike or played with new toys while dinner was prepared. Christmas dinner was always an intimate affair. Dad, mom, me, Kirstie, granny, papa & uncle Ricky.
It became tradition once Kirstie and I were 9 or 10 to have our friends the Shoe family over for a Christmas movie later that night. They are dear friends of ours who are more like family. They have two girls, Jessica & Jamie and a boy, Jared. Another Christmas tradition that was started somewhere along the way, is going to Atlantic Ave in Delray Beach to see the big Christmas tree and take a picture in front of it. It's a beautiful tree and has Santa's workshop inside it. Kirstie has started a tradition of making monkey bread on or around Christmas day and it's something her future husband's mom has made for years. :)

I love Christmas. The smells, the sounds, the significance. And even though lots of songs on the radio are singing about sleigh rides and mistletoe, they all remind me that this is the most wonderful time of year because of our Savior. Jesus; Lord at Thy birth. What a magical thing to ponder! I love remembering how He came; humbly, quietly, peacefully. No trumpets or lit up sky to proclaim His birth. No warm mansion for such royalty to dwell in. A cold, damp stable filled with animals and all their sanitary-ness. I love being reminded that Christ was man; pleased with men as man to dwell; Jesus our Emmanuel.

And while I love giving and receiving gifts, drinking hot cider & singing the holiday tunes, my favorite part is being still and pondering that little baby. That Holy baby whose cry was so tender and mild. That baby who came for me. Who came for you. That baby who even at birth could save the souls of men. I love Him. I'm so thankful for His gift. He knew my name even while laying in that manger. He knew my sin and my sorrow. He knew my heart's longings.

I love the lines in this song by Downhere,
"How many kings, stepped down from their thrones?
How many lords have abandoned their homes?
How many greats have become the least for me?
How many Gods have poured out their hearts
To romance a world that has torn all apart?
How many fathers gave up their sons for me?
Only one did that for me"

Much to be Thankful For

2010-11-28T20:06:00.000-05:00

Here are some highlights from our Thanksgiving weekend with my family.

We ate frozen yogurt when it was 30 degrees outside.

We took a stroll downtown Columbus.

We sat around one of my uncle Ben's beautifully decorated Christmas trees.

We feasted.

My flowergirl, Ella Claire & her mom, Tiff.

My ringbearer, Mason and Jackson, the polar bear.

We posed.

We went to the Original Chick-Fil-A in Hapeville, GA aka "The Dwarf House". The menu was amazing. Fresh veggies, pies, burgers, additional salads. Awesome experience.

We took a freezing boat ride on Lake Lanier.

We danced in the bedroom :)

I'm thankful for my family. Each and every one of them. I'm thankful for Christ and the love He has put in my heart for my family. I have more than most people could ask for and far more than I deserve.

And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. Colossians 3:14-16

The Gospel & Porn

2010-11-20T21:12:00.000-05:00

All credit goes to Scott Moore,
Assistant Pastor at Grace Community Church
Mobile, AL

I am quite aware that even bringing up the subject can cause some to wonder down the porn path. That's how enticing it is. But I must communicate the dangers of this horrible medium. WE must speak up. The snowball is rolling downhill fast. It has been gaining exponential speed ever since pornographic material was invited into the home with the simple click of a mouse.

It seems that the only ones communicating honestly about the abuse of sex are the secular artists. With their words, images and expressions, they reach down into our innermost beings and call our sinful flesh to feast at their table. And they are good at it. While at the gym the other day, not only did I pass by the front desk with an issue of MAXIM magazine in full display; but I also found my head bobbing to the lyrics, "I kissed a girl and I liked it..." WHAT THE HECK!

Again, the snowball is rolling fast. And its getting larger. It is difficult to go anywhere or listen to anything without getting bombarded. Sure, there is Christian television and radio...but I don't want to go there. Most of it, though "clean" is only superficially so. We go there only to find that the pendulum has swung to the other side. This get's us nothing but a new Pharisaical friend. What we really need is the gospel, which powerfully embraces the entire clock with redemptive arms.

The gospel is not afraid of sex - nor is it afraid of porn! It, like the secular artist, is honest. In other words, both the gospel and the secular artist are not afraid to say what is really going on! Notice that I did not say that they (the gospel and the artist) agree on what is right (or wrong) about what is going on.

The gospel praises the pleasures of sex, but never the distortion of it. The gospel exposes the fact that, yes, indulgence in pornographic material is exhilarating, pleasurable and intense; but it does not leave the individual in the slums. The artist sinfully feasts in those slums and calls others for company. When the song is over, however, all the guests are left with no artist and with dirty faces. Let the guilt begin.

The Krispy Kreme donuts are gone, now everyone sits around trying not to puke.

The gospel, on the other hand, goes to the slums and calls sinners to a superior pleasure! Again, porn is the horrible distortion of something that is gloriously good. Porn feeds the human appetite for pleasure and sexual intimacy with something less than glorious. The gospel doesn't call for an extinction of the appetite, but rather a redirection of it. A lion who is foolishly addicted to oatmeal should not be encouraged to stop eating; but rather, he should be redemptively redirected to eating steak!

Here's the only dangerous part - bringing the gospel to pornographers requires taming lions. But here is the glorious part - the gospel tames lions. And tamed lions live powerful lives. As Christians we must live the gospel. Christ died to set us free. He tore down the wall that kept us from our Superior Pleasure - God. This is forgiveness. This is fulfillment.

Here is the truth...The gospel targets sinners. Yes, even pornographers. And when it hits them, it powerfully changes them. Porn, though tempting, is no longer appealing. The lion looks at the oatmeal and smirks. By grace, I am living proof.
Posted by Scott Moore

Mmmm

2010-11-09T15:12:00.000-05:00

my first homemade pie. blackberry.:)

"I yike being bootiful."

2010-10-30T22:09:00.000-04:00

...that was the comment (among many) I heard from the 5 year old girl I drive to and from school.

That's Tamanna Cornwall. She's the second youngest of four. Her family adopted her 2 years ago from India. She has a precious, strong accent and a lot of time I have no idea what she is saying. "The tun is bight". (the sun is bright) "what tolor is my ton?" "lead?" (what color is my tongue? red?) :) she's precious.

On the way home from school Friday, she asked me if I liked her hair. (it was wavy/curly that day) I told her yes, it's very pretty. To which she replied, "yots of people tay i'm bootiful. I yike being bootiful!" I was taken back by this little girl's honesty & self-indulgence.

"Tamanna, you are beautiful but so is everyone else, in their own special way that God made them." I said. She shook her head like "ya, i know."

I was convicted because I know I can get sucked into finding my worth in my appearance. There's a lady at our church that always tells me how adorable I am which is flattering but I don't tend to take compliments very humbly. To be honest, it goes to my head and my heart and I get stuck on this "looks" treadmill of being visually pleasing to others. This is the sin default button in my life mainly because of the environment I grew up in. Always feeling I needed to look good. To outdo the other girls. I was saddened when I heard Tamanna's sweet voice express her pleasure in being valued for her looks. I pray that she will learn that God looks at the heart and her eternal value is found in Him. I pray I will continue to learn the same thing.

This is Jack Cornwall. He does not like to be called pretty. That's a good start. :)

~:January 22,2011:~

2010-10-12T20:29:00.000-04:00

My sister, Kirstie, is getting married. Aaron is truly perfect for her. I melt every time I'm with them; watching the way Aaron smiles at her and calls her "sweetie". I can't wait to be next to her as she was next to me on my wedding day.

This past Saturday, they had an engagement shoot with their friend/photographer Michelle Habegger. She's very talented. I think she did a great job capturing "Aaron & Kirstie" as they naturally are.

Aren't they adorable?

A little more about me

2010-10-09T15:06:00.000-04:00

I decided to fill out one of those online survey things. Here's a little info about me:

Two Names You Go By

1. nell-nell
2. danelley

Two Parts of Your Heritage

1. i'm irish- kiss me (only if you're family)
2. i'm german

Two Things That Scare You

1. people handling knives- even if they're just chopping tomatoes, i freak out.
2. being completely alone

Two of Your Everyday Essentials

1. walking with champ
2. fruit (usually apples or kiwi)

Two of Your Favorite Bands or Musical Artists (at the moment)

1. lecrae
2. audrey assad

Two Truths

1. i am physically incapable of burping. blessed or deprived? i'm not sure.
2. my family likes to hug a lot and that is why my #1 love language is touch.

Two Physical Things that Appeal to You About your husband.

1. i've always loved his unique-shaped ears
2. he is very generous and will go out of his way for a complete stranger

Two of Your Favorite Hobbies

1. bike riding, or as D.R. likes to refer to it: "cycling, it's more professional sounding" lol)
2. taking pictures. but I'm without a camera right now.

Two Things You Want Really Badly

1. salvation for a family member
2. a deeper respect for my husband

Two Places You Want to go on Vacation

1. europe- greece & paris especially
2. seattle, wa

Two Things You Want to Do Before You Die

1. adopt a baby from outside the U.S.
2. sky-dive

Two Ways That You are Stereotyped

1. i look like a teenager still so i get asked what grade i'm in.
2. i'll be carded until i'm 65 due to reason #1

Two Things You Are Thinking About Now

1. carving pumpkins
2. my sister having her engagement photos taken today and how she is going to be a wife in 3.5 months and i just can't stinkin' believe how great God is!

Two Stores You Shop At

1. publix
2. marshalls

Two favorite web sites

1. facebook
2. desiring god

Two Favorite Sports

1. this is the wrong
2. question for this gal!

Two things you did last night

1. drank wine with some girlfriends
2. told the story of how d.r. & i met

Two shows you like to watch

1. glee
2. the unit

Two places you like to go “out” to

1. the riverwalk downtown
2. the cannon-restaurant

happy weekend!

Hello Again

2010-10-06T10:36:00.000-04:00

I've been blog-absent for a while and I'm not sure why. I've had time to blog, I just haven't. It's interesting that when I have extra time on my hands, I spend less of it online. That's a good thing I think :) This is going to be a hodge-podge post of all the new things in my life as of a month ago. Plus some latest-favs of mine!

So, some things I really love about living in Columbus, GA are:

the weather! no more humidity like in West Palm & Mobile! My hair dries almost pin straight and I hardly have to use the blowdryer or straightener. This makes me very happy. I grew up ALWAYS having to use hairdryer, straightener, and iron....yes iron, to make my hair straight. I wasn't confident enough to walk out of the house with natural-dried hair because to me it resembled something close to 5th-grade "prom" hair.

the parks and running/bike trails. There are two really great trails that D.R. & I have biked 3-4x/wk. One is "Rails to Trails" (they paved over a railroad that isn't used anymore.) It starts at Cooper Creek Park which is 5 mi from our apt and takes you throughout midtown, by Columbus State(which is beautiful), and into downtown. Then there's the riverwalk trail. An 8 mi (one way) stretch right on the river. So serene and fun to ride! It's been really fun to pick up a hobby with D.R. Something we both look forward to on his days off. I would upload a picture of us on our bikes but we are without a camera right now. :(

the coffee shops. Not only do they have my favorite coffee in the world here, DD, but they have this place called Fountain City Coffee which has a flavor called toasted praline decaf. It's heaven. Plus they have the most delicious smoothies and wraps. It's my go-to treat place.

we're an hour and 15 minutes from Atlanta. Which means several things: a day visit to Ikea or Urban Outfitters is possible any day, flying anywhere is cheaper and is DIRECT!! I cannot tell you how happy this makes me. I love to fly but hate connections. Braves games, broadway shows, excellent shopping, concerts, Six Flags. I love being back near a big city that offers so much.

there are so many young couples/families. we keep hearing that Columbus is a great place to live when you're married and a great place to raise children but a horrible place to meet someone if you're single. Well, we got here at the right time in life I guess. It's true though, God has blessed us already with so many great new friends. We joined a small group of 25 people- mostly couples without children. We're going through a book called "holiness by grace" -bryan chapell. I'm very thankful for God's kind provision of new believing friends.

And a few of my favorites lately are:

Zumba: Ditch the workout. Join the party! I can't get enough. My secret booty-dancing parties that I have alone in my house are now shared with about 150 sweaty women at the local YMCA. It's an amazing workout and seriously so much fun.

Giada at Home: one of my favorite cooks on t.v. Plus the fact that she remains so slim and healthy motivates me to cook well and be in shape. Her meals are not always super cheap but they are always delicious. Go ahead and stock your fridge with fennel,lemons, fresh thyme & mint, pancetta, and mascarpone cheese (i know these are all the usually buys anyways right? lol) because those are guaranteed Giada meal ingredients.

The Unit: this show has quickly become one of D.R. and mine's favorites. It's similar to 24 which went off air in May :( and depicts the realities of army life.

Radical: a book by pastor of The Church at Brook Hills in Birmingham, AL: David Platt. This book has shown me my gluttonous desire for more "stuff" and the eternal destruction it will have on my soul. If you are not changed by this book, you probably need to examine your love for God & how His Word calls us to live.

That is all for now I guess.

Grief & Glory

2010-09-22T13:24:00.000-04:00

It's been two days since we got the email. Two days since the weeping began. Two days since we got on our knees and asked God, "Why?" Two days since God decided to take Virginia Kate home to Him.

Our friends Kevin & Shay Steedley were expecting their third daughter on September 15th. On Monday, five days overdue & 10 months pregnant, Shay went in for an appointment and there was no heartbeat to be found. Just days before, she was experiencing contractions and anxiously waiting to go into labor. But God had different plans for this little girl. He decided to take her home even before she entered this world. She would never meet her earthly mom and dad or two big sisters. She would never experience any human fellowship or heartache. This was God's perfect plan for Virginia "Ginna" Kate's life. From the womb, she met her maker and she is in glory with Him for eternity. One day Kevin, Shay, Becca & Ruby will meet their beloved daughter/sister. D.R. & I are so grieved for our friends in Mobile and have wept repeatedly since Monday morning. It doesn't seem fair. Doesn't seem right that Shay carried this child 10 months and then never got to hear her cry or laugh. But we serve and trust in a God whose ways we can't understand but know are good. We trust that this will be used for our good and His glory. Virginia was always meant to be with her Savior from day one. What a blessing! I've been so challenged by Kevin's email that he sent to our church family (in Mobile) on Monday. I thought I would share it with you. Soli Deo Gloria.

It's with a mixture of great grief and awestruck wonder in the greatness of our God that I'm writing this morning to let you know that Shay delivered our 3rd girl during the night, but [she] was stillborn. We need your prayers, love, and support. I believe we're grieving well right now, but will obviously be faced with various challenges and opportunities in the days ahead. Feel free to check in with us as you have opportunity…

Holding my dead infant daughter was a stark reminder that we are fallen people living in a fallen world. But in experiencing that grief I am still able to praise God. He has seen fit to take "our" girl to be with Him - and spare her the pain and sorrow this sin-filled world and our sin-filled hearts create. Jesus, the resurrection and the life, says whoever believes in Him, yet though he dies, will live again. Our hope is built on nothing less...

a telescope not a microscope

2010-08-25T16:28:00.000-04:00

Hello web log. It's been a while. Let me update you. :)

I was in college. Junior year. Samford University. I'd just transferred in from Palm Beach Community College; a small 2,000something junior college in my hometown. Samford was foreign. Alabama was foreign. The faces on campus were foreign. I felt completely alone for the first time in my life. There wasn't a soul in sight that knew my heart or could let me cry on their shoulder. It was January. The coldest month of the year in Birmingham, AL and I was facing a month of solitude & studying in my small 15x25 dorm room. I was taking one class (Biblical Perspectives) during what was called "Jan term" to get a little ahead of the game. I remember the following days after my parents left from helping me move my life to Alabama were ones of searching. Searching why all of a sudden I felt so lost. Back in Boynton Beach, in the 70 degree weather, I had all the familiar comforts: my family, my friends, my church, my beach, my routine. I was starting over in this cold, southern city and it was scary. I've never felt my need for the Lord as strong as I did than during that month of my life. I recall many nights sitting on my twin bed with my Bible in my lap just pouring over the inspired words of God and feeling so much comfort. He truly became my Bread, my Good Shepherd, my Comforter. He became real to me. He became.....God.

A week ago, I went to a woman's fellowship that my church has called "Devotions & Dessert". We've been watching the video series on Crazy Love by Francis Chan and discussing a chapter each time we meet. This week the question posed was, "When in your life, did you first realize that you truly loved God. I mean Really loved Him. Not just cause you're supposed to love him but really, passionately loved God?" A deep question to ask 40+ women on the spot. We all pondered for quite some time before the sharing began. It didn't take me that long to think back to those early Samford days.

I believe that, before I moved away from home in Florida that I viewed God through the lens of a microscope. What does a microscope do? It magnifies something that is really small. God was small to me. He wasn't the center of my universe- the Blazing Center (as John Piper describes Him). He was someone I could amplify when it was convenient for me. Like when I did well on a homework assignment, THEN God was BIG.But really I took the credit. I was the one who achieved success. I was the center of my own life. God was my #1 fan! (insert picture of God-like being wearing TEAM DANELLE shirt...ok don't) I was raised, like most middle-income American girls , spoiled. I was always well dress, well fed, well educated; and my parents were on the PTA. My parents selflessly devoted their lives to me and my sister- taking us to baton twirling, tumbling, ballet, cheerleading, volleyball, church events, pep rallies, etc. The message being imprinted on my heart was, "You're important." The word Depravity; or Ephesians 2 was not in my realm of knowledge yet. But once I was drawn away from my comfortable nest in Boynton to the uncharted waters of Birmingham, AL my reality was shaken up. I wasn't in charge of my own life. I couldn't even make friends without God allowing me to! All of a sudden, I realized, I need God. God doesn't need me. I needed Him to be my friend; and more than that, My Guide. I believe I became a Bible-believing Christian that January in 2005. I began to view God through the lens of a telescope. What does a telescope do?

It takes something that is huge and vast and brings it up close and personal. This is how God wants me to view Him. As glorious as He has always been. As big and powerful and vast in love & wisdom as He's always been. January 2005 was the beginning of my passion for God's glory and the killing of the passion for my own glory. God=Big; me=small. The way it should be.

Psalm 19:1 "The heavens declare the glory of God. The skies proclaim the work of His hands." Seems creation has it right.

fellowship so deep

2010-08-12T11:30:00.000-04:00

I'm continually learning how important and necessary community is in a believer's life. We cannot live life alone. We cannot fight sin alone. We cannot know Christ without the fellowship of the saints. I love my church. I love my community group. I love my women's Bible study group. I am richly blessed in this city.

This Caedmon's Call song is why we are called to be in community with other believers: to know the deep fellowship that the Trinity experiences constantly.

oh and be prepared to tear up...

For the love that knows no ending, in the wisdom of God's plan
For the light that was descending to revive the heart of man
Christ the Lamb was made to suffer and to die upon a tree
So that we, sisters and brothers, could know His fellowship so deep

Let us sing of our Redeemer and of His love that made us free
And know this gift is ours forever, a fellowship so deep
A fellowship so deep

We can feel his love among us; we can sing redemption's song
We can hear the Spirit call us to a place where we belong
For His joy is in our laughter and His comfort in our grief
Let His love here ever after be the language that we speak

Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia to the Lamb, alleluia to the Lamb
Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia to the Lamb, alleluia to the Lamb

"May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all."
2 Corinthians 13:14

Sparkle & Fade

2010-08-10T11:43:00.000-04:00

my new purchase from Urban Outfitters

can't wait to rock this at the beach this weekend!

i can't get no satisfaction!

2010-08-08T20:59:00.000-04:00

dramatic & sporatic

...that was the definition of my relationships in high school. i dated one guy for the majority of my teenage years. one guy whose heart i broke over & over again; one guy who eventually broke my heart. i never really thought about why i kept breaking up and going back out, breaking up and going back out with him. i just thought i was fickle (which is true). or maybe i was incapable of being faithful; but to prove i could try to be faithful i kept coming back only to break up 4,6,8 months later. the cycle continued for 6 years on again, off again, repeat. no one, i mean, no one stopped to tell me it was unhealthy- not my parents, not his parents, not family, not friends. so there we were: two hormonal, pimple-faced, emotion-driven teens trying to make a "marriage" work. essentially that's what we were trying to be- married. you know, without the sex & bills. it has plagued me ever since, why wasn't i content in that relationship? what was missing? we both loved God. (or so we thought) we both loved each other (or so we thought). why did I keep wanting to leave? why did he not want to leave?

today in sunday school i got my answer. scott moore , who teaches our youth, spoke about idols. he said we all have a God-shaped hole in us that only God Himself is meant to fill. that hole was there in high school. but instead of constantly filling it with God- His Word, His promises, His saints... I was filling it with a boyfriend- or trying. if you would've asked me in 8th grade or 12th grade if i've ever been in love, the answer would've been a resounding "YES". but did I know the true definition of love? no. Love, as the Bible defines it, "is from God"; "we love because He first loved us", "the fruit of the Spirit is love". God in me is love. love as John Piper defines it is, "the overflow of joy in God that meets the needs of others". well this was not the kind of love i experienced in high school. it was more characterized by: what can I get from you. what pleasure can you bring me. satisfy me! satisfy me! SATISFY ME!!!!!

and when he didn't... i left. selfish, i know. but he was selfish too. (well he was...) it's just the other side of the coin. he was always giving, showering, smothering me with words of praise, love letters, text messages, emails, gifts, romantic dates, affection, promises, yada yada yada. he did all those things because he was searching for someone to satisfy him. his acts seemed loving on the surface but all those things were for selfish gain not pure love. if he really loved me (and let's be honest people, no one should be in love at 15) he wouldn't have had to keep trying to win me over to himself. he would've been confident that he belonged to Christ and in Christ is complete satisfaction.

so when scott had said all this, i was like, "DING DING DING". this guy was an idol in my life. and i was an idol in his. we were both trying to fill our God-sized holes with measley human-sized things! Charles Spurgeon says "our hearts are idol-making factories". i think high school students' biggest idols are boyfriends/girlfriends and their looks. those were my two. i wasn't a confident teenager. i didn't know about God's passion for me. i didn't understand the deceitfulness of my own heart or the graveness of my sin. i didn't know how much my sin hurt my Savior. i didn't know- or i probably would've been a single gal. instead i clouded my heart with a boy. a boy that could never really satisfy me. and i returned the false hope to him.

i'm so thankful for this realization of idolatry in my past and in my present. my heart is an idol-making factory. i can easily make something good into something i must have. boom- idol (roasted). but God is so much more satisfying!! i know that. He has proven Himself more fulfilling over and over again but I still run back to the mudpiles of idols thinking they will satisfy me. why? b/c i'm a lousy sinner in constant need of God's grace & mercy.

current idol? babies. i think they'll complete me. wrong. once God gives us a baby, i'll be longin for ___________ ... a sweet minivan. things never satisfy. they always leave me wanting more. i'm so glad i have a God who longs to satisfy me fully & deeply in ways i can't contemplate! if i would only let him.

"You make known to me the path of life;
in your presence there is fullness of joy;
at your right hand are pleasures forevermore."
Psalm 16:11

kindred spirits

2010-08-08T00:39:00.001-04:00

....that would be me and David. David who wrote the book of Psalms. While we have a different tract record of sins, we both share a keen sense of our deceitful heart His 13th Psalm sums up my thoughts and struggles currently in my life.

1 How long, O LORD ? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?

2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and every day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?

3 Look on me and answer, O LORD my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;

4 my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.

6 I will sing to the LORD,
for he has been good to me.

Also a great Shane&Shane song.

Those who have received mercy, must give mercy

2010-08-08T00:22:00.000-04:00

This post is a copy paste from my friend & co-worker, Scott Moore. He's our associate pastor at Grace Community Church. He practically took the thoughts out of my heart. I'm blessed by his humble outlook on mercy ministry. I hope you are too.

Friday, May 7, 2010
I Just Looked Down and Shook My Head...
And as they walked out, I just looked down and shook my head. The door to the church opens almost on a daily basis as people come to us for help. Help, however, is a loaded word. What we mean by help and what they are coming to get are two different things. I cannot remember a single person who has come to us for the gospel. Most of the time they are coming for groceries, gas, or money to pay a bill.

After a particular encounter last week, I have found myself becoming somewhat calloused. For a few moments, I was resolved to just give them what they wanted and see them back out (until the next time, that is). Broken bones aren't healed by bandaids; and people who are coming to strangers for food are at least broken.

When I'm in trouble, I go to my wife. If she should be absent, I go to other friends or family. Personally, I can't think of a single situation where I would go to a stranger for charity. This is what is bringing a change in me. I have interviewed dozens of "mercy needs" - and among them there is at least one common denominator. For whatever reason, they have no one to turn to. There is no personal, benevolent, familial, Christ-like touch to heal their wounds.

From the sixty year old man who lives by himself, to the twenty-eight year old girl with her three children...they all have resorted to going to cold, mechanical-cash-giving, impersonal institutions for help. Sure, most of them give freely; but is it really free. I can't imagine the brokenness. They may not care; or at least, "think" they don't care. I will say however, that on more than one occasion, I have seen tears well up when I ask, "Is it hard having no one?"

It is at that moment when I see the image of God in the "mercy need" sitting across from me. My heart connects with theirs. I am, at that moment, not the white guy with the money, but another human being trying to make it through this messy world. It is at that moment when I beg the Lord to open our eyes to see the glories of the promise, "I will always be with you..."

The tears rarely flow. I usually hand them the groceries and invite them to church. Sometimes they come. Most don't. And when they do, it is so hard to get them to feel comfortable. The damage is so diverse and so deep that we are forced to give only one remedy - the Gospel; and back out the doors they go.

No matter how deep sin gets and no matter what circumstances try to hide its face, I see it all too clearly. Sin is sin; and I hate it more and more every day. But, the gospel is victorious. I don't have to see it work immediately. I am beginning to realize that it often changes people slowly. It takes time for a new heart to pump blood to the fingers. And until glory, life remains, even for the best of Christians, a big redemptive mess.

I know this - there were many who looked down and shook their head at me. But God, being rich in mercy, did not see fit to leave me the way I once was. He saved me. He gave me mercy. He changed me...slowly.

Yeah, its frustrating when people come in almost demanding groceries. Frankly, it ticks me off. "They don't deserve it!" I tell myself. Then the voice comes (either through inner conviction or my pastor or a deacon or fellow Christian), "Who deserves mercy?" That question makes me look down and shake my head. That question is all that is causing me, another "mercy need," to walk through the doors of my church another day.

Scott's Blog

Great New Artist

2010-08-06T11:55:00.000-04:00

JJ Heller. Check her out.

Shout Out

2010-08-03T12:33:00.000-04:00

...to the best photographer around, Rebekah Hood of Kallima Photography.

love these wedding details.

a shoot I did with Bek.

And here's Rebekah & her husband (and old friend of mine) Ben and their son, Josiah. Baby Darby is on the way!

The Graduate

2010-08-03T11:33:00.000-04:00

He did it. He's done with PA school. Praise the Lamb who was slain!!!!! He still has to take his board exam on the 13th but after that, he will officially be a Physician Assistant. I'm so grateful for how the Lord has provided for us throughout these last 27 months. He never once left us to fend for ourselves. He sustained D.R. through grueling hours of study, comforted my heart when I was alone, and grew our marriage in many ways. I will not miss the time that studying took D.R. away from me but I am thankful that God gave him the ability to be so dedicated. He finished well. God has provided a job. We are so thankful & I am so proud of my husband.

Receiving his certificate of completion!

My graduate

The McNew bunch (- Jay, Rach & Emma)

Pastor Jim & his sweet wife Becky came to support Geoff & D.R.

a weekend I will always remember

2010-08-03T10:12:00.000-04:00

First, Friday night, a friend of ours, Scott Parks, threw his wife of 8 years a surprise anniversary party at the church: complete with a precious 20 minute slideshow, a reenactment of the "Forever" aisle procession (orchestrated by yours truly. go here to view the original), and a food & dancing reception in the fellowship hall. Annie, Scott's wife, always wished she could have danced at her wedding & she finally got to. She danced with her dad, Scott danced with his mom, and they had their first wedding dance together. It was so sweet and such a blast to boogie down with my church family!

Highlight of the night? Everyones face when Usher's "Yeah" was playing and it said "we wan't a lady in the street but a freak in the bed." Hilarious.

Saturday was National Day of Dance. Across the nation, free dance classes were being taught and I got the honor of teaching the classes at my studio Mobile. I taught the "nat'l dance day dance" choreographed by Tabitha & Napoleon Dumo of So You Think You Can Dance. Then I taught a jazz piece and a hip hop piece. It was great fun- very tiring- but great fun. My feet are still sore from dancing for four hours straight. I think I got a taste of the live of a SYTYCD dancer.

It was probably the most fun I've had as a dancer. I will always remember it!

Then Sunday after church, D.R. and I hopped in the truck and drove to Columbus to look for an apartment. We decided renting was a smarter choice since our house is still on the market and the possibility of deployment is great in the next year & 1/2. I love the area we'll be living in! Publix is 3 miles away! A beautiful park is about 5 miles away and downtown is about 10 miles away. Perfect location. I noticed a few PCA churches in the area close to our apartment also. It's weird to think that future best friends are roaming that city. I'm really excited....and I'm thankful that I'm excited about moving! We stayed with a fraternity buddy of D.R.'s, Jack Pyles (& his wife Sara not shown). That's their 8 mo. daughter Maggie.

I wanted to kidnap her. She smiled at me all through dinner. I was like, "stop melting my heart, little one." lol We ate Sunday night at The Cannon downtown. I had wonderful grilled grouper tacos with chips & homemade salsa. I'll be eating there again soon. After dinner, we drove around the city and saw as much as we could while it was still light. Monday morning we woke up, grabbed some oatmeal & coffee/tea from Starbucks.... by the way, i am in LOVE with the sbux oatmeal. Too bad it's like $8.50. Then we headed to look at apartments. The second one we visited was Greystone Farms and we fell in love. It was one of the few that allowed dogs over 30 lbs and really accomdates having a dog. It has a walking trail, fenced in for dogs. We got a 2 bed/2 bath with a sunroom in the front. It's adorable; please come visit! Then we went by a dance studio to check out the classes & prices. Then we drove around and looked at some parks- there are parks everywhere in Columbus and all of them have some sort of river/ creek/lake running through them. Champ & I will be spending lots of time outside! Then we headed downtown to get lunch. We ended up choosing "The Coffee Shop". It had wraps, paninis, soup & salad. I got 1/2 gourmet grilled cheese (made with provolone, feta, mozzarella, american cheese & greek dressing) & 1/2 greek salad. It was fantastic. D.R. got this tuscany sandwich that he loved. I'm tellin' ya, we had some good eats in Columbus. Very exciting. Although, we will not be eating out much while paying a mortgage & rent simultaneously. We finished the trip with a visit to Ft. Benning- the local army base. This was D.R.'s first time on an army base. Ironic, he's been on all other-type bases (air force, navy, coast guard). It was pretty neat but I have to say, I don't think I'd enjoy base life. I felt trapped inside a "gated city". I don't know. Maybe my heart will change on that some day. We've started watching "The Unit" and it's quickly becoming one of my favorite shows.
I'm glad to be back home in Mobile and enjoy it for the rest of August.

I think I'm gonna like Columbus....

2010-07-22T11:53:00.000-04:00

They have Publix....where shopping is a pleasure. I grew up shopping with my mom at Publix; it's near and dear to my heart.

They have Dunkin Donuts. The only coffee shop that makes a small coffee with the perfect amount of cream and sugar...everytime. Plus, my favorite sweet fix, a strawberry frosted with sprinkles donut. Now where's the gym?

They have a riverwalk bike trail. D.R. and I are already saving for bikes.

Most importantly, we're praying that God leads us to a church to serve at. I'm really excited for this new season.

A dollar well spent

2010-07-20T11:44:00.000-04:00

D.R. & I want to save money to go to Europe. We've talked about it ever since we got married. I think once we settle into our new home (wherever that will be)we'll start saving. Here's a clever idea how to do it... (from www.girltalk.blogs.com)

"For ten years, my husband's and my favorite way to spend a dollar...

Dear Ann Landers: Last weekend, we celebrated my parents' 50th wedding anniversary. This morning, they left on a long-awaited trip to Hawaii. They were as excited as if it were their honeymoon.

When my parents married, they had only enough money for a three-day trip 50 miles from home. They made a pact that each time they made love, they would put a dollar in a special metal box, and save it for a honeymoon in Hawaii.

Dad was a policeman, and Mom was a schoolteacher. They lived in a modest house and did all their own repairs. Raising five children was a challenge, and sometimes, money was short, but no matter what emergency came up, Dad would not let Mom take any money out of the "Hawaii account." As the account grew, they put it in a savings account, and then, bought CDs.
I can remember Dad coming home and telling Mom, "I have a dollar in my pocket," and she would smile at him and reply, "I know how to spend it."

When each of us children married, Mom and Dad gave us a small, metal box and told us their secret, which we found enchanting. All five of us are now saving for our dream honeymoons. Mom and Dad never told us how much money they had managed to save, but it must have been considerable, because when they cashed in those CDs, they had enough for airfare to Hawaii, plus, hotel accommodations for 10 days, and plenty of spending money.

As they told us goodbye before leaving, Dad winked and said, 'Tonight, we are starting an account for Cancun. That should only take 25 years.'"
-- A Loving Daughter in Abilene, Texas

what Christian radio is NOT playing...

2010-07-12T15:00:00.001-04:00

and what a shame....

One of my favorite songs, "The Cross" by Shai Linne. This is why D.R. & I listen to Christian, reformed rap these days. Cuz it's flippin' the Gospel! We've had enough of the 80% of watered-down, seeker-friendly songs played on Christian radio. This cuts, convicts and inspires. Praise be to God for music that preaches!

Shai Linne, "The Cross" reach records:

(verse 2)
We’re now in the realm of the sublime and profound

With God at the helm it’s about to go down

The Father’s wrath precise will blast and slice

The priceless Master Christ as a sacrifice

Willingly, He’s under the curse

To be treated as if the Son was the worst scum of the earth

The scene is the craziest

Jesus being treated as if He is the shadiest atheist

How is it the Messiah is in the fiery pit

As if He was a wicked liar with twisted desires?

The One who’s sinless and just

Punished as if He was promiscuous and mischievous with vicious lust

The source of all godly pleasure

Tormented as if He was a foul investor or child molestor

How could He be bruised like He was a goodie two-shoes

who doesn’t think that she needs the good news?

He’s perfect in love and wisdom

But He’s suffering as if He constructed the corrupt justice system

We should mourn at the backdrop

Jesus torn like He’s on the corner with crack rock with porn on His laptop

What is this, kid? His gifts are infinite

But He’s hit with licks for religious hypocrites

He’s the Light, but being treated like

He’s the seedy type who likes to beat His wife

He’s treated like a rapist, treated like a slanderer

Treated like a racist or maybe a philanderer

Jesus being penalized like He had sin inside

Filled with inner pride while committing genocide

I could write for a billion years and still can’t name

All of the sins placed on the Lamb slain

But know this: the main thing the cross demonstrated

The glory and the holiness of God vindicated

go HERE to listen and be blessed! Romans 1:16!

feeling humbled is an understatement

2010-06-27T23:13:00.000-04:00

God rocked my world this past week. He made me realize something so important about my life and my relationship with Him. See...I'm a self-centered person. I really am. Especially in my marriage. But lately it's been worse than usual. I feel a right to be correct; to argue my way around everything and wear my poor husband out. I have been arguing with everything he says which is so stupid. He's drained and feels disrespected. I'm upset and feel unloved. Doesn't make for a very peaceful home. I have been praying earnestly that God give me contentness with the whole not trying to get pregnant thing, also been asking God to make me an effective leader with my high school girls, also been asking that God show me what to do with my life if we move to a new city. All these things are great to bring to God but i wasn't asking Him for what I most needed. Restoration with my husband. A rekindled fire for the man I'm married to. I desire to serve him self-lessly. I needed to be close with D.R. I just didn't want it....seriously....I didn't want to be close to my husband. I was content doing my own thing- my church job thing, my dance thing, my work-out regiment- and asking God to bless all these areas of my life for His glory all the while letting my marriage rot.

It's a good thing, God didn't bless those things. Instead he turned my attention to Malachi 2:13-16. "And this second thing you do. You cover the Lord's altar with tears, with weeping and groaning b/c he no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. But you say, "Why does he not?" Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. I hate divorce. For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless."

God was not answering my prayers because I wasn't being a faithful wife. He is THAT concerned with marriage! Did you catch verse 14? The Lord was witness...WITNESS.. btw you and the wife/husband of your youth. He saw all the ugly selfishness in me when I fought for my way; every time I made D.R. feel stupid for having an idea. God was the witness. I should feel sorrowful over that- like the way you felt when mom caught you making out with your boyfriend in high school- that kind of shame. But I didn't at first.

I'm so glad I have a God who is fighting for my marriage even when I am not. If I was super content at work and pumped about how well I was teaching dance and winning hearts to Christ in my h.s. girls Bible study, then I would easily continue to be blind to the decay of my marriage with D.R. But praise be to God that my eyes have been opened! I was blind but now I see! I see my need for reconcilation with my beloved husband. I WANT to respect him and stop arguing. I don't have the desire to be right every time we talk. Humility does that. It makes you bow low and let the other person stay up high. It gives and does not expect in return. Only Christ can give a heart of humilty.

I am so thankful for this passage in Malachi that God pointed me towards. It has changed my attitude, given me a renewed love for D.R. and made me want to fight harder to preserve the sweet covenant marriage I am in.

Mr. & Mrs. Marlon Harris

2010-06-15T13:09:00.000-04:00

They'll be married 31 years next Wednesday. I'm lucky to have two parents who love each other faithfully after all these years. Happy Anniversary mom & dad! Click here to view their anniversary album.

June 23, 1979. Miami, FL. Making their getaway in a shaving cream-covered camaro. <3

Break Us Down

2010-06-12T17:45:00.000-04:00

This is an excerpt from Mike Donahey's (Tenth Avenue North)'The Over & Underneath Journals". It's a look into the book of Hosea and the story of God's pursuit of His adulturous people, Israel.

"Come let us return to the Lord. He has torn us to pieces but he will heal us; he has injured us but he will bind up our wounds." -Hosea 6:1

Excuse me, what?!
Who has torn us?
Who has injured us?
The Lord?!?
Wait a second there Hosea, didn't you mean to say Satan has torn us? Or maybe bad people?
You sure that's not a typo or something?

Personally, I think one of the most difficult things I've ever had to reconcile in my head and heart is this idea that a loving, merciful, compassionate God would hurt me. And not on accident either, but purposefully and willfully. God will unapologetically tear me into pieces so that He can heal me.
And you.
Strange huh?

And I suppose it isn't so terribly surprising coming from a prophet who was made to marry a harlot. If anyone would know something about being hurt by the Lord it would be him right? I don't know if you know the story, but I mean, just put yourself in his place for a second.
There you are. The man. The dude. You're the prophet over all of Israel, and you've been keeping yourself pure, praying every day for the woman that God will give to you and then He finally speaks, but its not at all what you were hoping for.

God: "Hosea."
Hosea: "Yes Lord?"
God: "It's time."
Hosea: "Ahh Yeaaa! That's what I was hoping You were going to say. Time for a wife right Lord?"
God: "Yes Hosea, it's time for a wife."
Hosea: Ooh, I can't wait! Just tell me though God, is she hot and holy? Cuz you know, I've been keeping myself pure, and I just know you're gonna reward me with a wife that's hot and holy. That's all I'm asking for because hey, that's what I deserve right?"
God: "Well, not exactly. I don't think she's quite what you had in mind."
Hosea: "Wait, what? Oh, I see! She's even hotter and holier than I thought! Oh yea, Lord I know how you work."
God: "Well, no."
Hosea: "What do you mean, no?"
God: "Hosea, I don't know how to tell you this, well, of course I know how to tell you this, I'm God, it's just, well.....she's a prostitute."
Hosea: "prosti-what?"
God: "Prostitute. Whore. Lady of the Night."
Hosea: "No, no I know what it is, but a PROSTITUTE?!"
God: "Yea, I know that's not what you were planning, but it's what I was planning, so you're gonna marry her."
Hosea: "I'm gonna do what?"
God: "You're going to marry her, but then of course, she'll cheat on you, and sell herself so you'll have to go buy her back."
Hosea: "Go what?"
God: "Yeah, you're going to forgive her and buy her back and when she cheats on you again and has children with other lovers, you're going to love them and take her back again."
Hosea: "Come again?"
God: "You're going to love her kids and take her back."

Long awkward silence.

Hosea: "What's her name?"
God: "Gomer"
Hosea: "Oh Come on!!!!"

Now I apologize if your name is Gomer, but you do have to admit, it's a rather unfortunate name, and an even more unfortunate situation. But the Bible records that it did happen. maybe not exactly like that, but God did tell Hosea to marry an adulterous wife.
And the reason that the Lord supplies in Hosea 3 is that their marriage was to show us how He loves his people. He loves his people like an adulturous wife.

And the story is so insanely beautiful when you see it from that angle, but when you look at it from Hosea's angle it's just plain crazy. Think about what you'd say if your pastor got up in front of the congregation and announced that he was about to marry a whore.
What would your response be?
Now, I'm not suggesting that everyone go out and marry someone from the local street corner, but I am saying that it is evident that God will do whatever He has to do to bring you to a place where all you want is Him.

He'll break you, He'll hurt you, He'll ruin your plans. and He'll tear you into pieces, and He'll do it all out of a perfect, holy love.
And look, I know that sounds crazy, but think about it for a moment.
A lot of people want to use God to get something other than Himself. If we're honest, we'll admit that we all do it on some level. For instance, we don't have sex until we're married, because then God owes us a virgin spouse. We give 10% of our income to a church, because then God owes us prosperity and wealth. We pray and pray, and then God owes it to us to answer and give us what we want. And in all those cases, Jesus is no longer the end, but simply a means to something else.

You've got to see that in Hosea's case, or perhaps in the case of that one friend of yours who thinks marriage is the goal of their existence. Don't laugh. It might be you.
But if you think about it, it would actually be unloving of God to go and make our marriage perfect and make that person fulfill our every hope and dream.
Why?
Because that person will die.
That marriage will end, and if your whole life and existence and joy depends on another human being, you will inevitably be in for heartache. Just read the Twilight series (it's true, I've read it, though I'm not proud of it) and see how the heroine Bella, how her entire life falls apart when her vampire lover leaves her. Put simply, if our joy rests entirely upon human love or vampire love, or any other kind of eartly love for that matter, then one day, our joy will be destroyed. Is this making sense?
Of course, marriage is just one example.
Money. Security. Fame. Obedience. Sex. Drugs. Worship Music.
If our hope is set in anything but the living person of Christ, then we're just setting ourselves up for failure. And so God, in his infinite and everlasting love, will do whatever He has to do to break, bend, and conform his people's hearts to Him. He will no longer be the means to some other end, but the end Himself.
Like a surgeon who has to cut you open, so God must tear us apart to create in us a new heart. But unlike a doctor, He doesn't just use a knife. he uses the most bizarre people, circumstances, and tragedies to change our hearts until they only treasure Him.
He will break us down. And it will be painful, scary, and altogether beautiful. Friends, if the Lord is tearing down your world today, if all the walls on your so carefully constructed plans are caving in on themselves, then ask Him in faith, "God, are you my treasure?" And if you find the answer is no, then ask Him to bring it on. Break out the scalpel. Tear down the walls. Let loose the storms. Ask Him to do whatever He has to do, until you can proclaim with the psalmist, "Whom have I in heaven but you, and earth has nothing I desire besides you." (Psalm 73)

All this world is fading away anyway right? Then take heart.
This life is not about succeding.
It's not about changing the world.
It's not about living with purpose, or leaving a legacy or making the maximum impact with your life.
It's actually not even about living your life "for" God.
Did you hear me?
Don't live your life for God

Live your life because God.

Because He has loved us, redeemed us, and because He is all that our hearts are longing for.
It's no longer about what to do with your life at all, because He is your life.
May He do whatever it takes to open our eyes to see that.
He is the means and He is the end. And everything in between is from His hand.
It can be terrifying at times, I know, but it's worth it.
Believe me, and I guess more importantly, believe Him. It's worth it."

Mike Donahey from Tenth Avenue North

healthy AND satisfying

2010-06-05T21:25:00.000-04:00

I'm trying to snack healthier. I usually grab some tortilla chips and a big bowl of salsa when I'm hungry for a snack but lately it's been celery sticks and apples which are great but don't satisfy my hunger. Solution? yogurt + granola + sliced strawberries. Yum

I think I'll get some now.

HSGSBS

2010-05-31T16:39:00.000-04:00

that's.... high school girls summer Bible study :) I'm hoping to study the book of Hosea with these girls this summer. I am approaching this with fear and trembling and am asking that my readers (Grace, Betty, Beth mainly) that you pray for me as I lead these young women this summer. I know that I cannot teach them apart from the Holy Spirit giving me the words and interpreting Holy scripture for me. Pray that I would be diligent in my personal study and give it all I have each week. Thanks so much!

If you'd like to pray for these girls by name they are: (from left to right)
Laura Walks, Caroline Bryars, (me), Katie Campbell

"Whitty"

2010-05-31T16:26:00.001-04:00

One of my best friends from college got engaged a couple weeks ago. This past weekend she and her new fiance came to stay with us. It was a blast! They are so fun together. Emily "Whitty" whom I affectionately call "Whitty" met Parker at Focus on the Family out in Colorado. Parker boldly asked for her number but Whitty declined because she was dating someone else at the time. They became facebook friends and as soon as her status changed to "single" Parker didn't hesitate to send her a message and ask for her number. He continued to pursue her and eventually gave up a career with mini-league baseball in Texas and moved to Birmingham to be near her. They are to be wed in mid November at Reid Chapel on Samford University's campus. I have the honor of being a bridesmaid. My first bridesmaid experience- I cried when she asked me. She's been a dear friend since my very first days at Samford- always demonstrating trust, loyalty and purity. We were accountability partners throughout college and studied the book of James during many lunches at SU. She's one of the classiest women I know and I'm so thrilled I get to share her wedding day with her and Parker! D.R. & I love you guys! Thank you Lord for Godly friendships.

Surrender

2010-05-20T11:20:00.000-04:00

...is a really hard thing. I've been reading through I Samuel and been convicted and inspired by the story of a young woman who was deeply saddened that the Lord had closed her womb. Her husband's other wife(sketchy) was very fruitful and had many children. She prays that if God will only open her womb and give her a son, she will give him back to God for a life committed to service. The Lord grants her a son and she is faithful to her promise. Such a beautiful story. In this season of my life I have a serious choice. I can choose to trust the Lord to be the all-satisfying, soul-pleasing, heart-gardener of my life or I can not trust Him and keep longing for things that will never wholely satisfy my desires.

My deepest prayer in this season and what I'm crying out to the Lord is this:

"Lord help me believe that 'Godliness with contentment is great gain. For I brought nothing into the world, and I can take nothing out of it. But if I have food and clothing, I will be content with that.' I believe in Your goodness; now help my unbelief. I trust that you are a sovereign, good God who longs to give good things to those who fear You. Enable me to believe that even if I never am able to have children, or live close to family that You are working all things for my good and Your glory. Help me to not grieve the Holy Spirit within me that convicts my adulturous heart. Remind me that Your love is abundant and Your mercy is new with each morning. Give me passionate joy to be a wife who loves to serve, who gives much and expects little. Help me to be the woman who takes delight in keeping a home clean and liveable (need some motivation in that area-lol), and most of all Lord let all that is in me hunger for time with You: in prayer, in Your perfect Word, and, in fellowship with other saints. Sustain me in continuing to 'run the race' for Your glory. I love you. Amen."

"I have not departed from your laws,
for you yourself have taught me.
How sweet are your words to my taste,
sweeter than honey to my mouth!
I gain understanding from your precepts;
therefore I hate every wrong path."

Psalm 119:102-104

It's Me

2010-05-11T13:14:00.000-04:00

Just when I think Sara Groves can't dig any deeper into my soul, she does. In her new song "It's me" she discusses the hardships of marriages saying,

"Sometimes when Troy, my husband, and I are in the midst of a disagreement, one of us will say something that's really sarcastic or just so overt. And being on the receiving end of that, it's like, 'Honey, it's me ... Sara.' Or vice versa. We just forget who we're talking to and the value of that person. For whatever reason, you cross that line where sensitivity and tenderness are discarded. You'd never talk to anyone else like that or treat someone else like that. Troy and I are working on that--talking to each other and interacting with each other in those situations in the way we would a complete stranger."

What a smart gal. I know I don't think highly enough of my husband, D.R. as I should. And often, I think he's out to get me and take his words to seriously and miss a simple, fun-intended joke. Although, anything that requires saying, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that." shouldn't be said in the first place. My husband & I are learning to treat each other with more consideration; like we would an elder at our church. It's pretty sad when I show my boss/pastor more respect that my own husband. Oh, I need more grace.

Here’s the new video for the song “It’s Me”
Click Here To Watch

A great night

2010-05-10T21:51:00.000-04:00

This weekend was our dance recital.

My cheer/tumble class.

My hip-hop class.

My fairytale ballet class.

I danced with them onstage :)

My adult jazz class :) so much fun!

Being honored as a teacher.

One of my favorite dancers, Madison Slade. I taught her a solo this year and spent a lot of time with her. I'll miss her if we move from Mobile.

What a special night. I love Broadway South Dance.

Is God Sovereign over Disability?

2010-05-06T13:47:00.000-04:00

An excerpt from Desiring God.

What do you think about this expansion of Psalm 139:13-16? I've added some additional descriptors in italics to bring out what we really mean if we believe that God is sovereign over disability:

For you formed my inward parts with Down syndrome;
you knitted me together in my mother's womb without eyes.
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made with cognitive challenges.
Wonderful are your works in creating me without limbs;
my soul knows it very well though my ears will never hear a sound.
My frame was not hidden from you as you made me with Apert syndrome,
when I was being made in secret with autism,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth without Hexosaminidase A.
Your eyes saw my unformed substance with spina bifida;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me with cerebral palsy,
when as yet there was none of them.

He is sovereign over all. Hallelujah. God, give us grace to accept these things.

For the full journal entry click here.

Cinco-de-Kiddos!

2010-05-06T11:08:00.001-04:00

I just wanted to say that I am so incredibly thankful for the families God has put in our lives here in Mobile, AL. Just to name a few: the McSheas, the Steedleys, the Gunns, the Nelsons, the Spiveys, the Albertsons, the Moores, the Villacampas, the Reeds, the Bryars... I could go on but I'd probably name the whole church. The moms & dads in our church are parenting their children to know and love God from birth. They are teaching them that they are sinners with "black hearts" from the time they come out of mommy's belly. I heard one of the Steedley girls (4 yrs old) tell me that "no body is born good. we all have black hearts." I was blown away. What a proud moment for a mom & dad to see how the Truth is penetrating even the youngest of hearts. True belief & true repentance is evident in these young children and it's only because of the parents commitment to consistently lead them "in the way they should go"; always talking about Him "on the road, while they sit at home, or lie down". Jesus Christ is not just a character in a book. He's a best friend. As 4 yr old Becca said, "mommy is my best friend!...well after God." I could cry that's so precious!!! We ate Mexican with a couple of these families last night and I was so over-joyed to sit back and watch the moms & dads parent in a Biblical, God-honoring way. I pray one day, God will give me the grace & strength to do the same.

Happy Seis de Mayo :)

Future Glory!

2010-05-03T10:56:00.000-04:00

I like Mondays. Because I do not work until 5pm at the studio. I take my mornings slow: sleep till 8 or 8:30, eat some breakfast, do some reading, go grocery shopping. Then after lunch, I take champ to the park &/or go work out, finish some laundry, watch a Rachel Ray episode, lay out if it's nice or clean if it's overcast (weather dictates). But my favorite thing about Mondays is the ample amount of time I have to meet with Jesus. Some Mondays I don't use this time wisely but today I'm off to a great start and feel better about going forward already.

I was reading in Romans this morning about our painful, present circumstances that we all have in our lives and how they can not compare to the future glory that will be revealed in us....IN US! We will be made new. We, God's saints, will receive a reward from God. Why? Because He chose us, loves us and it brings Him glory to do so. I then read on about how creation is in constant groaning and waiting to be restored and delivered from it's inevitable decay. Even the trees and bushes and flowers are looking forward to the Day when they are "liberated from the bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God." But their bondage is not an earthly bondage; theirs is a spiritual bondage. They are in complete submission to Christ even when they aren't producing fruit or die. I think it's so cool that our mighty Creator is intimately concerned about the grass, the wildflowers on the side of the road and the rushing waters. Even they have a part in God's redemptive story. Let's read on: 8:22-25 "We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently."

"But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body." Philippians 3:20-21

God is all about some "Divine Delays" to teach us to trust Him. I don't know if I'm waiting patiently as v.25 says, but I am waiting eagerly. It's weird to think about having a glorious body. Sounds pretty awesome- but weird. The truth is we can't imagine the joy and honor that comes with receiving a body like Christ's but I guess I wouldn't want to b/c then my mind would think it could dream up something "better" and there is nothing better than being made into the exact form of Christ in all his divinity! The New Jerusalem is more than my mind can handle but I know it will be wonderful and fulfill all my heart's longings because Jesus will be there and He is precious to me. He becomes more precious to me as I learn to let go of things He takes away. Refining is painful. Creation's decay is painful. But it's all a part of God's redemptive story to make all things new again on the Day of His return!

I love the SKINNIES

2010-04-28T11:03:00.001-04:00

my latest buy was jeans for NINE DOLLARS AND FIFTY CENTS! and I love them.

"My Tummy Hurts"

2010-04-28T10:58:00.001-04:00

This is a praise: for the past...um... 5 months or so I've had stomache issues. Irregular stool, bloatedness, the painful and sudden urge to go after a meal. It's very frustrating. But I think we (DR & I) determined that it's because I haven't been eating well or drinking enough water. So, I've been tote-ing a water bottle to work every day and eating less (weep...) chips & salsa- favorite comfort food. I'm actually feeling better the last couple days. Praise God. I hope it fixes the problem permanently b/c I can't completely give up my favorite snack!

DANCE

2010-04-22T23:50:00.000-04:00

I.

Love.

Dance.

Time for Honesty

2010-04-07T12:27:00.000-04:00

I have really been struggling with envying the pregnant women in my life. My husband & I are not trying to get pregnant because of still being in graduate school but I still struggle very much with wanting a child and not wanting others to have children. I found myself mistreating many pregnant friends of mine at my church by not smiling in the hallway or engaging in usual conversations. I'm the church secretary so it's an especially hard environment to be in; hearing who's pregnant and watching them bring their children to the church to Bible study during the week. I was so ugly in my actions but more ugly in my thoughts. I realized I was really wronging them by being so closed off. My jealously and envy not only hurt my relationship with God, my husband D.R., my friends but with the whole church body. I realized my sin really affects all others around me- in my case my church family. Praise be to God that where my sin was abounding, His grace abounded even stronger. He showed me my sin through other saints and I was able to repent and receive forgiveness from women I was intentionally ignoring. (Js. 4:17- ouch)

So many people have helped be part of the conviction & encouragement to root out this sin in my heart. I still struggle but I'm now accountable to God to take my jealous thoughts captive and replace them with thankfulness for all He's given; which is more than I deserve.

Grace & Peace

Staying Healthy

2010-04-07T11:03:00.000-04:00

I will admit lately I have developed bad eating habits. I love chips and salsa or dip (of any kind) which means I should never buy it or I'll devour it all in two days. Plus I made the mistake of buying a mix of chocolate eggs (butterfinger, crunch, caramel, milk) to put on my desk at the church (...for the kids, don't judge lol)... little satans wrapped in colored tin foil is what they are. Back to 0 cal. jolly ranchers. I'm going home this weekend and I know I'll eat more than usual as my mom cooks all my favorite things and treats me to fun restaurants. I need to exercise some self control with the snacking. It's becoming a little crazy.

On a positive note, I have started to exercise to this video called Pure Barre. It's a fusion of pilates and dance- right up my alley. It's already produced results in the backside/thigh area which is very encouraging. The lady on the video says ,"ideally you don't want your seat to look like a pancake. you want it to have some shape." Ha! Yes ma'am I do. Pancake seats are for old men, not for this 25 almost 26 yr old gal. It's really fun too- hard work but fun. Pure Barre along with teaching dance during the week has saved my figure. I'm blessed to work half days right now which allows for walks/runs at the park, doing my 45 min PB video or just stretching. Fitness always makes me feel more alive and I know I'm doing my heart some good. If interested go HERE and check our Pure Barre. Two of my sorority sisters opened a branch in Birmingham (ahem... Betty) and are fabulous at teaching. (i hear)

happy hump day (wednesday)!!!

2010-04-05T13:49:00.000-04:00

i.am.so.excited. !!!!!!! I love my hometown. It's so beautiful, so fun, and so full of life. Plus I love my family so ya know-extra bonus seeing them :) Update soon to come on the trip home.

Also, random but... I love my new find at Forever XXI. and you should know i'm obsessed with that store. I am never overwhelmed like many say they are when they enter it, rather elated is the approp. word. :)

Happy Monday Everyone!

Altar Calls: Biblical?

2010-03-31T11:31:00.000-04:00

D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones gives some answers.

1. It is wrong to put direct pressure on the will. The will should always be approached primarily through the mind, the intellect, and then through the affections. The action of the will should be determined by those influences.

2. In the end it may produce a condition in which what has determined the response of the man who ‘comes forward’ is not so much the Truth itself as, perhaps, the personality of the evangelist, or some vague general fear, or some other kind of influence.

3. The preaching of the Word and the call for decision should not be separated in our thinking

4. This method surely carries in it the implication that sinners have an inherent power of decision and of self-conversion.

5. There is an implication here that the evangelist somehow is in a position to manipulate the Holy Spirit and His work. Some organizers today even predict the results.

6. This method tends to produce a superficial conviction of sin, if any at all. People often respond because they have the impression that by doing so they will receive certain benefits.

7. You are encouraging people to think that their act of going forward somehow saves them.

8. It raises the whole question of the doctrine of regeneration. This is the most serious thing of all. This work is the work of the Holy Spirit, and His work alone, no one else can do it. And as it is His work it is always a thorough work; and it is always a work that will show itself.

9. No sinner ever really decides for Christ.

and as A.W. Tozer says "Don’t come down here to cry about it, go home and live it!"

No One Takes His Life

2010-03-30T13:41:00.001-04:00

Mark 10:33-34: “See, we are going up to Jerusalem, and the Son of Man will be delivered over to the chief priests and the scribes, and they will condemn him to death and deliver him over to the Gentiles. And they will mock him and spit on him, and flog him and kill him. And after three days he will rise.”

The amazing thing about Jesus is that he is intentional with everything He does. No one is taking His life from Him. He gives it up freely. That's important to understand. If He did not offer up his life, our sin would not be atoned for. God deliberately turned His back on Jesus and let His one and only Son be falsely accused, beaten and hung on a wooden cross. I get chill bumps just thinking of it. But what blows me away is the submission of Jesus to the will of God. He is fully God and yet fully man. That means He knows all that is going to happen to Him; every person who would betray Him, every whip lash, every false word spoken about Him yet- submission the whole way through. I tend to forget the fully human part of Jesus. I know He's God/deity but He was 100% flesh and felt 100% hell for so long. I mean, He suffered my hell on that cross. And your hell, believer. Can you imagine being God and walking your Son up the mountain to His death? and then turning your back on Him? uh-no. Can you imagine (those of you w/out children) walking your dog or cat up to a mountain and sacrificing them for the sake of others? uh-no. I wouldn't give my loved one for anyone! And God gave Jesus. Sinless Jesus.

If that doesn't humble you, nothing in this world will.

On a lighter note, these are great to do with kids or just with your husband to remember the Easter story.

Obedience: The place of joy and safety

2010-03-23T11:38:00.000-04:00

Hello blog world. I have returned finally after a long hiatus. I blog in my head... to myself... ALL THE TIME. LoL Thoughts in my head are always more collected than when I put them on paper. It's like my relationship with God, I talk to Him a lot during the day and I learn a lot from Him during the day but do I think to write it down? No, a big mistake. So I thought it necessary to journal about this certain happening so that years from now I can look back and see the faithfulness of God. Stones of remembrance are very important to build my faith. I often forget when God has enabled me to be obedient and totally should document them so He can get the glory over and over again.

So here we go....

I have for a long while been harboring jealousy and even worse: envy (which involves malicious action) against a few people. It's been my "secret sin" that most don't see in my life. But nothing is secret from God so who was I kidding? He(God) made clear to me that this was going to be a detriment to my marriage and my relationship with others and most importantly my relationship with my God. I ignored Him for so long and kept on in sin; knowing full well what I was doing. I even read in Romans about storing up wrath for myself by disobeying the Lord and STILL I was stubborn. God even tried to use several precious women to warn me of the seriousness of this struggle and the implications of holding on to it so tightly and thinking it's "innocent". It wasn't until I had my sister holding me accountable to make a change that I felt the weight of my sin. (Js 4:17- thx Kirst) God used her mightily in this situation to convict me. I suddenly felt an urgency to take these people off my radar screen so that the temptation to sin would not be present. God enabled me to flee. And while I'm still battling the "ways around obedience" in my flesh, I can feel the peace that this act of obedience has brought and it's so worth it.

There is nothing sweeter than feeling close and intimate again with my Savior. I missed Him. It's awesome to once again feel my need for Him in such a strong way.

You know what's funny, is I have really noticed how handsome D.R. is lately. I mean he always was but man o man..... he's cute.

Give Thanks In All Things

2009-11-30T09:54:00.000-05:00

This year I am thankful for too many things to count really. God has been so gracious on me and my family. I'm amazed how He provides, protects, sanctifies, heals, reconciles, and loves us unconditionally.

I'm thankful for D.R. In this second year of marriage I've noticed how generous a husband I have. He is always thinking up ways to help people who don't have the blessings we have. He has a kingdom-perspective on money which I am trying to gain more of. He makes me laugh. No one really knows the goofy, silly D.R. like I do. Shhh.... he likes to sing his thoughts to me to a familiar tune- which ever one pops to his head at the moment. I try not to act amused sometimes but my tickle bone always gets me and I burst out laughing. He's a joy. I'm blessed to have a man who fears the Lord and longs to cultivate a deeper relationship with Christ every day. I'm glad I have a husband who cares more about my sanctification and presenting me without blemish than my circumstances & often faulty emotions. There's a song that is on Sara Groves latest c.d. called Fireflies & Songs and it says "I was drawn to you in ways I can't explain. We fought like crazy but I couldn't stay away. We piled on expectations and lots of blame. ; like we couldn't do it any other way." This was the beginning of our relationship- D.R. & I..... Sara Groves is unbelievable at putting to words what I feel in my heart. Anyways... put her new c.d. on your wishlist!

I'm thankful for our family and friends who are always there. I'm extra thankful for Kirstie, my younger sister. I've written about her a few times on here. We have a strong bond that I know is only possible because of the Lord's hand. Sisters are even better when they are your best friends. Love you Kirst. Mom and dad, I couldn't love you more. Thank you for raising me to love Jesus. It has been your best gift to me. Granny, oh granny... I don't think there's a memory of you that doesn't involve hugs and uplifting words and FUN! You taught me to embrace my silliness and be myself. I'm thankful for your generosity, your kindness, your love. Buddy: having you in the family is a delight. Thank you for your wisdom, discernment, hugs, and godliness.

I'm thankful for champ. He's been a good buddy to have during D.R.'s rotation hours.

I'm thankful for Grace Community Church. Our spiritual family. It's been a church body that I've grown the most because of. I love and know Christ more because of this body. You sharpen me, convict me, encourage me, correct me and continue to point me to the all-sufficient One.

I'm thankful for the ability to dance still. It's been a longtime passion of mine. I'm not one of those dancers who says "I feel most alive when I'm dancing". That's not true. Dance is a gift; an expression of art and life. But it is not my life. Dance has taught me that like most things in life, passions can become idols. God has granted me the grace to continue teaching dance because it's a way to express my devotion to Him. And so I am thankful I get to do that.

Most of all, I'm eternally thankful that the Creator of the universe thought of me and came to earth to purchase my salvation with His blood. I'm so glad He came and made a way for me to be with Him forever. I'll never grasp, this side of heaven, what it took for Him to pardon my sin. But now I get to be His child- his daughter. I get to sit at His feet and receive forgiveness and love. That's love I'll never be able to give; only receive.

And now for some little-ditty thanks :)
*bath and body works soap
*starbucks peppermint mocha
*iPod
*boots
*sunsets
*people who snort when they laugh (ahem... Jamie Shoe)
*sharpies
*sytycd
*target
*wildflowers in my backyard
*worship music
*kiwi

1 Chronicles 16:8
Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name; make known among the nations what he has done.

Forced Apology

2009-10-14T14:41:00.000-04:00

"I will sing of the Lord's great love forever; with my mouth I will make Your faithfulness known through all generations." Psalm 89:1

"Observe...all the commands I'm giving you...teach them to your children; talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down & when you get up." Deuteronomy 11:8a,19

"But because of your stubbornness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God's wrath, when His righteous judgment will be revealed." Romans 2:5

Ok now let me share how these verses are directly correlated to what the Lord has been teaching me lately.

This past weekend was my grandfather's 90th birthday. So DR & I packed the car and headed north 7 hours to Chattanooga, TN for a short but sweet 2 days. My dad & aunt planned a birthday celebration for papa on Saturday with old friends, new friends and family. Good Tennessee BBQ, a gospel quartet, a slide slow of papa's life and lots of rich conversation. It was a blessed time celebrating his 90 years. I was looking forward to spending time with papa this weekend: to hear about what the Lord has done over 9 decades, two marriages, 3 kids, 6 grandkids and a growing number of great-grandkids. After the party, I snuck in a few sweet minutes with papa as he told me about both love & sorrow he's experienced in his life.

Unexpectedly he opened up his heart about his marriage with my grandmother. She was a woman of high expectation. He spoke of her impecable ability to keep a house tidy and efficient. He praised her for being a wonderful mother to their three children and for being involved at church. But then he told me something that made his face turn very sad. He said, "Danelle, never once during our 65 years of marriage did she admit she was wrong and apologize." WHAT? I said back to him. "Really? wow" He said he believes the Lord enabled him to have an extra dose of patience to stay faithful to her. "Many men would've left."

Well, YEA! Geez, I was so hurt for him thinking of all those years never hearing the words, "I'm sorry honey. Please forgive me." NEVER. I mean how did the woman call herself a Christian? How she could live with herself feeling no remorse after saying cruel words or doing cruel actions is beyond me.

He recalled a time when he threw her a surprise party with family and friends and directly after the party she told him if he ever did something like that again, she would leave him. She never wanted to be the center of attention but man....what a threat! Papa said he felt he could never "do" for ma (my name for my grandmother). She was self-sufficient, independant and worse...unrepentant.

It's a sad & frustrating thing to be around someone who is never sorry for the wrong they commit. Admittedly, I have developed a bad habit of not apologizing immediately after I wrong D.R. He has to bring it back up and then I apologize. Of course it's not real or heart-felt. I'm a stubborn booger sometimes! I've had an unrepentant heart lately. I don't want to own up to that harsh thing I said or did. I justify in my mind that I'm not wrong b/c he too said something or did something wrong. Like a two year old, I pretend like the offended person will just forget it and come love on me! Wrong. I don't think it's a coincidence that God allowed papa & I to have that short conversation about ma this past weekend to open my eyes to my own unrepentant heart with my husband. I do not want to be an 80 year old who has sown pride so deep down in her heart that she is unable to let another point out her sin. Lord, please break the generational sin of pride & unrepentance with me!

The verse from Deuteronomy has been a great reminder of how I'm supposed to parent one day. I'm thankful to have a mother & father who've pointed me towards the commands of God & how to keep all of them. The verse in Psalm 89 reminds me that I must sing of God's faithfulness my whole life long and to all generations, not just my children but my children's children and their children. Papa has done this and I'm so thankful.

The verse in Romans is a warning to heed. I don't want to store up wrath for myself by not repenting. No thanks. But man! That is the seriousness of it! I'm storing up wrath (which I deserve) for myself from a just God when I'm stone cold and refuse to repent.

Generational sin is real. I've seen it in my family and others. Find out what it is in your family and ask the Lord to let it end with you.

Papa experienced years of disunity in his marriage simply b/c ma was unwilling to have a repentant heart. Years after my grandmother passed, papa married another woman who was more than gracious in word and deed. God gave papa a few years of romance. love and appreciation in his marriage with Mary. I'm so thankful for those years he had with her before she also passed.

All for now. :)

Grace & Peace.

Don't You Know I've Always Loved Her

2009-09-24T11:06:00.000-04:00

Kirstie Kylene is my sister and I couldn't love and respect her more. My love for her started on January 20, 1987 and has grown over the last 22 & 1/2 years. She's probably the only person who knows my "unmentionable" flaws and has seen my broken heart over and over.

In our childhood years, she was my shadow and I adored it! I got the privilege of being her older sister and modeling all things ladylike (and often un-ladylike). :) She made me feel that I was way cooler than I actually was b/c she wanted to do and wear everything I did.

She was always more fearless than I. For example, one Memorial Day weekend at River Ranch (a fond camping ground we went to 2-3 times a yr.) she chased a baby pig through the poopy mucky mud and wrestled it to the ground; dragged the thing by it's hind legs into a fenced in ring and did all with a grin. We have a picture of her covered in pig dung up to her belly button and she has the biggest cheesy smile on her little face. That's Kirstie. Fearless.

In our teen years, she was a confidante, an intimate comrade and an accountability partner. I remember several occasions when I was humbled and convicted deeply of my sin (which usually involved a boyfriend) from her simply words of love and concern. She was a voice of admonishment even then. God used her all throughout my teen years to sharpen me like iron. I've been broken with her, shed sorrowful & joyful tears with her, and laughed my hardest with her. It's a unique sister relationship. I've never felt a competitive spirit in me when it comes to her and that is utter grace from the Lord. I've simply felt love and admiration for her.

Through college, she was there to listen to all the fun life changes going on in my life: living in a dorm, new roommate, rushing for a sorority, meeting lots of guys & gals, fraternity parties, dance team, ect. I tried to convince her to come to Samford but the Lord was calling her to PBA. Our friendship deepened during her college years as God really stretched her in leading small groups and mentoring younger girls.

She was the first person I called in Feb. of 2006 when I started officially dating the man I knew I would marry. She was also the first person I called on February 10, 2007 when I got engaged to that man, D.R. McNew. She shared in my excitement with so much joy in her voice; I wanted to reach through the phone and hug her!

She stood by me on the most important day of my life: the day I became a wife; August 18, 2007. She supported and loved me through a difficult engagement and faithfully prayed for the unity of D.R. & I. I couldn't be more thankful for those prayers.

We share so much: our fashion, our sense of humor, our thoughts about: God, guys, purity, marriage, modesty, parents.

God is good to give us sisters. I sure got blessed with a great one. I look forward to see our friendship grow in maturity and common love for our Savior and for people. She has a beautiful heart. I look forward to the day when I will stand next to her as Matron of Honor and support her as a wife and some day mother.

"As iron sharpens iron, so one [sister] sharpens another." Proverbs 27:17

a bag of popcorn & the gospel

2009-09-08T15:35:00.000-04:00

So as I'm driving home from a funeral on my lunch break this afternoon, crying my eyes out b/c I'm so affected by these parents love for their deceased, unborn child of 5 months, I taste my salty tears and suddenly become hungry for a salty snack. I know, what a shift of emotions, right? Well God had a plan.... hang in there with me. LOL

So I pull over at the Citgo gas station right next to our church and mosey on in to find my salty fix. I spot white cheddar popcorn and begin to salivate. haha

At first I reach for the 99 cent BIG bag- back label 15 grams fat EIGHTEEN % daily fat intake. I decided to search for a smaller fattening portion. And then, I look down. On the bottom rack (strategically placed where no one with raging snack hunger would look) is 35 cent bags of assorted salty snacks.....yes, 35 CENTS! And amidst the pork rinds and dill pickle flavored chips was one Brim's white cheddar popcorn bag. It was glorious. Small portion. Small price. BIG flavor! I paid my 35 some odd cents and walked happily out the door. Stuffed them into my purse and drove the 100 yards to my church office door.

Once in my office, I wasted no time in popping the bag open and indulging. After the first handful, I turned the bag around to check the nutritional value... eh, nothing to make me grow big and strong but oh the flavor!!!

As my eyes glance down the back label of the bag, all the way down on the left hand side was a Bible verse. Yes, a BIBLE verse!

John 17:3 "and this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou has sent."

How cool is that!? I thought, "God, you always show up in the most peculiar places but this takes the cake."

Although, I enjoyed the fattening, delicious snack, I was left with a deeper satisfaction; my spiritual hungry was quenched far beyond my physical hunger. God had once again spoken to me and left me feeling like all I need is Him. He gives life and life ETERNAL.

Where has God shown up in your life lately?

If you do not work, you shall not eat!

2009-08-26T16:15:00.000-04:00

I just witnessed something very sad, but sobering.

A man whom we, here at my church, have been assisting financially came in today. We haven't seen him in over 2 months. His green shirt and over-sized blue jeans are heavily stained, his shoulders look more obvious because his frame seemed smaller to me. The bones under his shirt are more visible than at his last visit.

He got a job back in May at a car dealership service center doing detailing. I remember the day he got hired... You would've thought he won the lottery. He came in... nice khaki pants, dress shirt and tie and had a smile like I had never seen before on his face. After using our phone to call the service manager, he hung up, did a little happy-happy-joy-joy dance and said "I got the job!" I was so happy for him. This was huge for him and his family. This meant money for food and bills. He was then told by our deacons that until he showed some responsibility on his part financially, we would not be assisting him with groceries or anything else. This was 4 months ago.

He has since come in a couple times asking for a bag of groceries and each time I am forced to reiterate the agreement the deacons and him had come to at this point. He would try again a few weeks later and... same routine. It was quite draining and quite sad. He started being late to work. I know this because he walks to work and has to pass by our church playground to get there. So he wound up on "probation" at work as a warning of his tardiness. He finally got pink-slipped for using fowl language with his boss and is now unemployed again.

He came in today asking for a bag of groceries and I didn't know if that policy was still standing since it had been so long. I walked back to the kitchen but decided to call Nick our head deacon. He insisted on speaking with him. From what I gathered from their conversation, Nick was trying to reiterate the agreement and it wasn't being taken well. The conversation turned ugly and the guy said, " I thought you were a man of God but I just don't know. " He abruptly got off and walked out of the church. I felt mixed feelings of sadness and frustration. I know that the deacons are doing the best thing for him in restricting assistance in hopes that he will show some responsibility on his own. I have to trust that he will one day see that they loved him by keeping the food from him. But for now, he doesn't see that. All he sees is an "uncharitble" church. I thought about the fact that he may be tempted to steal food for his family. Or worse, rob someone. I thought of the despair and anger that he must be feeling for the way his life is because of the choices he's made. But I wonder if he realizes that to work is to live. We were put on this earth to work. It says in the Bible that the one who does not work, shall not eat. That's a pretty harsh reality but as we see by evidence of the homeless on the streets, that holds true. You have to earn a living. For some it comes easier than others. And for some it is handed to them and they are careless with their fortunes. But work is a gift. It's not just a command in order to obey God but more than that it is a way to be in fellowship with God. God is honored when we work; when we serve people; when we are responsible with our money; and when we choose to give that money (that God owns in the first place) back to Him. Work is a way to be in communion with your Creator! That takes the duty out of the equation and makes it a delight! I wish I viewed my job as a delight every day but I don't. I forget that my job is a gift and a means of fellowship with my Lord. I see it as an obligation; a requirement to pay bills and a 5 day/40 hour "community service" kinda thing. After all, I get to work at my church!! I mean, how cool is that!? I'm super blessed to be surrounded by men & .... well men who love the Lord and are spending time with Him throughout their day in their work. So, I guess I write this post to say: God has given us a means of fellowship with Him through the gift of work and we should view it as such or we are missing out on 40+ hours a week of God-glorifying obedience.

Tomorrow is another day, praise God. I will receive a complete new set of mercies from Him and I can't wait to see them at my workplace. Now if I could only take that mercy and show it to someone else.....

The truth about the Gospel

2009-08-20T10:50:00.001-04:00

This is the most powerful sermonette I've ever listened to. Souls are perishing every minute. Make sure your soul will not.

The Fire by Nate Pfeil