light meets the dark

Sometimes I feel like my heart is just going to leap out of my chest. Like it's pounding so hard that it might just rip me apart and leave my body lifeless. There are things I've learned about some of the teenage girls, here at the school I work for, that would make you vomit.... or at least cry. The dark place that these girls have lived in is simply, demonic. Utter godlessness. They didn't choose the family they grew up in. They didn't DO anything to deserve their past.

But it happened.

It happened to them. It's their story.

And it's how God got a hold of them.

Sometimes the story of salvation has to begin with pain. For some it doesn't happen as a young grade school child in Sunday school who all of a sudden has fresh eyes to John 3:16 and understands God's gift of grace in Jesus. Sometimes it has to start with tears, with "why me?"s, with darkness.

But then, one day, it's as if a sliver of the blinds lets a small stream of light in and gives a glimpse of hope. And then all of a sudden, the blinds are pulled back and the Light consumes the darkness; laying bare all it's lies and chains and scars. And the funny thing is....we still choose the darkness. The Light is illuminating, warm, comforting and yet we choose the cold, damp, sticky, sin-infested darkness. Because it's comfortable. Because it's the only choice we CAN make apart from the indwelling Holy Spirit.

It's funny how the darkness actually makes the Light more beautiful. The contrast accentuates it's brilliance. Nature does this on it's own but us humans...we like our darkness. Praise be to God that he plucked these girls out of the darkness and gave them Light.

Gave them Himself.

Their circumstances haven't drastically changed but their hearts have. They have joy, real God-given joy to face whatever God brings their way. They are even learning to "count it all joy"- past and present trials. I have loved seeing these girls grow in their love for our Savior. I love that I get to remind them that He is not only in the rainbows but in the storm.

He's right there.

Holding them. Carrying them through it.

These girls are helping me see God's faithfulness. Their stories are heart-breaking but the redemption is sweet.

Thank you God for your steadfast love and mercy.

Help us to not only thank you for the patience in the storm but to thank you FOR the storm itself. For by it we are transformed from one degree of Godliness to another.

Sara Groves and the Sovereignty of God

I love Sara Groves. She's one of my favorite artists. Her songs are deep reflections of the human heart. Her songs are life-giving and God-glorifying. You may be in the middle of a valley right now and it feels like the walls are crashing in from all sides. Let me remind you that He is in control. He has a plan. He uses what man intends for evil for our good and His glory. Hold on. Open your hands. Trust His goodness.

"Open my Hands"
I believe in a blessing I don't understand
I've seen rain fall on the wicked and the just
Rain is no measure of his faithfulness
He withholds no good thing from us
No good thing from us, no good thing from us

I believe in a peace that flows deeper than pain
That broken find healing in love
Pain is no measure of his faithfulness
He withholds no good thing from us
No good thing from us, no good thing from us

I will open my hands, will open my heart
I will open my hands, will open my heart
I am nodding my head an emphatic yes
To all that You have for me

I believe in a foundation that will never dry
Though I've thirsted and didn't have enough
Thirst is no measure of his faithfulness
He withholds no good thing from us
No good thing from us, no good thing from us

schedules, turkey & sweat

While D.R. has been gone, I have kept my own schedule..uninterrupted. I work till 4, I run till 5:30/6, I go to the grocery store or pick up a cheap meal, I make/eat dinner, I shower, I facebook/read/blog/online xmas shop/play with champ/phone-chat, I go to bed. I'm a creature of habit as I believe we all are and I get frustrated when my schedule is interrupted. Example: being on vacation in the mountains unable to find a location to run or eating too late at night and then going to bed feeling like the Macy's Day parade balloons. I don't adjust well to situations like that. I get stressed out and irritated when I can't sweat a few days in a row. My stomach starts churning, my muscles get tight and I don't sleep as well. Next week is Thanksgiving and I'll be home in Boynton Beach, Fl with my mom & dad. It'll be weird being there for a holiday without D.R. AND without my sister in the house. This year it's just mom, dad & I. I know that to an extent I can "keep my schedule" but I pray I can be more flexible and go-with-the-flow. And oh the food.....

So in a week, we will all be getting intimate with a gravy boat (or I know I will). I'm looking forward to the good eats but my conscience is heavy thinking about the time I will need to put in to work off those excess calories.



Enter Pure Barre. Along with my new found love of running, this work-out is a calorie-burning sweat-fest! I can't say enough about it. The burning, muscle-shaking is addictive. I've been running more than pure barring and I got back to it Wednesday night and boy did my muscles miss it. The instant tight toned feeling it gives my arms, legs, glutes, & core is satisfying and you know you worked out hard when your carpet has a visible wet spot from the dripping sweat. (which champ licks up, gross)
So ladies, get your rear in gear. Don't be defeated over the green bean casserole-turduken-sweet potato souffle-pecan pie indulgence. Buy the $10.72 Pure Barre 1 DVD and feel empowered. All you need is a light set of weights (2-5 lbs) and a stable support such as the back of a chair or counter top. You'll have a clear conscience going into Thanksgiving and a clear one if you continue. It's worth it!

Viva PB! and Happy Friday! Enjoy the weekend!

let's merry!

It feels like people around here are skipping right over Thanksgiving and celebrating Christmas already. Which is kinda sad b/c I love Thanksgiving BUT it's also making me happy b/c the red cups are back!!!


i LOVE, not like but LOVE Starbucks holiday drinks. Like, you don't understand. It's everything I can do to resist going every chilly morning through the drive-thru to get a skinny, tall peppermint mocha with an extra shot. Yum. Or a caramel apple cider. Slap your grandma good!

Tomorrow-Sunday between the hours of 2-5pm it's buy one holiday drink, get the second one of = or lesser value for FREE! Take your spouse, bff or kid and take advantage!! Happy Wednesday and show some luv to the Bux!

during the next month

D.R. left this morning for San Antonio, TX. He is going for his Officer Basic Leadership Course training (OBLC- b/c everything is an acronym in the Army) He will be gone until December 6th. 4 whole weeks. My heart is sad and dreading the loneliness at night. I know it will make me miss him, appreciate him, love him more but it hurts to say goodbye to your other half. As of yesterday morning, we still weren't sure if D.R. was going to OBLC due to complications with his orders with the Army. So so so much red tape to go through when you are "special" like D.R. is. Let's see if I can explain this right...
He is one of the few Army employees who is directly commissioned by the federal government/President. The Warrior Training Center on Ft. Benning needed a medical professional for their battalion. So his position was created out of necessity and there are only about 100 spots like his in the Army. Because of his specialness, being employed on the federal level & being a Nat'l Guard member on the state level, he can't be on two sets of "orders" Orders= a "belonging" status; an issued responsibility of employment. D.R. had to come off of his P.A. federal orders and temporarily be put on Nat'l Guard training orders. (to prevent double-dipping and legal issues) Anywho....confusing. I was so upset at the higher up dudes that didn't get this taken care of months ago.
If not for D.R.'s battalion colonel (Mr. Siter), who made some "calls" and got it taken care of, he wouldn't have been able to go today. It says something that this man got it all done in one weekend when this paperwork usually takes 2-3 weeks to get approved. Helps to have friends in high places of authority.

So D.R. is about to land in San Antonio, go to his hotel and get settled in and mentally prepare for a 5:30a.m. P.T. test. Poor guy. His hinny is going to be whipped into shape. I'm so thankful that our friend Geoff Gunn will be there with him. Some familiarity will help D.R. make it through.

I plan on using this time to work on D.R.'s Christmas gift (which I'm really excited about!), spend time with my high school girl's Bible study group (I'm taking them shopping in Atlanta Friday!), train a little harder to run a 1/2 marathon possibly in February, eat more vegetarian "funky" meals (that D.R. will have nothing to do with) read my Bible more often, and catch up with old friends on the phone.


Here is a yummy vegetarian meal I found on one of my favorite food blogs: Eat 80/20.

http://www.eat8020.com/2011/11/80-spaghetti-squash-tacos.html

I think I'm going to start eating 4 vegetarian meals a week and only eat 3 dinners with meat. I feel much better and not so weighed down when I fill up on veggies instead of lots of chicken or beef. We'll see how that goes.

We are headed to the Blue Ridge Mountains this afternoon with my sweet in-laws. I am looking forward to soaking in the beautiful fall weather and just relaxing on the cabin porch.

Exciting News: D.R.'s cousin had their second little girl yesterday. Elinor Faith Frye joined the world weighing 7lb.7ounces. Healthy and adorable. Congratulations Grace & Justin! We can't wait to meet her!

Break-ups

I talked with a student today about her break up with her boyfriend of over a year. She's struggling and I really had no profound words. I've been there. I've felt that hurt that feels like it's going to last forever. I've felt the guilt and wondered what I could've done better... different. Then I found these wise words from a friend/musician, Mike Donahey. This is what he told a friend of his that recently went through a break-up.

"Bro.
Don’t give up.
I can definitely understand the hurt man.
I’ve been there.
And I do know this, remember that though hurt is used by God,
it is still in its essence, unnatural.
It is a result of the fall, of the fracture that happened
in our union with God when we wanted to take control.
Be encouraged friend,
this is not how it’s always going to be.
And I know that losing this girl feels like you’ve lost
all of yourself, but here’s the good news,
and maybe bad news depending on how you look at it,
but I’ve been married for almost 2 years now, and I’ve
been surprised to find that my wife can’t make me happy.
I mean, she’s awesome, don’t get me wrong,
but the problem is that I’m just made for more than
even she can give me.
And so, I’ve had to come to terms with the fact, that
since God loves me, he won’t let me be completely happy
with anything other than Himself.
Yes, It’s painful, but it’s good.
I can promise you that.
If you think of it, I’d really suggest a book to you
called, “A Severe Mercy”
Basically, this dude loses his wife to cancer I think,
and he realizes that it was the severe mercy of God
that allowed it to happen, because basically,
she was his God. He didn’t know it at the time,
but the most merciful thing God could do was to take
her from him, because only God can last beyond this life.
Only God Himself can satisfy.
And yes, we have to walk through the midnight hour of
the soul to get there sometimes, but what you’ll find
on the other side is so much better. it’s so much more free.
Could you imagine, if God Himself was all we needed to be content?
What could mortal man do to us?
What could anyone take away?
They couldn’t.
They can’t.
Hang it there bro,
we’re just strangers here while we walk this earth,
and there’s light on the other side of this."