heavy & light

first the heavy:

I cried today in church thinking about what God saved me from. It's not often that I ponder the present agony of the unbelieving who have died but today I did. There are a few people in my own family whom I can't be confident trusted in Christ before they died. What a horrible, horrible thought. I deserve what they are receiving right now. I am no better. Only, God saw fit to spare me. To spare D.R. To spare Kirstie, my sister and her husband Aaron. To spare my cousin-in-laws Grace Frye & Betty Morris and their husbands.And others... All because of Christ. Who would I be without Christ? To think of not being able to have fellowship with God on a daily basis- to not be able to stop in my car and talk to my Abba when I'm fearful or frustrated- to not know the deep covenant intimacy in marriage that only knowing Christ can provide- to not know that when natural disasters like hurricanes, tornados, mudslides and earthquakes happen that there is One who is still in sovereign control of it all. He is the only source of peace.


dangit! I'm crying again. He's such a big God. We don't understand Him. I'm so glad I don't. He is a glorious, wonderful mystery. And the thing is....no one, of their own accord, has even TRIED to understand Him. "None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God. All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one." Romans 13:11-12

We sang this song today. It has a somber, funeral-like mood but it is so powerful. I cry and am hardly able to sing all the way through once it hits me: how powerful, mighty and fear-worthy our God is.

"Let all mortal flesh keep silence,
And with fear and trembling stand;
Ponder nothing earthly minded,
For with blessing in His hand,
Christ our God to earth descendeth,
Our full homage to demand.

King of kings, yet born of Mary,
As of old on earth He stood,
Lord of lords, in human vesture,
In the body and the blood;
He will give to all the faithful
His own self for heavenly food.

Rank on rank the host of heaven
Spreads its vanguard on the way,
As the Light of light descendeth
From the realms of endless day,
That the powers of hell may vanish
As the darkness clears away.

At His feet the six wingèd seraph,
Cherubim with sleepless eye,
Veil their faces to the presence,
As with ceaseless voice they cry:
'Alleluia, Alleluia
Alleluia, Lord Most High!;"


On a lighter note, I made some really good pizza and granola (not eaten in the same meal) this weekend. I'll post the recipes and pics soon. :)