Drive It Out!

*just an aside. If you are a faithful blog follower, by now you have come to realize that you may be waiting weeks inbetween posts from this gal. I'm not a day by day journaler, though I would like to be. I converse with God easily in my own head and sometimes I think if I got it out on paper or screen, no one would really understand but God. lol so I will stick to writing about my instances of growth: those times in my life when I learn something about God, about love, about forgiveness or kindness. I will document those simply because I want to remember them and learn from them. Stones of remembrance that remind me of God's goodness to me. Here's the current thing my flesh is battling.

Fear.

There is no fear in love...

Wait, you mean I can't be "cautious" with my heart and truly love someone? I can't protect myself and guard myself and still love the person who doesn't know Christ? I don't have a right to be afraid of the guy who walks in off the street wanting food and starring blankly at me.

No.

1 John 4 says that 'we know and rely on the love God has for us.' We RELY on it. Do I really rely on God for His love to consume me so much that it blots out fear? Do I live each day believing that God will protect me from harm because I am in the center of His will for my life? Not often enough.

I have been fearful at work. The church is a haven for me; a safe place of surrender and mercy even during the week as I work; but lately I have begun to fear the people whom I should be loving the most. I fear the lost. I fear the homeless man who smells like trash and cigarettes. I judge them because I fear them. I think I've been using my fear as a way to justify the judgment I pass. Fear is crippling and I know I wasn't created to feel this way. I know that because it hurts. I hate being fearful. It makes it painful to love somebody.

A homeless man came into the church today wanting some help with transportation but really what he wanted was just to talk to someone. He's been coming for a while and clearly doesn't know the Lord because there is no hope in him. He's always a talker but today he seemed different. He had a desperate, hopeless, lost-puppy look in his eye that said, "Does God care about me?" But instead of encouraging him with scripture and telling him the promises of God, I was wondering if he had a knife in his pocket. Or if he got a gun somewhere and was so depressed that he might not be thinking straight. I was so scared honestly that I was frozen to my chair. I didn't even want to reach for the phone when it rang. I was consumed with fear. I was not trusting God's provision over me. I was not believing that God loved me enough to care about the situation I was in and calm my nerves.

'God is love.' Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love DRIVES OUT fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because He first loved us.' 1 john 4:16b-19a

This tells me that I have the ability to love people as Christ loves me! I just have to choose to let the Holy Spirit love through me. I need to be praying each morning that God will give me a spirit of love for these lost sheep and that His love in me would drive my fear far away.

I love the promises of God. They are so rich and so many! Speaking of rich, I am really craving something sweet. I may have to go steal more candy from my husband's easter basket, AGAIN. ha poor guy.

A.N.T.H.E.M.

This is from John Piper's website.
Strategies for Fighting Lust: I know as women we think, "we don't deal with that. That's a man's problem." But let's be honest ladies; we battle a fantasy world too complete with thoughts of that cute actor in that chick flick we watched or that hot doctor in the show on t.v. or even the attractive man at church with the cute kids. We fight it too. I know I do. I'm sick of my flesh winning. I thought this was great and I love acronyms. They help to recall it easier. I hope this benefits you in your struggle to "make no provision for the flesh". (Rm 13:14)

A-avoid sights and situations that arouse unfitting desire."Flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness" (2 Timothy 2:22).

N- say NO! "Resist the devil and HE WILL flee from you." James 4:7 What a great promise!

T- turn my mind forcefully toward Christ as the superior satisfaction. Saying "No" will not suffice. You must turn your mind from defense to offense. Attack the promises of sin with the promises of Christ.

H- hold the promises of Christ fimly in my mind until it pushes the image out. Fight for as long as it takes. Imagine a garage door was coming down on your toddler; you would hold that door up and yell for help for as long as it took to save your child.

E- enjoy a superior satisfaction. Cultivate pleasure for Christ alone. He is appealing! Psalm 90:14 "Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days."

M- move into a useful activity away from idleness and other vulnerable behaviors. 1 Corinthians 15:58 "Be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord."

Unceasing Joy, Unceasing Sorrow

March 25, 2009 | By: John Piper

It is not a sign of a seasoned Christian soul that steady joy is untinged with steady sorrow.

Or to put it positively, the seasoned soul in Christ has a steady joy and a steady sorrow.

They protect each other. Joy is protected from being flippant by steady sorrow. Sorrow is protected from being fatal by steady joy.

And they intensify each other. Joy is made deeper by steady sorrow. Sorrow is made sweeter by steady joy.

For the seasoned Christian soul, I do not see how it can be otherwise while people are perishing and we are saved. I do not see how it can be otherwise while these two passages are written by the same inspired man:

I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart. For I could wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ for the sake of my brothers, my kinsmen according to the flesh. (Romans 9:2-3)

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. (Philippians 4:4)

An exciting trip

D.R. & I went to NYC Saturday-Wednesday during his spring break. It was a lot of fun. We had both never been before so naturally we wanted to see all the sights. We stayed in Times Square at the DoubleTree. D.R. requested a high up room so we could have a good view. We started out Saturday by just walking around. Walking was the main way we got around. There is so much to see down every street but boy were our legs tired by dinner time. We visited the Empire State Building, took the Staten Island Ferry to see the Statue of Liberty, walked through the financial district, took a picture with the bull, visited the World Trade Center Memorial museum next to Ground Zero, saw two broadway shows (Mamma Mia and Guys & Dolls), visited grand central station, the UN, strolled through central park and ate a hotdog, and snuck in some shopping inbetween :). And of course the food was awesome. We ate NY pizza (thin crust is the bomb). I like it super thin so I can fold it over and eat it. :) We made our way down to Little Italy and China town to sample the fare. Both amazing! Anyone we goes to NY has to eat in those two places. We also found a great little sushi restaurant right off Broadway called Aoki. It was such a cool place and great sushi! Our last night we ate Brazilian and man oh man what a feast. Tons of juicy steak, yuca (brazilian root thing... taste like french fry), platanos, black beans, and rice. Oh and some yummy passion mango juice. It was worth the ticket.

On Sunday night we went to a church service at Hunter College where Tim Keller speaks to college students (mainly). It was a blessing to fellowship with other believers in a city so filled with materialism and seemingly hopeless people. Tim Keller pastors Redeemer Presbyterian Church in Manhattan. He helped me study Galatians. :)

I will never forget this trip with my husband. It was so exciting and special. I definitely want to come back (maybe with some girls so I can shop more and see more Broadway :))

Grace? Betty? any takers?

him

This is D.R. McNew.

He's my husband.

He's charming. He's intelligent. He's handsome. He's logical. He's goofy. He's compassionate. He's challenging. He's always growing. He's inspiring. He's frustrating. (c'mon he's MY husband) I love him.

That's all.

Oh, Step Sing practice......

I miss this. I can't wait to go to Step Sing in a week! Zeta, let's bring that sweepstakes home this year!!!!

A Bit of Transition

Hello all! Sorry it's been over a week since I last wrote. Life happens, ya know? And boy did it change for me this past week.

Last Monday, my boss at the real estate co. called me into her office and regrettably told me that they were having to cut my hours back since the company as a whole was suffering from this economy. I was very understanding but at the same time bummed. I knew this would squeeze DR & I a bit financially but I was confident that we would be alright. That night I sent an email to a bunch of ladies from my church, asking for prayer and inquiring about any job positions they knew of. Tuesday morning, our church administrator, Jen called me and asked if I would like to come in and talk to Pastor Jim about her position which will be available soon since she is way prego and due Feb. 19th! I said, "sure".

Now, this church position has been available (on the low down) for a couple months. At the beginning when I knew they would be looking for someone, I was intrigued and thought, "hey, a job at the church....sounds awesome." But after wrestling with my feelings of inadequacy I determined that I was not cut out for the job. I don't view myself as a detail-oriented, super communicative person and that was basically the job description in a nut shell. Well, God wasn't going to let me loose on this. And He sure wasn't going to let me think I had any credentials of my own to offer, cuz I don't! After meeting with a much trusted friend over lunch on Tuesday (1/27) I gained a renewed sense of where my confidence is found- in Christ alone.

His power is made perfect in my weakness (and inadequacy). So why should I limit what God can do with me? I was certain that I should go forth with the interview.

Wednesday morning I met with Jen and Pastor Jim and discussed the job description in full. Thursday I met with two elders and Pastor Jim to discuss what's expected a little more in depth. At the end of that meeting, I was offered the job. Two hours later, after discussing it with D.R., I accepted with a great peace in my heart and an indescribable excitement in me.

I still have those feelings of doubt arise at times, but I know that God is able to extinguish them. When He calls, He equips. He never calls the seemingly "equipped" so that it's nothing we can boast in. I know some of you may be struggling with feelings of "I just can't do this. I'm not fit to be.....(fill in the blank). " "Someone else is better suited to do this." The enemy will try to tell us we are not capable of things but God says in His word that with Him ALL things are possible. Not some. ALL things. That's a promise from God! How encouraging! I am going to choose to believe that as I start my new job at Grace Community Church as the church administrator. God is the one who will be speaking through me and willing me to work with excellence for Him.

So be obedient when you're called! It's scary. The path is uncertain. But our God will be a lamp for our feet and a light for our path.

For now, I must be faithful to finish my time here with the real estate co. and work as hard as possible to leave a positive imprint. I need to remember that God can receive glory anywhere, and SHOULD receive it all places. Work for the Lord, not for men.

I hope everyone has a joyFULL rest of the week.