For my joy and His glory

I've been thinking a lot about the power of Christ lately. His power to heal, to destroy, to tame, to separate, to allow two people to fall in love, to take life, to give life. In all these things, one thing is constant.... the purpose. Why does God allow evil and why doesn't He pour out more good? What are His purposes when he allows hurt in our lives? God has so graciously been revealing this answer to me; it's for His glory. Everything that happens is because of Him, through Him and for Him. No one can pull a quick one on our Creator. He exists to make much of Himself and he chooses to use little me to accomplish that. What an honor that our heavenly Father gives to us to be the workmen of His mighty plan. We, as humans cannot see the fullness of God's plan but it's for that very reason that we choose to obey Him; for the day will come when we will see as He sees. We will understand all that He meant for our good which appeared so evil.

I've started to realize, through the meditation on the Word, that followers of Christ were followers b/c they sought to magnify Christ. They did this not as a duty of their calling but as a DELIGHT. "For the joy set before them..." they shared the gospel. It was fun for them! They received the reward and Christ received the glory! Hedonistic? In every sense of the word. Paul, for example, knew how to pursue his own joy IN Christ. For a long time I considered this selfish. I had such a martyr-istic view of Paul. It seemed unattainable to live like he did- to suffer & find the joy all along. But God called him by name from birth and even when he was blaspheming the scriptures & studying them zealously so as to mock them, God was at work. God was equipping Paul to serve Him when he was an atheist. How amazing!! After Paul is converted on the road to Damascus, (Acts 9) he receives joy which he's never felt before. (Anyone can feel happy, but only the power of God can give you joy) From there on out, Paul is on a hot pursuit for his joy and for the Lord's glory! These two happen simultaneously. We only feel true joy when we bring the Lord glory and God only receives glory when we are truly joyful!

This powerful realization has radically changed my daily priorities. Instead of praying, "Lord, let me help someone today." or "Lord, keep my husband safe today.", the first thing I pray is "Lord, help me to be happy in You today." I now realize that like Paul, the most important thing is being happy in the Lord.

So, each day, instead of first praying for your family's health, your job, your marriage, your children, or the lost,.....pray for yourself and for the pursuit of joy in Christ which gives Him the most glory.

P.S. John Piper's Desiring God is a wonderful book. Pick up a copy for your reading delight!

the REWARD of marriage

I saw the movie Fireproof with my husband a while back. I, for one, knew it would be excellent. My husband, on the other hand, wasn't so confident. But to his pleasant surprise he enjoyed it; maybe even got a little teary eyed... ok maybe not. That was me, 80% of the time.

My heart was in my throat for most of the movie not because it was "sweet" or "romantic" or anything the typical woman would say; but because I saw my own sin once again displayed in the movie couple's marriage. I've only been married for a little over a year, but during that time my life has been challenged far more than the rest of my 23 years. You see, I entered a battle field in August of 2007 when I vowed to love & cherish, for better or worse, another fleshy human until I die. Only in hindsight am I realizing that it takes a lot more effort on my part & a lot more calling on God to make it work. My life has been relatively smooth sailing pre-marriage No deaths in the family, no divorce, no hospital visits, no serious illness, no big challenges to speak of. So, God thought it was time for me to be challenged. Really challenged. Along came D.R. McNew.

If you look up the word selfish in the dictionary you might find my name. It’s not easy to share! Any married person who is striving to love and respect their spouse would agree with me. You’re raised to be independent & make independent decisions: make good grades, get into college, find a decent job, support yourself, reward yourself....... And then you get married. No longer can you just choose the kind of cereal you like or sleep with the room temperature just the way you like or watch chick flicks anytime you want; not that this is true all the time. Now you have to consider another person’s needs and wants above your own. You have to choose to treasure what they treasure; place value on what they are passionate about. It’s easy to assume they enjoy everything you enjoy; that’s the selfishness again.

Marriage is too often looked at as a 50:50 relationship. “You do your part and I’ll do mine and we’ll meet in the middle.” But this is a recipe for divorce. Only being responsible for ½ the work leaves you expecting the other ½ from your partner and when they don’t come through, you’re disappointed and angry. This is not the formula God prescribed for marriage. I am learning that if I have expectations of my husband, he will always fall short. If I choose to concentrate on what I believe he should accomplish for our marriage, then I’m failing in my role as a wife. I am responsible for myself and I am accountable to God. 1 Peter 3:1-2 says “Wives, …be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.” I love that it says without words. We women use our words as a weapon and more often as a shield against our husbands. It’s a challenge to just be quiet but this is what Peter says we are to do. And our husbands will see the reverence not just to them but to GOD when we do so!

The best thing about marriage, because there is a long list of great aspects, is the chance to become more Christ-like. Within marriage there is the opportunity to be known. This is scary but necessary in order to be made new in Christ. I never realized how many secret sins were kept in my heart until I was married. Praise the Lord for using our spouse to “find us out”. Only when our sin is exposed to the light do we have a chance to be free of it. I’m humbled over and over again. Each time I’m like, “crap, I suck” and then it’s my responsibility to change.

In the movie, there is a line that Kirk Cameron says to his dad about his wife when they are taking a walk : “How can I keep loving someone who spits in my face and rejects me over and over again?” This part of the movie was so powerful. The dad then reminds him that this is what Christ does for us. It was such a beautiful reminder of how much our Savior loves us despite our rejection of Him. Won’t you love your spouse in the same way?

a humble beginning

"While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn." Luke 2:6-7

I'm amazed a little more every year at Christmas how humble and meek Jesus' birth was. God chose a young virgin girl to give Jesus birth. She was not from a family of royalty yet God found favor with her in her humble state. (Lk.1:48) She was a servant and worked with her hands. She had nothing tangible to offer God. She honored Him with her belief. Now, I would probably laugh to the angel's face, first of all....because an ANGEL was in front of me; and second because we all know how babies are born. But what faith Mary had in her God. And talk about a priviledge!? To be the mother of Jesus the Christ. You don't have a bad report card! (side note): There are so many women pregnant right now, it's ridiculous! I'm talking at least 10 people from my church (& my church is small), a few in the family and multiple friends. They are heeding the command "be fruitful and multiple". :) And I think it must be so neat to be with child at Christmas time. To experience the joy that Mary must've had.

I haven't had children yet but I feel like I'm living vicariously through several friends. I wonder if Mary went through all the things my friends are going through? The nausea, the dizziness, the sleepless nights, the back aches, the cravings, the nail & hair growth, the hot/cold flashes. I wonder if God gave her a "normal" pregnancy like we think of it today? Or did she experience some supernatural, symptom-free pregnancy? And to ride on a donkey for hours and hours to get to a town just to register and THEN go into labor in a strange city. I wonder if she was saddened when there was not room in the Bethlehem Inn. Was she sad not to be with her family? These are all the things I know I would be feeling, but I'm sure the Lord gave them both a peace.

an aside; I found this quote just now: “So do not let it surprise you, unbelieving soul, whoever you are, do not let it strike you as impossible that a virgin should give birth, and in giving birth remain a virgin. Realize that it was God who was born, and you will not be surprised at a virgin giving birth.”
- Augustine, Sermon 370.3

I love the way Jesus was born. That night was silent and holy. The Savior of the world was born in a barn and placed in a manger (a modern day manger looks similar to a pig trough). How much more humble can you get? There was no big production. No trumpets were played. No royal feast held in his honor. But all was calm and bright. I also think it's important to point out the society classes who came to Him that night. Those of high "importance" to those of servanthood came to honor the newborn King. Three kings of different orient came to give Him gifts as well as shepherds who were keeping watch over their flocks that night. This is symbolic of Philippians 2:9-11 were every knee shall bow at the name of Jesus. Oh what a day that will be!

So as we celebrate in six days, let's be mindful of Jesus' birth. Let's remember how he came into this world: chosen by a virgin servant who put her faith in a mighty God. Let's remember that he was born in a barn and laid in a pig trough. Let's remember that he was holy and blameless even as a baby. I can get so wrapped up in the "red and green season" and forget to celebrate the most important birthday in history. Let's not put other things ahead of that birthday. Make it first priority.

"For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Isaiah 9:6

be a skeptic!

I hated to read in school. If ever there was an assignment to read and comprehend, I cringed and took as long as possible eating my after school snack. (yes, even in h.s. I had after school snacks, lay off) But since graduating, I have an insatiable hunger for reading. For a while it was Karen Kingsbury novels which are, although intriguing and tissue-worthy, also destructive emotionally for me; so I had to move on. My present delight is books about discovering sin. I know...whoo... sounds so happy and cheery. Well for me, books such as Galatians, Proverbs, Desiring God by John Piper and Growing your Faith by Jerry Bridges have been cornerstones of my Christian growth.

I just finished reading a book review on The Shack by William P. Young. I haven't read this book but now want to. I want to because I need to be more of a skeptic. I need to read books with a spirit of discernment knowing that authors are human and their work is not all God-breathed. The book review by Mat Alexander (link listed below) is one that capitalizes on the negatives or rather the doctrinal heresies of the novel. I think it's worth checking out if you are considering reading or have already read this book.

www.dwbc.org/the_shack.pdf

This section: not for word vomit.

I finally caved and started a blog. I had a really fun time decorating my page and writing about my husband, DR & I. I think this will be a healthy, fun way to get my thoughts out. Even if no one reads this, it will be good therapy for me. I'm a woman, which means naturally I have lots of thoughts and emotions. So instead of channeling those emotions through words that are sometimes unintentionally (or...ok, occasionally INtentionally) mean, I can think through those thoughts and write about them. This blog will not be a place to "vent" but rather a place to give praise, pose questions, meditate on God's truth, and wrestle with my thoughts.

And speaking of thoughts. My husband reminded me last night that they are not the enemy. It's the choice to dwell on them that becomes sin and gives the devil a foothold in our minds and hearts. But how hard is it to "take every thought captive?" as 2 Corinthians 10:5 says. Take ALL my thoughts prisoner? Lock them up and replace them with something pure? yeah, that's simple. NOT. But, I have found recently that the more I am choosing to take delight in reading God's word and bathe my mind in real, legitimate Truth, the more natural it is to combat sin. Not that sin will ever dissipate completely in my life, but having victory over an occurence of sin is so gratifying and empowering. You have to say, go God!

If you can't tell by now, I love Jesus. A little more than my husband and I'm praying that I will love him more and more than anyone else the older I get and the more I learn about him. He's a friend that never moves away, a husband that is always faithful, a parent that never abandons, a confidant like a sibling, a loving teacher, an all knowing physician, and so much more. He is everything we need. We just have to trust Him.