I have really been struggling with envying the pregnant women in my life. My husband & I are not trying to get pregnant because of still being in graduate school but I still struggle very much with wanting a child and not wanting others to have children. I found myself mistreating many pregnant friends of mine at my church by not smiling in the hallway or engaging in usual conversations. I'm the church secretary so it's an especially hard environment to be in; hearing who's pregnant and watching them bring their children to the church to Bible study during the week. I was so ugly in my actions but more ugly in my thoughts. I realized I was really wronging them by being so closed off. My jealously and envy not only hurt my relationship with God, my husband D.R., my friends but with the whole church body. I realized my sin really affects all others around me- in my case my church family. Praise be to God that where my sin was abounding, His grace abounded even stronger. He showed me my sin through other saints and I was able to repent and receive forgiveness from women I was intentionally ignoring. (Js. 4:17- ouch)
So many people have helped be part of the conviction & encouragement to root out this sin in my heart. I still struggle but I'm now accountable to God to take my jealous thoughts captive and replace them with thankfulness for all He's given; which is more than I deserve.
Grace & Peace
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Staying Healthy
I will admit lately I have developed bad eating habits. I love chips and salsa or dip (of any kind) which means I should never buy it or I'll devour it all in two days. Plus I made the mistake of buying a mix of chocolate eggs (butterfinger, crunch, caramel, milk) to put on my desk at the church (...for the kids, don't judge lol)... little satans wrapped in colored tin foil is what they are. Back to 0 cal. jolly ranchers. I'm going home this weekend and I know I'll eat more than usual as my mom cooks all my favorite things and treats me to fun restaurants. I need to exercise some self control with the snacking. It's becoming a little crazy.
On a positive note, I have started to exercise to this video called Pure Barre. It's a fusion of pilates and dance- right up my alley. It's already produced results in the backside/thigh area which is very encouraging. The lady on the video says ,"ideally you don't want your seat to look like a pancake. you want it to have some shape." Ha! Yes ma'am I do. Pancake seats are for old men, not for this 25 almost 26 yr old gal. It's really fun too- hard work but fun. Pure Barre along with teaching dance during the week has saved my figure. I'm blessed to work half days right now which allows for walks/runs at the park, doing my 45 min PB video or just stretching. Fitness always makes me feel more alive and I know I'm doing my heart some good. If interested go HERE and check our Pure Barre. Two of my sorority sisters opened a branch in Birmingham (ahem... Betty) and are fabulous at teaching. (i hear)
happy hump day (wednesday)!!!
On a positive note, I have started to exercise to this video called Pure Barre. It's a fusion of pilates and dance- right up my alley. It's already produced results in the backside/thigh area which is very encouraging. The lady on the video says ,"ideally you don't want your seat to look like a pancake. you want it to have some shape." Ha! Yes ma'am I do. Pancake seats are for old men, not for this 25 almost 26 yr old gal. It's really fun too- hard work but fun. Pure Barre along with teaching dance during the week has saved my figure. I'm blessed to work half days right now which allows for walks/runs at the park, doing my 45 min PB video or just stretching. Fitness always makes me feel more alive and I know I'm doing my heart some good. If interested go HERE and check our Pure Barre. Two of my sorority sisters opened a branch in Birmingham (ahem... Betty) and are fabulous at teaching. (i hear)
happy hump day (wednesday)!!!
Monday, April 5, 2010
i.am.so.excited. !!!!!!! I love my hometown. It's so beautiful, so fun, and so full of life. Plus I love my family so ya know-extra bonus seeing them :) Update soon to come on the trip home.
Also, random but... I love my new find at Forever XXI. and you should know i'm obsessed with that store. I am never overwhelmed like many say they are when they enter it, rather elated is the approp. word. :)
Happy Monday Everyone!
Also, random but... I love my new find at Forever XXI. and you should know i'm obsessed with that store. I am never overwhelmed like many say they are when they enter it, rather elated is the approp. word. :)
Happy Monday Everyone!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Altar Calls: Biblical?
D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones gives some answers.
1. It is wrong to put direct pressure on the will. The will should always be approached primarily through the mind, the intellect, and then through the affections. The action of the will should be determined by those influences.
2. In the end it may produce a condition in which what has determined the response of the man who ‘comes forward’ is not so much the Truth itself as, perhaps, the personality of the evangelist, or some vague general fear, or some other kind of influence.
3. The preaching of the Word and the call for decision should not be separated in our thinking
4. This method surely carries in it the implication that sinners have an inherent power of decision and of self-conversion.
5. There is an implication here that the evangelist somehow is in a position to manipulate the Holy Spirit and His work. Some organizers today even predict the results.
6. This method tends to produce a superficial conviction of sin, if any at all. People often respond because they have the impression that by doing so they will receive certain benefits.
7. You are encouraging people to think that their act of going forward somehow saves them.
8. It raises the whole question of the doctrine of regeneration. This is the most serious thing of all. This work is the work of the Holy Spirit, and His work alone, no one else can do it. And as it is His work it is always a thorough work; and it is always a work that will show itself.
9. No sinner ever really decides for Christ.
and as A.W. Tozer says "Don’t come down here to cry about it, go home and live it!"
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
No One Takes His Life
Mark 10:33-34: “See, we are going up to Jerusalem, and the Son of Man will be delivered over to the chief priests and the scribes, and they will condemn him to death and deliver him over to the Gentiles. And they will mock him and spit on him, and flog him and kill him. And after three days he will rise.”
The amazing thing about Jesus is that he is intentional with everything He does. No one is taking His life from Him. He gives it up freely. That's important to understand. If He did not offer up his life, our sin would not be atoned for. God deliberately turned His back on Jesus and let His one and only Son be falsely accused, beaten and hung on a wooden cross. I get chill bumps just thinking of it. But what blows me away is the submission of Jesus to the will of God. He is fully God and yet fully man. That means He knows all that is going to happen to Him; every person who would betray Him, every whip lash, every false word spoken about Him yet- submission the whole way through. I tend to forget the fully human part of Jesus. I know He's God/deity but He was 100% flesh and felt 100% hell for so long. I mean, He suffered my hell on that cross. And your hell, believer. Can you imagine being God and walking your Son up the mountain to His death? and then turning your back on Him? uh-no. Can you imagine (those of you w/out children) walking your dog or cat up to a mountain and sacrificing them for the sake of others? uh-no. I wouldn't give my loved one for anyone! And God gave Jesus. Sinless Jesus.
If that doesn't humble you, nothing in this world will.
On a lighter note, these are great to do with kids or just with your husband to remember the Easter story.
The amazing thing about Jesus is that he is intentional with everything He does. No one is taking His life from Him. He gives it up freely. That's important to understand. If He did not offer up his life, our sin would not be atoned for. God deliberately turned His back on Jesus and let His one and only Son be falsely accused, beaten and hung on a wooden cross. I get chill bumps just thinking of it. But what blows me away is the submission of Jesus to the will of God. He is fully God and yet fully man. That means He knows all that is going to happen to Him; every person who would betray Him, every whip lash, every false word spoken about Him yet- submission the whole way through. I tend to forget the fully human part of Jesus. I know He's God/deity but He was 100% flesh and felt 100% hell for so long. I mean, He suffered my hell on that cross. And your hell, believer. Can you imagine being God and walking your Son up the mountain to His death? and then turning your back on Him? uh-no. Can you imagine (those of you w/out children) walking your dog or cat up to a mountain and sacrificing them for the sake of others? uh-no. I wouldn't give my loved one for anyone! And God gave Jesus. Sinless Jesus.
If that doesn't humble you, nothing in this world will.
On a lighter note, these are great to do with kids or just with your husband to remember the Easter story.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Obedience: The place of joy and safety
Hello blog world. I have returned finally after a long hiatus. I blog in my head... to myself... ALL THE TIME. LoL Thoughts in my head are always more collected than when I put them on paper. It's like my relationship with God, I talk to Him a lot during the day and I learn a lot from Him during the day but do I think to write it down? No, a big mistake. So I thought it necessary to journal about this certain happening so that years from now I can look back and see the faithfulness of God. Stones of remembrance are very important to build my faith. I often forget when God has enabled me to be obedient and totally should document them so He can get the glory over and over again.
So here we go....
I have for a long while been harboring jealousy and even worse: envy (which involves malicious action) against a few people. It's been my "secret sin" that most don't see in my life. But nothing is secret from God so who was I kidding? He(God) made clear to me that this was going to be a detriment to my marriage and my relationship with others and most importantly my relationship with my God. I ignored Him for so long and kept on in sin; knowing full well what I was doing. I even read in Romans about storing up wrath for myself by disobeying the Lord and STILL I was stubborn. God even tried to use several precious women to warn me of the seriousness of this struggle and the implications of holding on to it so tightly and thinking it's "innocent". It wasn't until I had my sister holding me accountable to make a change that I felt the weight of my sin. (Js 4:17- thx Kirst) God used her mightily in this situation to convict me. I suddenly felt an urgency to take these people off my radar screen so that the temptation to sin would not be present. God enabled me to flee. And while I'm still battling the "ways around obedience" in my flesh, I can feel the peace that this act of obedience has brought and it's so worth it.
There is nothing sweeter than feeling close and intimate again with my Savior. I missed Him. It's awesome to once again feel my need for Him in such a strong way.
You know what's funny, is I have really noticed how handsome D.R. is lately. I mean he always was but man o man..... he's cute.
So here we go....
I have for a long while been harboring jealousy and even worse: envy (which involves malicious action) against a few people. It's been my "secret sin" that most don't see in my life. But nothing is secret from God so who was I kidding? He(God) made clear to me that this was going to be a detriment to my marriage and my relationship with others and most importantly my relationship with my God. I ignored Him for so long and kept on in sin; knowing full well what I was doing. I even read in Romans about storing up wrath for myself by disobeying the Lord and STILL I was stubborn. God even tried to use several precious women to warn me of the seriousness of this struggle and the implications of holding on to it so tightly and thinking it's "innocent". It wasn't until I had my sister holding me accountable to make a change that I felt the weight of my sin. (Js 4:17- thx Kirst) God used her mightily in this situation to convict me. I suddenly felt an urgency to take these people off my radar screen so that the temptation to sin would not be present. God enabled me to flee. And while I'm still battling the "ways around obedience" in my flesh, I can feel the peace that this act of obedience has brought and it's so worth it.
There is nothing sweeter than feeling close and intimate again with my Savior. I missed Him. It's awesome to once again feel my need for Him in such a strong way.
You know what's funny, is I have really noticed how handsome D.R. is lately. I mean he always was but man o man..... he's cute.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Give Thanks In All Things
This year I am thankful for too many things to count really. God has been so gracious on me and my family. I'm amazed how He provides, protects, sanctifies, heals, reconciles, and loves us unconditionally.
I'm thankful for D.R. In this second year of marriage I've noticed how generous a husband I have. He is always thinking up ways to help people who don't have the blessings we have. He has a kingdom-perspective on money which I am trying to gain more of. He makes me laugh. No one really knows the goofy, silly D.R. like I do. Shhh.... he likes to sing his thoughts to me to a familiar tune- which ever one pops to his head at the moment. I try not to act amused sometimes but my tickle bone always gets me and I burst out laughing. He's a joy. I'm blessed to have a man who fears the Lord and longs to cultivate a deeper relationship with Christ every day. I'm glad I have a husband who cares more about my sanctification and presenting me without blemish than my circumstances & often faulty emotions. There's a song that is on Sara Groves latest c.d. called Fireflies & Songs and it says "I was drawn to you in ways I can't explain. We fought like crazy but I couldn't stay away. We piled on expectations and lots of blame. ; like we couldn't do it any other way." This was the beginning of our relationship- D.R. & I..... Sara Groves is unbelievable at putting to words what I feel in my heart. Anyways... put her new c.d. on your wishlist!
I'm thankful for our family and friends who are always there. I'm extra thankful for Kirstie, my younger sister. I've written about her a few times on here. We have a strong bond that I know is only possible because of the Lord's hand. Sisters are even better when they are your best friends. Love you Kirst. Mom and dad, I couldn't love you more. Thank you for raising me to love Jesus. It has been your best gift to me. Granny, oh granny... I don't think there's a memory of you that doesn't involve hugs and uplifting words and FUN! You taught me to embrace my silliness and be myself. I'm thankful for your generosity, your kindness, your love. Buddy: having you in the family is a delight. Thank you for your wisdom, discernment, hugs, and godliness.
I'm thankful for champ. He's been a good buddy to have during D.R.'s rotation hours.
I'm thankful for Grace Community Church. Our spiritual family. It's been a church body that I've grown the most because of. I love and know Christ more because of this body. You sharpen me, convict me, encourage me, correct me and continue to point me to the all-sufficient One.
I'm thankful for the ability to dance still. It's been a longtime passion of mine. I'm not one of those dancers who says "I feel most alive when I'm dancing". That's not true. Dance is a gift; an expression of art and life. But it is not my life. Dance has taught me that like most things in life, passions can become idols. God has granted me the grace to continue teaching dance because it's a way to express my devotion to Him. And so I am thankful I get to do that.
Most of all, I'm eternally thankful that the Creator of the universe thought of me and came to earth to purchase my salvation with His blood. I'm so glad He came and made a way for me to be with Him forever. I'll never grasp, this side of heaven, what it took for Him to pardon my sin. But now I get to be His child- his daughter. I get to sit at His feet and receive forgiveness and love. That's love I'll never be able to give; only receive.
And now for some little-ditty thanks :)
*bath and body works soap
*starbucks peppermint mocha
*iPod
*boots
*sunsets
*people who snort when they laugh (ahem... Jamie Shoe)
*sharpies
*sytycd
*target
*wildflowers in my backyard
*worship music
*kiwi
1 Chronicles 16:8
Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name; make known among the nations what he has done.
I'm thankful for D.R. In this second year of marriage I've noticed how generous a husband I have. He is always thinking up ways to help people who don't have the blessings we have. He has a kingdom-perspective on money which I am trying to gain more of. He makes me laugh. No one really knows the goofy, silly D.R. like I do. Shhh.... he likes to sing his thoughts to me to a familiar tune- which ever one pops to his head at the moment. I try not to act amused sometimes but my tickle bone always gets me and I burst out laughing. He's a joy. I'm blessed to have a man who fears the Lord and longs to cultivate a deeper relationship with Christ every day. I'm glad I have a husband who cares more about my sanctification and presenting me without blemish than my circumstances & often faulty emotions. There's a song that is on Sara Groves latest c.d. called Fireflies & Songs and it says "I was drawn to you in ways I can't explain. We fought like crazy but I couldn't stay away. We piled on expectations and lots of blame. ; like we couldn't do it any other way." This was the beginning of our relationship- D.R. & I..... Sara Groves is unbelievable at putting to words what I feel in my heart. Anyways... put her new c.d. on your wishlist!
I'm thankful for our family and friends who are always there. I'm extra thankful for Kirstie, my younger sister. I've written about her a few times on here. We have a strong bond that I know is only possible because of the Lord's hand. Sisters are even better when they are your best friends. Love you Kirst. Mom and dad, I couldn't love you more. Thank you for raising me to love Jesus. It has been your best gift to me. Granny, oh granny... I don't think there's a memory of you that doesn't involve hugs and uplifting words and FUN! You taught me to embrace my silliness and be myself. I'm thankful for your generosity, your kindness, your love. Buddy: having you in the family is a delight. Thank you for your wisdom, discernment, hugs, and godliness.
I'm thankful for champ. He's been a good buddy to have during D.R.'s rotation hours.
I'm thankful for Grace Community Church. Our spiritual family. It's been a church body that I've grown the most because of. I love and know Christ more because of this body. You sharpen me, convict me, encourage me, correct me and continue to point me to the all-sufficient One.
I'm thankful for the ability to dance still. It's been a longtime passion of mine. I'm not one of those dancers who says "I feel most alive when I'm dancing". That's not true. Dance is a gift; an expression of art and life. But it is not my life. Dance has taught me that like most things in life, passions can become idols. God has granted me the grace to continue teaching dance because it's a way to express my devotion to Him. And so I am thankful I get to do that.
Most of all, I'm eternally thankful that the Creator of the universe thought of me and came to earth to purchase my salvation with His blood. I'm so glad He came and made a way for me to be with Him forever. I'll never grasp, this side of heaven, what it took for Him to pardon my sin. But now I get to be His child- his daughter. I get to sit at His feet and receive forgiveness and love. That's love I'll never be able to give; only receive.
And now for some little-ditty thanks :)
*bath and body works soap
*starbucks peppermint mocha
*iPod
*boots
*sunsets
*people who snort when they laugh (ahem... Jamie Shoe)
*sharpies
*sytycd
*target
*wildflowers in my backyard
*worship music
*kiwi
1 Chronicles 16:8
Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name; make known among the nations what he has done.
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